By the Fate of the Moon
by Shades of Ink
Summary: Remus forgets the day of the full moon at someone's expense. Includes why Peter betrayed everyone, why Snape betrayed evil, and step by step the war and it's affect on the Marauders. It's also partly a sequel to "Like an Open Window". Completed as of 327
1. Sneaking Food

The underground corridors were dark, and not to Rebecca's liking. It was late, but as a Prefect, it was her duty to patrol the halls. She had seen a few Slytherins smile at her as if they knew something she didn't.  
  
To them, she was a pureblood prize. A Ravenclaw - but the purest. The good looks and attitude were a bonus.  
  
Each one of them had gotten detention for being outside their dormitories after hours. And in turn, to Rebecca's disgust, each one had given her a sly grin as if she were just playing hard-to-get.  
  
*Sure, that's it.*  
  
As she walked through the dimly lit corridor, a voice from her right emerged from the shadows. "Come to see me, have you?" The person who had spoken stepped out of the darkness, and into view.  
  
Rebecca's eyes narrowed when she saw it was Lucius Malfoy. "Now why the bloody hell would I want to see you?" she asked coldly.  
  
Lucius smiled slightly and stepped towards her. "You ought to watch your mouth from now on. It could get you into trouble one of these days." He answered, gazing boldly into her eyes.  
  
"What are you doing, walking around, anyway?" she said, spitting out the words with disgust.  
  
But Lucius remained casual, and unnervingly calm. "I'm a Prefect - you couldn't possibly get me in trouble for it."  
  
*A Slytherin Prefect,* Rebecca mused. It was, in itself, a massive paradox.  
  
"Oh, shut up Lucius, nobody wants to listen to you." She said, turning away. But Lucius grabbed her arm, and grinned wickedly.  
  
"I'd like to see you try and make me." came the drawling voice in mock challenge.  
  
Anger boiled up inside of Rebecca. She smiled, elbowed him in the stomach, brought out her wand instantly and muttered "Silencio."  
  
Malfoy's eyes widened as he mouthed silent curses.  
  
"I think I just did."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rebecca Waters walked on and headed for one of the more brightly lit corridors.  
  
As she stepped into a broader stone hallway, she began to feel uneasy. She could feel some sort of - presence - in this hallway. She looked around to see nothing was around her.  
  
A Rebecca had a sense for these sorts of things. She had come from a long line of Seers - not to mention an endless heritage of pureblood families. She never doubted that sense, and right now it was trying to tell her something.  
  
Someone was here - in this corridor. In fact, Rebecca had the distinct feeling that the person was standing right in front of her.  
  
Rebecca pointed her wand towards the spot in mid-air and spoke, "I know you're here, so there's no use hiding."  
  
There came no reply from the empty space before her. Not long after, a Gryffindor Prefect rounded the corner across from Rebecca. It was Remus Lupin.  
  
"Hello, Becca." He said, and stopped when he saw the wand.  
  
"What are you doing, threatening nobody like that?" he asked with a playful grin spreading across his face.  
  
Rebecca sighed and turned her gaze back to the nothing in from of her. She aimed, and sent a Pinching Charm in the general direction. A muffled 'ow' came from the spot, and Lupin stepped forward.  
  
"Prongs, is that you?" he asked.  
  
"Who else would it be?" came the sarcastic reply.  
  
Rebecca frowned. "James? Why are you hiding?" she asked, and James let the cloak slip off his head. "You do know the Head Boy is allowed to wander aimlessly?" she added with a grin.  
  
Footsteps echoed, and James covered his head. Rebecca still had her wand out with Remus on the other side of the invisible James. Rebecca didn't have the chance to put away her wand when Professor McGonagall rounded the corner.  
  
Apparently, it appeared to her that the prefects were threatening each other. It must have been a strange and unlikely sight, and McGonagall looked shocked.  
  
Rebecca opened her mouth to explain, but Remus cut her off with a look that clearly said that James would be in trouble if he were found walking around invisible. Even if he was allowed to, it would be incredibly suspicious.  
  
They were both set off to their common rooms with detentions for the following night. Professor McGonagall had given them the same detention in fact, so they would learn to 'get along.'  
  
Remus smiled at Rebecca and she tried to hold back a laugh.  
  
*If only they could get along.*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Why in the world were you under the invisibility cloak in the dungeons?" Remus asked the next day.  
  
Sirius joined in, "And why didn't you let us in on it?"  
  
"Yeah," was all Peter could think of saying.  
  
James sighed, "It wasn't a major prank or anything - I just snuck down to the kitchens to get some food."  
  
"And you didn't give us any?" Sirius looked offended.  
  
Remus turned to Sirius, "Why would it matter now? It's already breakfast."  
  
"That's not the point." Sirius replied, turning back to James accusingly.  
  
James looked boldly into his best friend's face. "Padfoot, you know if I had gone for the cakes they were saving for the Christmas feast I would have brought you. But I didn't go for the cakes. I wasn't even getting the food for me."  
  
He glanced down the spot down the table where Lily usually sat. The other three marauders followed James's gaze and nodded in understanding. Ever since the attack on the muggle town a week ago, Lily hadn't come to any meals.  
  
James didn't know what it was like to lose his parents - especially muggles who had no way of defending themselves. So, he had no words of wisdom or comfort, but he did the best he could for Lily.  
  
It hurt him almost as bad as it hurt her, and the other marauders could tell. All James could do was bring her food when she failed to show up to dinner or lunch, or in this case breakfast.  
  
Remus brought out a book and began reading, when everyone else turned back to their food. James didn't feel much like eating, so he started stuffing food into his robes to bring back to the Gryffindor common room.  
  
"By the way, Moony, thanks for getting me out of trouble," he said, grabbing an apple and examining it.  
  
"No problem," he said offhandedly.  
  
"Even though it got you detention," James added, stuffing the apple in his pocket.  
  
Remus smiled from behind his book, "It's probably not as bad as what you and Padfoot get."  
  
Sirius snorted. It was amazing how many detentions they had gotten, and yet, Remus kept a clean record. Well, almost clean. He did help out with every prank, and sometimes saved the others from detention.  
  
All the same, he was the brains of the group, and detention didn't scare him at all, seeing as none of the teachers had anything against him.  
  
Sirius glanced at the book Remus was reading and saw that he had it open to an astronomical chart. "So when's the next full moon at?" he asked, leaning over to see.  
  
"The twentieth," he answered indifferently, as if it weren't of any interest to him.  
  
"Well, that's good, I mean, as long as it isn't during the holidays," Peter said.  
  
There was a moment of silence in which eating commenced, and James watched. He still couldn't eat, and his pockets were getting quite full. He broke the silence.  
  
"Guess what, I was-"  
  
"What?" Sirius interrupted with mock excitement. Remus chuckled, and Peter smiled.  
  
James gave Sirius a hard look before continuing, "I was looking in the library and-"  
  
"You? In the library?" Remus burst out. "Since when have you started going there?" Sirius laughed, and Peter gave only a small grin.  
  
"Do you want to hear about it or not?" James said, getting irritated by now.  
  
Remus sobered. "What is it you found in the library?" he asked, smiling.  
  
"A book tha-" James attempted to continue, only to be cut off by Sirius again.  
  
"Well that's obvious. What else would you get in the library?"  
  
James closed his eyes and clenched his teeth.  
  
"Fine then, I won't tell you how to enchant the map we've been working on," James said.  
  
Sirius stopped smiling, and Remus put down his book. "Enchant it to do what?" he asked, much more interested in the conversation than before.  
  
James grinned secretively, "Loads of things."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes, "Well that sure clears things up. It'd be incredibly frustrating if he didn't answer the question, wouldn't it?"  
  
AN: sorry it took so long to update (even if it was only a few days. Grrr!). It won't take so long from now on because I have the next few chapters already written so. yeah. 


	2. The Map is Born

Okay. If anyone has NOT read the first story and is reading this. GO READ THE FIRST STORY.  
  
Don't tell me I didn't warn you. *wink*  
  
Okay. that said. A DISCLAIMER!!! WOO!!  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter (wouldn't that be cool, though?) Everything I write about (except for Rebecca and few little things - like talking shoes) BELONGS to JK Rowling. And she's not about to share anything, so. yeah. Lucky her.  
  
Don't sue me because you probably won't get so much as a comb and a juice box.  
  
Now. on with the story.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The four of them gathered around the map, with 'Charms for Magical Documents' opened next to it.  
  
Peter looked around, "Is everyone gone to bed?"  
  
Remus looked up, "Yeah, except for that second year over there," he said, pointing to a small figure huddled in a large chair, buried in books and papers. " -but he looks like he's out cold."  
  
Sirius unrolled what was meant to be a map, but was really only a collaboration of sketches made of the school. It wasn't organized or legible enough to be considered a map.  
  
"So, what's the big spell that will change this lucky map's life forever?" he asked.  
  
James flipped through the pages of the book, "Actually it's a couple of spells. hold on. here it is," he said, pointing to the page.  
  
"A layering charm."  
  
Peter frowned, "Which is.?"  
  
"It layers a collection of images or documents so they can be viewed by summoning of the witch or wizard." James explained, obviously reading straight from the book.  
  
Peter furrowed his brow, "Which means.?"  
  
"Which means we can put all seven floors onto one map," Remus said. James nodded.  
  
Sirius brought out his wand, "So, what are we waiting for? Let's charm this sucker."  
  
James shrugged and handed the book to Sirius. "Charm away."  
  
Sirius scanned the page, and then cleared his throat importantly, and said, "Stratumus."  
  
He pointed to certain spots of the map, and repeated the spell, until all was done.  
  
"What's next?" he asked, looking up expectantly.  
  
James grabbed the book, "A concealment charm. page ninety-six."  
  
"Confidellius," he said, pointing at the map.  
  
"Anybody got a good idea for a password?" he asked.  
  
Sirius shrugged, "Sure, why?"  
  
"Well, we can't have anyone knowing that we have an entire map of the school in case it gets confiscated." Remus answered, catching on.  
  
"Exactly," James replied. "So.?"  
  
Peter, for once, brought out his own wand. "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good."  
  
"Good call, Wormtail," Sirius said.  
  
James pointed his wand back to the map and said, "Cryptify."  
  
"Hmmm." He mussed his hair as he thought, "Mischief managed," he finally decided.  
  
"So is that it?" Remus asked.  
  
Sirius picked up the map and examined it.  
  
James continued thumbing through the book until - "Ha!"  
  
"What?"  
  
James grinned and pointed to a brief passage at the bottom of the page. "A spell that insults anyone who doesn't know the password."  
  
Sirius grinned as well, "Excellent."  
  
James frowned, "But there's one thing."  
  
"What?"  
  
"It needs us to cough on it."  
  
"What?"  
  
James pointed again to the passage, "That's what it says."  
  
"In order for the comments to appear with the maker's name, handwriting, and general personality, the person must cough directly onto the parchment after saying the spell, and then close with Finite."  
  
James shrugged, said the spell, and gave a rather convincing cough with the map still in his hands.  
  
Sirius grabbed the map, came down with a sudden spell of hacking coughs, smiled and said, "That wasn't so bad."  
  
Sirius handed the map to Peter, who, in turn, gave a small ahem with the parchment in front of his mouth, and handed it to Remus.  
  
"At least I don't have to blow my nose into it," Remus said, and coughed.  
  
James took the map, and said "Finite" tapping his wand on the parchment four times.  
  
Sirius smiled eagerly. "I am a thick old bloke who doesn't know the password," he pronounced.  
  
And, for the first time, words appeared on the blank parchment, writing:  
  
Mr. Moony would like to say that he is astonished a bloke that thick could make such a map.  
  
Mr. Prongs agrees, but would like to add that Sirius must have the attention span of a goldfish to forget the password so quickly.  
  
Mr. Padfoot is ashamed to call himself Sirius.  
  
Mr. Wormtail is surprised that Sirius thought he could actually get past our complicated spells. Sadly, he truly is a stupid ugly git.  
  
As the words vanished, Sirius smiled fondly and his eyes glazed over. "I love this map."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Sorry to say that, as I started writing the story (I'm on like, chap. 6 now) . It started to turn out different as I thought. I was hoping to base it on Rebecca's point of view, but there's just so much events to cover with the marauders. Rebecca still is one of the very main characters even though she won't show up a lot. Later on, she will. Okay?  
  
As always, reviews are STRONGLY encouraged. *smiles* 


	3. Feeding Mennasprouts

With a moment of panic, Remus remembered he had detention that night. He glanced at the clock above the fireplace and gave a quick explanation for his rushed exit.  
  
Sirius laughed as he commented that Remus was always on time to everything, but ten minutes late to detention. Remus rolled his eyes, and fled the common room.  
  
He skidded down the halls, and out onto the grounds. It was a rather strange detention he had tonight - one that would be in the greenhouses. With a deep foreboding, Remus wondered what he might have to do in the greenhouses.  
  
He entered greenhouse three to see that Professor Sprout was carrying a large bucket of flobberworms, and looked incredibly flustered that Remus was late.  
  
"Five points from Gryffindor, Mr. Lupin." she said, and shoved the bucket of flobberworms into his arms.  
  
Remus was just wondering what he would be doing with the flobberworms when Rebecca stepped forward, and placed the bucket on the table next to her.  
  
"Thank goodness, you're here," she said, "I was beginning to think I would have to feed the Mennasprouts all by myself."  
  
Remus finally noticed the blue plants with yellow flowers that were, to Remus's dismay, snarling hungrily.  
  
"Is that what we're doing?"  
  
Rebecca nodded, and handed a pair of gloves to Remus. "You might want to use these."  
  
Remus took a deep breath, and put on the thick, dragon-skin gloves. Rebecca smiled encouragingly and handed him a pot full of snarling, vicious plant.  
  
"This is definitely going to be interesting," he said to her.  
  
She nodded, and grabbed a flobberworm from the bucket between them. She looked behind her to see that Sprout was gone.  
  
"Why was James under the invisibility cloak anyway?"  
  
Remus reluctantly stuck his hand into the bucket of flobberworms and pulled one out. "Sneaking food for Lily."  
  
Rebecca turned to Remus. "She still wont leave the common room?"  
  
Remus shook his head, and turned to his own mennasprout. He heard Rebecca cry out, and turned to see her holding her finger and glaring at the mennasprout she had tried to feed.  
  
Remus brought out his wand and mended her finger. She smiled at him and gave a quiet "Thank you." She was about to turn back to her snapping mennasprout when she stopped and looked at the wand Remus was holding, when a thought struck her.  
  
"We can use magic?" she asked.  
  
Remus looked at his wand. "Sprout didn't tell us not to."  
  
Rebecca sighed, "Why hadn't we thought of that in the first place?" She brought out her own wand, and levitated a flobberworm into her mennasprout's mouth - that is, if you could call it a mouth.  
  
She examined her finger. "Where'd you learn to heal like that?"  
  
Remus snorted, "I thought that would have been obvious."  
  
However, it was not obvious to Rebecca.  
  
Remus turned to look at her, "I mean, imagine how many times I've ended up in the hospital wing," he said.  
  
Rebecca looked at the ground. "Oh," she said. She had figured out about his condition in sixth year. It didn't bother her - she just couldn't imagine smiling, composed, clever Remus Lupin transforming into such a monster. It wasn't something she liked to think about.  
  
Remus, however, talked about it like it was the weather. "I ended up in the hospital wing so many times from biting and scratching myself that finally Madame Pomfrey gave up and told me it would be far too suspicious if a student noticed me injured every month. So, she just taught me all the healing spells I would need to know."  
  
Rebecca forced a smile and levitated another flobberworm. She could tell Remus hadn't taken his eyes off her. "It's really not that bad anymore," he said reassuringly.  
  
Rebecca turned back to him and suddenly noticed how tall he was compared to her. She had to look up at him to look him in the eyes - especially since he was so close.  
  
She nodded numbly, trying to remember what she was agreeing to. He laid a hand on her cheek, and Rebecca blinked to see a different Remus, a haunted Remus. His hair was out of place and he had dark circles under his eyes.  
  
Rebecca knew she was having a vision, and she was somewhat surprised - she didn't have visions very often.  
  
She saw him running through Hogwarts grounds, and then saw him stop dead in his tracks. She heard a wolf cry, and then saw him standing in front of a smoldering house that stood in its own ruins.  
  
Remus smiled and leaned into her. She jerked away, shocked at what she had seen - yet not knowing exactly what she had seen.  
  
Remus blinked and turned to his next mennasprout.  
  
Rebecca did not move for a moment, wondering if he had been about to kiss her. She sighed, thoroughly depressed that she had stepped back, and turned to her own hungry plant.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The weeks passed and Lily still refused to come out of the girl's dormitory. Especially for Christmas since she had nowhere to go. James struggled with trying to get her to come down. He wasn't sure it was any of his business. He glanced around the common room to see Dorcas Meadowes, a fellow seventh year, gazing at Sirius dreamily.  
  
James snorted, and walked up to her. Her gaze turned to James, and she looked up wide-eyed at him. "Could you try to get Lily to come down?"  
  
The girl was at a loss for words - she obviously had a thing for James as much as for Sirius. "Sure," she answered, her blushing face bearing a small smile, and ran up the steps to the girl's dormitory.  
  
Moments later she came back down, crestfallen. "She said she doesn't want to talk about it."  
  
James sighed, "Tell her that she's *going* to talk about it."  
  
Dorcas eyed James as if unsure he really meant persisting at the issue, and ascended the stairs again.  
  
It didn't take long for her to come back down with an answer. "She says you're really not helping."  
  
James glared at the door to the girl's dormitory, "That's because she won't let me help," he said defiantly.  
  
Dorcas shook her head, and sighed sadly.  
  
But James continued, "Fine then, I'll make her come down. I'll go up there myself if I have to."  
  
"You can go ahead and try, but no boy can get up that staircase," she said matter-of-factly.  
  
Sirius unexpectedly joined the conversation, "Now, who came up with *that* idea?" he exclaimed.  
  
"Oh, hello Miss Meadowes," he added politely with a grin.  
  
Dorcas blushed furiously, and gave a small "hi" to Sirius.  
  
Sirius turned to James, "It's no use, mate. Just forget about it."  
  
James looked again at the door to the girl's dormitory, and then turned back to Dorcas, "Just - just give this to her, will you?" he asked, handing her a biscuit he had taken from the table at lunch.  
  
She nodded, and Sirius and James joined with Remus and Peter, and they all left the common room for the Christmas Feast.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The four marauders came back to the common room with their spirits slightly lifted. Remus and Peter went to go play a game of wizard's chess, and Sirius had just spotted Dorcas Meadowes, and walked swiftly over to her. Sirius's arrival brought a multitude of giggles from the girls that were around. One of them even waved at James, and he smiled.  
  
He scanned the room, and halted his search when he caught a fleeting glimpse of red hair. He saw that the red hair belonged to a girl that was sitting in a chair by the fireplace.  
  
James smiled. There was only one Gryffindor with hair that red.  
  
He pulled up an armchair next to Lily, and didn't say anything, afraid that maybe she really didn't want to talk to him.  
  
Nevertheless, he found himself speaking, "Hello," he said cheerfully.  
  
Lily turned and looked at him through her tears.  
  
James looked mortified, and started stumbling over his words, "I - I'm sorry, I. I didn't mean to - "  
  
But Lily cut him off with a smile.  
  
"I shouldn't have bothered you," James said miserably.  
  
Lily shook her head and ignored his comment. "Thanks for the biscuit," she said.  
  
James smiled nervously - though he didn't know why. He was never nervous around girls. but Lily.  
  
"Sure. um. I'm sure my parents wouldn't mind you staying for the holidays," he said.  
  
"Really?" she asked, looking in his eyes in a way she hadn't before.  
  
"Yeah, no problem," he said stupidly.  
  
She smiled, and James hoped so much he had helped. He desperately wished she was feeling just a little less pain than she had been feeling before. James was relieved to see that her eyes were smiling as much as her face was.  
  
Her eyes were so green.  
  
James wasn't sure if it was him or Lily, or maybe if they had met halfway. All he was sure of was her lips on his - her tears streaming down his cheek.  
  
James wasn't sure if it was real or not. *Was this the same Lily Evans he knew? Isn't she the girl that hated him so much?*  
  
James felt like it was Christmas.  
  
*It is Christmas, you idiot,* he told himself.  
  
Lily pulled back, and smiled. She almost laughed. James felt suddenly giddy. He wouldn't mind laughing either.  
  
Awwww. got some LJ romance goin here. *so cute!* Remus and Becca? Who'da thunkit? Ha. It was pretty obvious.  
  
Anyhoo. yup. It's getting all confusing and prophetic again. Gosh darn, I know it's annoying! Review and tell me how I'm doing.  
  
If this story is a crappy waste of time and everybody hates it - I'd like to know.  
  
*smilies* 


	4. The First Defiance

keyword: FIRST defiance. The chapter title partly has to do with the prophecy in Book 5. *born to those who have THRICE DEFIED HIM* Yup. So, this is the first defiance. It's corny, I know.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ever since Sirius had left his family when he was sixteen, he had been staying with the Potters during holidays. He promised he would buy his own flat when he got the money.   
  
James's parents had offered Sirius the money, but he had refused to take it each time. This year wouldn't be any different. Sirius still didn't have the money, and James knew his mom and dad would offer it to him, only to bear witness to Sirius's unwavering stubbornness. Or maybe it was pride. The latter certainly seemed more appealing.  
  
James had sent an owl home the day before, making sure it was alright if Lily stayed with them, and his parents had quickly replied to say they would be delighted.   
  
Sirius snorted as the train pulled up to the King's Cross Station, and the Potters gave James a huge hug. *What a perfect family,* he thought.   
  
James introduced Lily to his parents, and then Mrs. Potter turned to Sirius and gave him a hug, just as big. Sirius smiled. By now, he was practically a son to them. And he didn't mind that at all.  
  
Mrs. Potter was definitely more of a mother to him than that sour woman in Grimmauld Place. Sirius just hadn't been royal enough for them – the Blacks. He had become the black sheep of the family ever since the Sorting Hat had told him he wasn't like his mother and father, and sorted him into Gryffindor.   
  
But thanks to Narcissa and Bellatrix and Regulus and who knows how many other family members that spied on him during school and had reported to the family like good little Slytherin children, his whole family had become aware of the fact that Sirius talked to mudbloods, lowered himself to their status, and showed respect for that fool of a Headmaster, Dumbledore. (Not that countless pranks counted for respect, but that was a whole other story.)  
  
Sirius remembered the day when he had come home for the summer holidays, right after his first year had ended, to see that Andromeda's name was no longer on the tapestry that had the family tree embroidered in the fabric. She had been disowned.   
  
As Sirius stood in front of the Potter's home, he silently wished to himself that his name had been erased from the tapestry as well.   
  
~~~~~~~~~~   
  
Generation after generation of Potters had lived in this house. It had always been a wealthy family, all of them Gryffindors, all of them in this house. Mr. Potter, and his father, and his father after that, and his father after that, and so on.  
  
They were a pure blood family, but had been despised by many other pure blood families. It hadn't always been that way, though. The Potters had been good friends with the Blacks, that is, until a man named Tom Riddle had given himself a name, and Slytherins and Gryffindors once again went their separate ways.  
  
Mr. and Mrs. Potter had flatly refused to be involved with what they called a racial genocide. Many of the pure families had been contacted and had been given the opportunity to be part of this. Most had joined – of course, except for the Potters, the Weasleys, the Waters' and a few other families.  
  
James didn't seem to worry about whether or not his family was in danger. Sirius wasn't sure if he could really say they were in danger, but he definitely had a different perspective. After all, he had heard what the other families said about the Potters.  
  
Sirius had been shunned for talking to a Potter. James didn't see.  
  
But whether James had seen it coming or not, it came.  
  
On the night of Christmas Eve, the nightmare began.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sirius yawned, "I think it's true what they say about turkey making you sleepy."  
  
James snorted. He was tired, too. Lily would be staying in the guest room, and James would be sharing his room with Sirius.  
  
Sirius grabbed a pillow off of James's bed and tossed it onto the floor. James frowned as Sirius laid down on the carpet, and rested his head against the pillow.  
  
"Are you sure you don't want me to bring in a mattress or something? You don't have to sleep on the floor."  
  
Sirius put his hands behind his head and smiled, "Nope, I'm fine. After this, I'll have my own place, and you won't have to worry about me."  
  
James shook his head, "Be realistic, Padfoot. How in the bloody world are you going to get the money for that?"  
  
"I'll get a job soon," he said defensively.  
  
James snorted, and flopped onto his own bed.  
  
Padfoot getting a job? That would never happen.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The mass of cloaked wizards assembled in Godric's Hollow to listen to their master's instructions. The trees rustled in the silent wind, and a high cruel voice sounded without echo.  
  
"If you have not already heard, we are here to show the families that have rejected us that they will pay for their refusal. Macnair, Rabastan and Crabbe – you will kill the Waters family."  
  
Three wizards nodded, and apparated in a second, grins concealed behind their masks.  
  
"Travers, Goyle, Avery – the Farells."  
  
"Rosier, Rookwood, Karkarrof – the Storms."  
  
"Muliciber, Nott, Jugson – the Junes."  
  
The wizards nodded, but before disapparating, one death eater spoke up, "What about the Potters?"  
  
Voldemort's red eyes looked as if they had been turned to ice. "I will deal with them," he answered with a voice like acid.  
  
The same death eater questioned his master again, "Why not let one of us do it, my lord?"  
  
The creature that was once Tom Riddle turned and rounded on the wizard, who now looked small and pitiful compared to him. "Do you think, Rookwood, that the Dark Lord could do no better of a job than his subjects?"  
  
"Forgive me, my lord."  
  
"Do not doubt me again. The day you doubt me is the day you vanish from this circle. I will kill you."  
  
"I will not doubt again, my lord."  
  
Voldemort turned back to the rest of the death eaters still assembled. "Mr. Potter is an auror that has killed many in these ranks. I will not leave the task to any of you this time. The dark lord knows what he is doing."  
  
The death eaters apparated with their tasks, and Voldemort turned down Godric's Hollow, intending to wipe out the Potters' name.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rebecca had stayed at school for the holidays, since her parents were leaving for a trip to France on Christmas Day. It was the night of Christmas Eve, and Rebecca was sleeping soundly in her dormitory.  
  
On that night, her parents were killed – along with numerous other families. Rebecca woke up with a start. She was sure that a flash of green light had awoken her, but nobody was in the dormitory other than her.  
  
Her father was a seer, too. He would have seen it coming. Or at least he would have seen something. The truth was, he had seen something.   
  
He was lying in his bed, dreaming of death, right when the life left his body.  
  
Rebecca did not know her family was dead, but she felt it. She could not shake off the feeling she had. The feeling that the sun might not rise in the morning.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James opened his eyes to see a frantic Sirius, shaking him by the shoulders.   
  
"James!"  
  
"What?" he asked, slightly irritated.  
  
Sirius did not answer, for the cry of James's mother answered it all. James leapt up, and ran out the door. He shot down the hallways, and into his parents' bedroom. There laid his father, and mother, and…  
  
"Say goodnight, Potter."  
  
Sirius jumped in front of the shocked James and brought out his wand from his pocket. "EXPELLIARMIUS!" he yelled.  
  
The spell ran straight towards Voldemort, but strayed to the left with a wave of his wand.  
  
"Crucio."  
  
Sirius collapsed to the ground, and began to convulse. He let out strangled yells – attempts to voice the pain and utter torture he was enduring.  
  
James never knew the threat of Voldemort had been so real. He never thought of it as much as he should have. Voldemort had steadily risen to power, and James just happened to be in his way. He was just another death – another name on the memorial.  
  
The dark lord raised his wand, this time at James. He was the last Potter. The only thing that kept James from closing his eyes and drawing in his last breath were the cries of Sirius.  
  
"NO!"  
  
Voldemort blinked, his wand raised. Moments from impending death, James had cried out in defiance.  
  
*Why am I still alive?*  
  
The song of the phoenix was heard by both James and the dark lord. Fawkes flew through the open window, announcing the presence of Dumbledore.  
  
Voldemort stared numbly at the phoenix, and with his last moment, he assured James of his death.  
  
"No one defies Lord Voldemort, and lives to tell the tale. I will make sure of that."  
  
And he was gone.  
  
Sirius lay still at last, rapidly breathing, and drowning in pain.  
  
"James?" came a timid voice behind him.  
  
James didn't turn around. He couldn't. He would see the hurt in Lily's eyes, and the tears would make him cry. He looked down at his parents, briefly wising he had suffered the same fate.  
  
But he would, soon enough. He would die. He couldn't cry about it. He wouldn't turn around. He defied Lord Voldemort, and would not live to tell the tale. *Why cry over the dead, if you know you'll die the same way?*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Ok, ok, I know Remus and rebecca are supposed to be the main characters, but I'm going to have a lot of different parts of the story. This is like the sequel plus the COMPLETE story of the marauders and everybody COMBINED. There might even be a small part with regulus's point of view, and why he tried to run from being a death eater, and Snape's point of view, and why he became a spy.  
  
I know it's hard to follow along with me jumping around like that, but I've been waiting forever to write a story like this. I've been practically STUDYING the HP books to find every bit of info I can get, and gosh darn it, I'm gonna use all of it. 


	5. The Perfect Medicine

Guess what? *drumroll*  
  
Another disclaimer! WOOO!  
  
Disclaimer: This is a disclaimer. You should know what that means by now, so, naturally, all the terms apply. I do not own this. Well, I guess I own THIS, but not most of the stuff in it. Even if that made no sense whatsoever, just nod your head.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~`  
  
James, Sirius and Lily went back to school early. Dumbledore really had saved their lives that night, and had taken them back to the castle without a word. Christmas had been especially silent.  
  
Each student was afraid to break the silence that had settled around them. Nobody was really sure what would be the best thing to say, so they all decided individually to say nothing.  
  
The day for the students to finally arrive back from the holidays arrived. Sirius was writing on an especially long roll of parchment, and James was attempting to sleep in, though his eyes were wide open.  
  
The dormitory door opened, and there stood a weary Remus Lupin. He dropped his trunk, and said only one thing - which expressed everything on his mind.  
  
"I read the paper."  
  
James closed his eyes tightly, desperately willing himself to sleep. Sirius sighed sadly, and turned to the huddled figure of James.  
  
" We know you're awake, James. Just. talk."  
  
James sat up to see not only Remus had arrived, but Peter as well.  
  
"Was there anyone else who." James asked Remus.  
  
Remus nodded, "Yeah. the Storms - they were friends of my dad's, the Junes - I haven't heard of them, the Farrels - Jim Farrel graduated in our second year," Remus paused as his eyes turned foggy. ".and the Waters."  
  
James's eyes widened, and Sirius spoke up, "You mean - Becca's family?" he asked, closely watching Remus's reaction.  
  
But he didn't seem to react much - he only nodded.  
  
It was then James realized he wasn't the only person affected by death. "Was she - ?"  
  
"The paper didn't go into much detail." Remus answered in a hollow voice. Silence followed this statement.  
  
"I'm sorry, James." Sirius said suddenly, his gaze fixed on the parchment he had been writing on.  
  
James shook his head. "Don't be, you woke me up when it happened."  
  
"Maybe they should have just done what the Death Eaters had told them," Peter muttered under his breath.  
  
Remus snapped in the direction of Peter's voice. "What did you say?" he asked harshly.  
  
Sirius was standing now, his eyes threatening. James was torn between shock and anger.  
  
Peter's eyes shifted to each one of them nervously. "Nothing."  
  
By now, lunch was drawing close, and all four of them were very hungry.  
  
They all walked into the Great Hall, with Remus in front. When he stepped through the doors, however, he stopped, and the other three walked past him. Realizing Remus was behind them, they stopped as well.  
  
Remus stood in front of Rebecca, speechless. At first, he wanted to say everything he had been thinking. He wanted to hug her tightly and tell her it was okay, and that she was so lucky, and.  
  
But another thought told him to just stand there and say nothing. This was the easier thing to do. He searched her face for something - anything.  
  
Becca didn't say a thing either. What would she have to say?  
  
He gave her a small smile, and went to the Gryffindor table, his mind silent, but his heart screaming at him for saying nothing.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Classes had started again, and now the teachers were beginning to mention the N.E.W.T.s, and how much they affected your future, and how they defined the kind of wizard you would become, etc. etc...  
  
James, Sirius, Peter and Remus already had enough to think about even without the NEWTs drawing closer. The air between all of them was quiet and tense.  
  
Sirius, being who he is, felt it was his duty to loosen everyone up. He was in pain as well, but if everyone were a little happier, he'd be able to move on with his life a lot easier.  
  
The rather long roll of parchment he had been writing on had been ideas - rather mischievous ones. A few were a bit cruel and unusual, but in his mind, the Slytherins deserved it.  
  
After much attempts and a little bit of begging, he had convinced James to go along with it. Peter and Remus were open as always to a good prank.  
  
To Sirius, this was the first step to success. His spirits lifted and a grin crept across his face as he explained the plans he had made.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The Marauders strolled into the Great Hall for breakfast in an innocently casual way, but with their heads held high.  
  
The Slytherins would arrive at any moment. Of course, they would be late to breakfast - but at least one Slytherin had to show up.  
  
Sirius felt like making a big loud drum roll on the table with his hands, but he felt it would draw far too much suspicion towards him, so he sat quietly with his three friends, smiling as big as he could without his face splitting.  
  
And, with much reluctance, the Slytherins arrived. Their robes sported the Gryffindor colors quite flamboyantly, and they were also about five sizes too small.  
  
The Great Hall erupted with laughter. Remus closed his eyes and laughed, Sirius was practically rolling on the floor, and Peter sniggered as he watched Sirius fall over again and again.  
  
Rebecca had her head in her hands, Lily was smiling knowingly at James, and James - for the first time in weeks - allowed himself a small grin. What would he do without Padfoot?  
  
Sirius, in a nutshell. Dontcha just love him to death? 


	6. The Lost Map

Ha! I'm back! Snape's a git. Hehe  
  
~~~~~~  
  
Severus Snape hated James Potter. He hated Sirius Black. He would show the world what Remus Lupin really was. He would show that stupid Pettigrew that he had hidden behind the wrong sort. He hated all of them. It was that simple - yet just as complicated.  
  
James Potter was perfect, and everyone knew it. Not only that, he was Head Boy. Every girl - even a few Slytherin girls - would fawn over him, and hang off of his every arrogant word. Then, just when Snape could get his revenge, James had to turn all good and save his life and.  
  
Severus Snape hated James Potter for putting him in such a groveling position. He would never thank Potter for what he did. He had chickened out - saved his own skin.  
  
His parents had been fools, and they had died for it. Then, stupid Potter had to make himself the hero and save everybody again. Snape knew this was the wrong thing to do - to aggravate the Dark Lord.  
  
Voldemort would claim power, and the high and mighty James Potter will be wishing he had died that Christmas Eve.  
  
Snape promised himself he would be there standing in the ranks of the Dark Lord's army to watch James Potter beg for death.  
  
And Snape would not chicken out and play the hero. He would watch Potter die in pain, and he would not save him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
January 17th would have been something for Remus to dread, if he hadn't had his three friends with him. The Marauder's map was already proving to be a great aspect to the efficiency of their plans.  
  
But now that the map was finished, there was no need to explore the way they used to - they already knew where everything was by now.  
  
"What are we going to do?" Sirius asked as he watched the sun lower steadily towards the horizon.  
  
Peter didn't give much thought to the question before answering, "We should do something to the Slytherins."  
  
The others usually would have been all for it, but this time they weren't - over the course of seven years it had started to get a little tired.  
  
They were Marauders, and the Marauders were legendary pranksters. They had to come up with something creative.  
  
James considered this and he grinned wickedly as he came up with the perfect victim, "Hey, how about Filch?"  
  
Sirius grinned as well, "So, what should we do to the poor guy?"  
  
Silence followed as the marauders racked their brains for the perfect idea. *The perfect idea*. all heads turned to Remus Lupin, who smiled.  
  
"What, you think I have an idea?" he asked, but his mischievous grin gave him away.  
  
"Yes," came Padfoot's reply.  
  
"Okay, we all know he's a squib, right?" Moony began.  
  
They all nodded. Remus' grin broadened. "Well, it's simple isn't it? Lock him in his office, and he won't have the power to get himself out."  
  
James smiled and nodded, and Sirius beamed, "I knew you'd come through for us, Moony."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus turned to Sirius, "I'll have to stay back when Prongs goes forward to do the spell. He has to turn back to human in order to at least *hold* the wand - let alone say the spell. You'll have to keep me from following him.  
  
He then turned to James, "You can't let me see you when you transform back into a human. I'll kill you."  
  
James smirked, "Is that a threat, Moony?"  
  
Remus eyed him darkly, warning him not to toy with the issue. James knew he wouldn't kill him, but the wolf would.  
  
The sun was setting, and the moon was already drawing nigh to the horizon. Madame Pomfrey was waiting outside the common room for Remus, just early enough that they could make it to the Whomping Willow.  
  
Pomfrey took him as far as the tunnel, and Remus walked the rest alone. He could feel the wolf growl from inside him as the moon began to rise.  
  
He stepped into the shack, and an icy chill ran through the room. The moonlight shone through the window, and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end.  
  
The growl that had been stirring inside of him crept up his throat as he crouched onto all fours, and the wolf took over all senses. Remus was mostly gone by now, and the wolf had nothing to devour. He scratched himself, and not long after could smell warm fresh blood. That's when he noticed it was his own.  
  
The wolf started biting and clawing at his own fur, completely unaware of the fact that somewhere in there was a sleeping Remus Lupin. The wolf was taking over, and injuring himself until he felt something bite his left ear.  
  
He turned around, furious and hungry, to see a giant shaggy black dog threatening him with his teeth bared. Padfoot had come to save Moony from the wolf. The wolf lashed out, and a giant stag stepped in front of the dog.  
  
*Wake up, Moony.*  
  
The wolf growled, but before he could strike, a strange feeling struck his heart. Not the wolf's heart. something human.  
  
The wolf cowered back, and Remus came through. He looked at his friends to make sure he hadn't bitten anyone. Padfoot stepped forward cautiously. Moony nodded, and Wormtail crawled out from behind a crack in the wall. It was a good thing he had hidden - the wolf could have eaten him without a second thought.  
  
Padfoot picked up the map from the ground with his teeth, and Moony noticed that Wormtail had a wand wedged in his tiny mouth.  
  
Prongs went first out of the shack, and the rest followed. They left the invisibility cloak in the Shrieking Shack, since they didn't need it now that they were animals. Nobody could get a dog or a rat in trouble for wandering around at night. A stag and a wolf wandering with them might be a bit conspicuous, but they tried not to worry too much about it - especially since they were sure they hadn't been spotted before.  
  
The only students other than the Marauders that knew about Remus's secret were Becca, Lily, and Snape. But none of them knew about how the other three tagged along every month as illegal animagi.  
  
They reached the corridor that was right around the corner from where Filch's office was, and Padfoot dropped the map from his mouth, and with a bit of difficulty, unrolled it on the ground with his paws.  
  
Fortunately, Filch was in his office according to plans, and now James could lock the door.  
  
Prongs eyed Moony warily, and Wormtail spit out his wand. The rat scurried away, and Padfoot led Moony away from the corridor, and down a flight of stairs.  
  
Moony could tell right when Prongs had turned back into James - he could smell it. An animal instinct was roused inside of him, and the wolf began to sniff out the trail. Padfoot bit his ear again, and Moony growled, regaining control.  
  
Padfoot stiffened. The dog in him could sense an animal behind him - a cat, most likely. He turned around to see a pair of glowing green cat eyes staring back at him. The cat stepped forward and hissed. With horror, Padfoot realized that Mrs. Norris had not shown up on the map as being inside Filch's office.  
  
She had stayed outside to keep watch. The cat called out for Filch, and Padfoot gave a loud bark. Within seconds Wormtail, Padfoot, and Moony could hear the sound of galloping hooves echoing throughout the halls.  
  
Prongs had to slow immensely to safely get down the stone steps without injuring himself. He had his wand in his mouth, and was looking panicked.  
  
The four of them got back to the Shrieking Shack out of breath, and saw that the sky was beginning to lighten slightly, and dawn was approaching.  
  
Wormtail curled up with a breadcrumb he had found on the floor of the shack, and Moony and Prongs tried to catch their breath.  
  
Padfoot however, gave a loud howl, and began barking viciously at nothing. Prongs, Moony, and Wormtail looked around at him questioningly.  
  
Padfoot nudged and rubbed his nose toward the ground, but nothing was there. That was the point - there was nothing there. That's what the dog was indicating.  
  
He had left the map on the floor in front of Filch's office.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Dun dun dun... sorry I didn't update for a while (even if it WAS only a few days. PATIENCE, people!)  
  
I don't know if you've heard about the fires all throughout Southern California, but I'm right in the middle of it, so ya, it's a lil hectic. I hope I don't have to evacuate or anything.  
  
Reviews! Thoughts? Reactions? Incoherent obscenities? Whatever they are, I wanna hear them! 


	7. Peter and Wormtail

"I'll get it back – I have to," Sirius decided aloud, his head in his hands.  
  
"Get it back from Filch?" Peter squeaked.  
  
"You're nuts, Padfoot," Remus said.  
  
James bit his lip as he considered it, "How would you do it?" he finally asked Sirius when he failed to come to a conclusion.  
  
Sirius scratched his head, "That's the thing – I don't know."  
  
Remus shook his head – deciding they'd be better off with advice than without a plan. "You'd need a diversion."  
  
James's eyes brightened as an idea struck him, "Peeves. He'll be more than happy to bother Filch."  
  
Sirius nodded, "When should we do it?"  
  
He looked up expectantly at the other three, but they only turned to one another uncertainly.  
  
"What?" he asked, noticing the skeptical looks on their faces.  
  
"Are you sure it's even possible?" Peter asked tentatively.  
  
"Of course it is!" Sirius answered defiantly.  
  
Peter looked down.  
  
"I'll help," James said suddenly.  
  
Sirius smiled and turned to Remus.  
  
Remus sighed, "Yeah."  
  
"We'll I'm not!" Peter exclaimed, much to everyone's surprise.  
  
"For once I'm making my own decision. I'm surprised you haven't tried to put words in my mouth by now," he continued, shocked at his own daring.  
  
"I'm not getting in trouble again because of you," he finally concluded.  
  
Remus eyed him incredulously, and James gave him a hard look. Sirius, however, remained calm, "Sure, Wormtail. You do that."  
  
He turned to James and Remus. "Let's go now."  
  
They left as soon as Sirius had suggested, and didn't bring anything with them.  
  
Peter frowned as he watched them leave the common room.  
  
He glanced at James's trunk to see the invisibility cloak there. Peter walked over to it, and considered a crazy idea that had occurred to him at the moment.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So, what do you need me for?" Remus asked as they walked down the stairs to the floor where Filch's office was.  
  
"That diversion you were talking about," James answered.  
  
"Oh, Peeves?"  
  
Sirius nodded.  
  
Remus frowned, "I hate to burst your bubble, but how am I supposed to find Peeves if we don't have the map?"  
  
James shrugged, and ran his hand through his hair, messing it up. Sirius hit his head with his hand in frustration, "I forgot the cloak, too."  
  
Remus sighed, "Well, this is working out better than I thought," he said sarcastically.  
  
"Well, we can't get it now, we're already here. If we go back, that'll just increase our chances of getting caught." James said, messing up his hair again – a nervous habit that had always stuck with him.  
  
"Well, then, let's just go in and hope for the best." Sirius said, shrugging his shoulders and stepping inside the office.  
  
It was more of an extended broom closet with filing cabinets than an office. James ran in and began to frantically search through the filing cabinets.  
  
"I guess you won't need me to distract Filch since he isn't even here," Remus said.  
  
Sirius began looking through the filing cabinet drawers as well, "Well, then help us find the map."  
  
"It's not in this one," James said when he had thoroughly searched one of the drawers.  
  
"It's not in this one, either," Sirius replied, growing steadily more disappointed.  
  
James looked around, "Well, it has to be somewhere in here."  
  
"What about that one over there?" Remus suggested, pointing to a drawer that was labeled, *Confiscated and Highly Dangerous.*  
  
"Let's hope that's the one," Sirius said, but before he could reach the drawer, he heard the meow of a cat.  
  
He stopped in mid-step. "Please tell me that was you, Prongs."  
  
"No such luck, mate," James replied.  
  
Sirius turned around slowly to see Mrs. Norris staring back at him. "That stupid cat is *everywhere!*"  
  
James felt as if something had dropped in the pit of his stomach, "Oh blimey, Filch is coming!" he whispered.  
  
They could already hear Filch's footsteps come closer to the door to the office, "What is it, my sweet?" came the rough voice calling out to his cat.  
  
In a short moment of panic, the three marauders knew they would be caught. But, seconds before Filch rounded the corner, they could see Peter's face floating in midair in the corner of the room. A pudgey hand came out of nowhere and motioned for them.  
  
"Get under the cloak!" Peter whispered quickly.  
  
The three of them acted without hesitation, and by the time Filch stepped into the office, they were all completely hidden from sight.  
  
Mrs. Norris hissed at them, obviously knowing they were there, but Filch didn't seem to notice.  
  
Sirius sneezed and Remus stepped on his foot. Peter stumbled slightly, and James tried to adjust the cloak accordingly, so Filch wouldn't see them.  
  
However, the small racket had been quite obvious, and Filch snapped his head around, but only to see that nothing was there.   
  
"Who is it?" he asked the corner accusingly.  
  
He narrowed his eyes at the four of them, almost as if expecting to see a student jump out of midair. (Which, in this case, was very possible.)  
  
He gave a disappointed grunt, and turned back to what he was doing. The four of them inched their way slowly to the door, and by the time they were outside the office, Filch's suspicions were confirmed when he noticed that all of his filing cabinet drawers were opened.  
  
"POTTER! BLACK!"  
  
They started off at a run, no longer trying to stay under the cloak. After running down countless numbers of stairs, they looked back to see that Filch hadn't caught up with them, yet. When they reached the common room, they were sure Filch had given up by then.  
  
Peter coughed, trying to catch his breath, and James dropped onto one of the couches.  
  
Remus and Sirius both clapped Peter on the back. "You've redeemed yourself Wormtail," Sirius said. The three of them were smiling, and laughing about how close that had been. Sirius kept joking about the look on Filch's face, but James didn't smile.  
  
Something was wrong about Peter, James was sure of it. Did he save their skin because he was sorry about what he said, or was he only covering up for it?  
  
Remus and Sirius didn't seem to notice how curious it really was, but James did. Of course, they wouldn't see his true colors until years after.   
  
~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Yeah, I think I told you about how this story is going to be full of different people's points of view. Peter's one of 'em. I'm gonna show his "development as a character" or, in other words, "what turned him into the stupid git he is"  
  
hehe.  
  
REVIEWS!  
  
Nixiy: Yes, there is *despite my lack of writing about it* a love triangle between Lucius/Remus/Rebecca, it'll happen in a couple a chapters. Yes, tis a bit scary. I don't like scary, but this story will get scary. For heaven's sakes, it's the friggin rise and fall of Voldemort! *runs and hides* You have a thing for arranging people's weddings, don't you? Well, James and Lily are going to have a VERY (and I mean very) early wedding. The Remus/Becca one is for a couple of years. (which translates into about twenty chapters) YES, THIS WILL BE LONG! *please don't hurt me, I'm still recovering from that fryingpan attack* Not only are the schools shut down, but seminary is as well, WOOHOO! (I'm still creeped out by the "Brother Voldemort" thing. eck.)  
  
Valarauko: The coughing on the map thing was just a random thing on my part. No clue where it came from. Ah, the prophetic junk... they're actually scenes from future chapters. So, I guess that requires patience (even patience on my part, because I REALLY want to write those chapters!) oh, and thanx for the pardon. It makes me feel... *searches for the right word*... pardoned. Luckily, the fires have moved AWAY from San Marcos and more into the mountains. Woohoo! Still no school!  
  
flying-piggy-123: You remembered the moon&water thing? *wipes a tear from her eye* Yeah, that was supposed to be foreshadowing something about Luna. Dun dun dunnn... Glad you liked the Evil Librarian chapter!  
  
soccergirl45: Glad you like it! Woohoo! *somebody likes my story!*  
  
queenlucy-3: Hehe, I just couldn't within my right mind write a story WITHOUT a lily/james kinda thing. Thankies for the spifferific review! *spifferific? wow. that's new.* 


	8. Uncle Alphard's Favorite Nephew

AN: Okay, yesterday was the Boy-Who-Lived Day (Halloween, you dunderheads!), so today would be... um...  
  
a little help here? Sirius Black Azkaban Day? Not that we should celebrate it at all...  
  
Okay, this chapter has to do with what Sirius said in OotP (pg 111) about his Uncle being blown off the tapestry because he left his fortune to Sirius.  
  
Ha.  
  
Ha.  
  
~~~  
  
The owl flew into the Great Hall along with a multitude of other owls, and scoped out for it's recipient.   
  
Sirius was casually stealing pancakes from Antonin Dolohov's plate, when a familiar owl landed in front of him.  
  
Dolohov turned around, noticed the pancake levitated over his plate, and the owl took a bit of the pancake as Sirius innocently took the letter from the owl's leg.  
  
Dolohov glared, and Sirius eyed him warily before turning back around to open the note. There was no mistaking who the letter was from. Sirius knew that owl. It was the purest black of all the owls around.  
  
He was receiving a letter from his family.  
  
He wished he didn't have to open it.  
  
*At least it isn't a howler,* he thought to himself.  
  
It had been a while since he had gotten a letter from his family that wasn't a howler. Come to think of it, Sirius wasn't sure he had ever gotten a letter from his family that wasn't a howler.  
  
He opened it with a small bit of hesitation, and his face fell when he saw what it said.  
  
James was watching Sirius closely as he read the letter, and was slightly startled when Sirius smiled unexpectedly.  
  
"What?" James asked.  
  
"My Uncle Alphard's dead," he replied with utmost excitement.  
  
"That's terrible," Peter said.  
  
"Why are you so happy about it?" Remus asked.  
  
Sirius grinned, "I have to go to the Ministry of Magic for the reading of his will, so I'll have to miss our Potions final!"  
  
James snorted.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"To my wife, Elladora Black," the ministry worker began, "I leave the sum of one thousand, three hundred and twenty two galleons."  
  
Sirius's Aunt Elladora sniffed angrily, and the barrister continued.  
  
"To my eldest daughter, Andromeda Tonks, I leave the sum of eight hundred and seventy eight galleons."  
  
Andromeda smiled at her husband, and tickled her small daughter, who giggled – and to Sirius's astonishment, the little girl's hair turned blonde right in front of his eyes. Aunt Elladora gave Andromeda a disgusted look, and the barrister continued with the reading.  
  
"To my daughter, Narcissa Black, I leave four hundred and fifty galleons, and to my youngest daughter, Bellatrix Black, I leave my twelve inch maple and dragon heartstring wand and the sum of two hundred and thirty five galleons."  
  
Narcissa and Bellatrix looked at each other in astonishment, and Sirius knew exactly what they were thinking. *Surely, Alphard Black had a larger fortune than that…*  
  
The family began to turn away from the ministry official, and just when Sirius started wondering why he was asked to come, the barrister called out, "Wait, there is one last thing written."  
  
Elladora and her two youngest daughters glared at Sirius before turning back around for their father's last words. Andromeda, however, smiled at Sirius, and gave him a small wink before turning her attention to the ministry worker as well.  
  
"In conclusion to my last will and testament, I, Alphard Black, leave my remaining fortune of four thousand, eight hundred and sixty three galleons to my nephew, Sirius Black."  
  
Sirius blinked, his mouth wide open. He tried not to smile, knowing that in about a second, his cousins and his aunt would cry out in fury.  
  
And sure enough, "F-fo-four thousand?" Aunt Elladora stuttered. Bellatrix pointed a finger at Sirius accusingly, and stepped forward to the barrister, "Surely, my father would never leave his money to that - " she sputtered, obviously too angry to find words to describe Sirius.  
  
" – undeserving little traitor!" Narcissa finished for her sister. Sirius smiled, and rocked back on his heels. This was rather entertaining to him.  
  
His Aunt Elladora finally found her voice, and rounded on the ministry official, "There must be some mistake! My husband never spoke of this, he would never leave anything to that ingrate! Sirius Black does not deserve anything left of this family! He is dead to us!"  
  
The ministry worker eyed the screaming woman incredulously, "This is Alphard Black's last remaining will and testament. Are you questioning the law?"  
  
Aunt Elladora opened her mouth as if to say something, but thought better of it, and stepped back – her eyes shooting daggers at Sirius.  
  
"Grandma?" the little girl standing next to Andromeda said with wide eyes.  
  
"Keep your mouth shut, filthy half blood," Elladora snapped.  
  
"Mother!" exclaimed Andromeda, "That's your granddaughter you're yelling at!" Andromeda's husband was scowling at the bitter woman.  
  
"She's no more my family than that mudblood father of hers!" Elladora countered. The ministry worker retreated to his office, and Andromeda's daughter was crying – her eyes turning dark brown.  
  
Sirius clenched his teeth. At least his mother wasn't here – she was even worse than Aunt Elladora ever was.  
  
"We're leaving," Aunt Elladora finally declared, and her younger daughters followed in her wake.  
  
"It's about time," Sirius muttered under his breath. It definitely would have been worse if the whole family had come.  
  
Andromeda was breathing heavily, "I'm really sorry about my mother, she's - "   
  
"Just like my mother." Sirius interrupted, with a grin.  
  
Andromeda smiled, "I don't believe you've met my husband have you? He's a newscaster for a muggle TV station."  
  
The man standing next to her extended his hand to Sirius. "Ted Tonks," he said.  
  
Sirius shook his hand, and then looked down at the little girl. "And who's this lovely young lady?" he asked, kneeling down.  
  
Andromeda smiled at the girl, "This is my daughter, Nymphadora."  
  
Sirius turned to Nymphadora again, "How old are you?" he asked.  
  
Nymphadora held up six fingers.  
  
"She's a metamorphmagus," Andromeda continued. "I swear she was a brunette this morning, but…"  
  
"I can make myself shorter," Nymphadora said proudly.  
  
Sirius laughed, and said his goodbyes to them.  
  
As he watched them go, he briefly wondered if he should go back to school right away.   
  
*Of course not,* he thought with a grin.  
  
An extended leave from school and an inherited fortune – what ever should he do with it?  
  
~~~~~~  
  
AN: Dunno why, but I've taken a strange liking to this chapter. I just like the part where the ministry official runs and hides in his office.  
  
The coward. So! Reviews! Woohoo! 


	9. Influence

AN: Okay, I think ff.net was a little slow when I loaded chapter eight. When I checked it, it showed as not being there. So, if you aren't sure if you've read it, then make sure. That said, don't ask me about the chapter title. I just thought it sounded cool. It makes a little bit of sense... i think.  
  
~~  
  
"Four thousand, and how much?" James asked, unable to hide his astonishment.  
  
"These are galleons we're talking about, right?" Remus asked.  
  
Sirius nodded, smiling.  
  
"What are you going to spend it all on?" Peter asked.  
  
Sirius smiled even wider, "Already did."  
  
James's eyes widened, "On what?" he asked.  
  
"Remember how I kept talking about getting my own place when I got the money?" Sirius asked. James nodded.  
  
"Well, I just got the money."  
  
"You mean, you bought your own flat?" James asked.  
  
Sirius nodded.  
  
Remus frowned, "That's an expensive flat."  
  
"Well, the flat didn't exactly cost four thousand galleons."  
  
James turned back to Sirius. "I thought you said you spent all your money?"  
  
Sirius nodded. "Except for a couple hundred," he added, and brought his hands behind his head.   
  
Remus and James looked at each other questioningly. "Well, speak up." Remus said after Sirius remained silent.  
  
"What'd you spend the rest of it on?" James asked.  
  
Sirius smiled to himself, thoroughly proud of his choice. "A motorbike."  
  
James grinned, and Remus shook his head.  
  
"What?" Sirius asked.  
  
Remus sighed. "Why spend your money on that, if you already know how to Apparate?"  
  
Sirius shrugged, "For the heck of it."  
  
"I doubt it'll ever come in handy," Peter said.  
  
Sirius frowned, "Who said it had to be useful?" he replied defensively.   
  
"If you suddenly had four thousand galleons in your hands, you probably wouldn't do the rational thing, either."   
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
If the marauders could have a dormitory all to themselves, they would. But, unfortunately, their had always been five students to each dormitory. Therefore, it was their unhappy task to endure rooming with Antonin Dolohov.  
  
Usually, James or Sirius had something up their sleeve to keep him from even wanting to go in the dormitory – but other than that, with all the classes, and being in the same house – he was pretty much unavoidable. They hated him and he hated them, and they just happened to be in the same dormitory.  
  
But that didn't mean they couldn't make the best of it.  
  
"Quick, Moony, give him the sleeping charm so he doesn't wake up."  
  
Remus grinned as he took out his wand.  
  
James brought out his wand as well, "Now what should we do to the poor chap?"  
  
"Turn his hair pink."  
  
"No, brighter than that."  
  
"Give him whiskers."  
  
"Make his eyebrows grow long."  
  
"Then braid them."  
  
"Make his ears the size of pancakes."  
  
"No, bigger."  
  
James stood back to examine his work. "Excellent."  
  
Sirius was desperately trying not to laugh.  
  
"Oh, that's just awful," Remus said, stating the obvious.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus and Sirius were playing chess, James was trying to impress Lily with one of his Quidditch stories, and Peter was reading the Daily Prophet when Dolohov finally got back from the hospital wing.  
  
He stepped through the portrait hole, and James fell silent. Remus and Sirius doubled up with laughter – almost knocking over the chess set.  
  
Peter, however, didn't even look up from his paper.  
  
Dolohov scowled at Remus and Sirius, which made them laugh even harder, and then turned to the smirking James Potter.  
  
"You have no proof it was us." James said with a grin.  
  
"Is that a confession?" Dolohov spat.  
  
Lily was thoroughly bewildered.  
  
"Only if it's in writing." James replied casually.  
  
Dolohov clenched his teeth.  
  
"Sorry, don't have a quill on me." James said, grinning broadly. He turned to Lily. "Let's go for a walk."  
  
Lily just eyed him incredulously before letting him steer her out of the common room.  
  
Dolohov stomped over to one of the couches where Peter sat.  
  
Peter remained silent, hoping he wouldn't be questioned.  
  
"Did you have anything to do with this?" Dolohov demanded.  
  
Peter shook his head quickly from behind his paper.  
  
There was a moment of silence before Dolohov spoke again. "They're just a bunch of idiots trying to show off. Don't you agree?"  
  
Peter nodded.  
  
"Don't you talk at all?"  
  
Peter put down his paper. "Yeah."  
  
"So what's the paper saying?" Dolohov asked, nodding towards the Daily Prophet.  
  
"More muggle attacks, and all that rubbish." Peter replied casually.  
  
Dolohov laughed. "You know there are actually a bunch of dunderheads who think they can brink down the Dark Lord?"  
  
Peter frowned, "You don't think it's possible?"  
  
"Of course not. There are way too many death eaters."  
  
Peter's eyes widened. "You – you actually know some of them?"  
  
"Well, yeah. There's a whole bunch of people here who are ready to join as soon as they graduate. I won't mention any names because, well honestly, I don't trust you that much."  
  
Peter frowned. "Why not?"  
  
Dolohov snorted, "Look at who you're friends with!"  
  
Peter glanced over to Remus and Sirius, who were trying to impress a group of girls with some story they probably made up.  
  
"Yeah, well, I don't really like them much anyway," he said – although he wasn't sure it was entirely true.   
  
Wait.  
  
Of course it was.  
  
"Honestly?" Dolohov asked, a little surprised that Peter had turned around on his friends so quickly.  
  
Peter didn't find it hard to relate to Dolohov. After all, in the Marauders' first year, they had played just as many tricks on Peter. Only after they had found him useful for helping out with their stupid pranks did they finally lay off him.   
  
Peter nodded.  
  
~~  
  
AN: I don't know why I'm emphasizing Peter so much. He *is* a big part of the story, so he'll be showing up a lot. I know this was supposed to just be a little sequel to explain my first story, but I've been wanting to write this story for so long, I'm just putting EVERYTHING into it.  
  
So yes, it will be very long. Don't say I didn't warn you. *grins* Is a long story a good thing? I hope so.  
  
dragon princess nikki: Hehe, thank you for the huge truckload of reviews... they make me SO giddy, you really have no idea. And thank you for reading my poems (though pathetic) on fictionpress. I'm glad you noticed that I HAD to get rid of the map. How else were Fred and George gonna find it? Yeah, this whole entire story (except for the Remus/Rebecca part) is basically my interpretation of everything in HP. I'm dead serious, I have notes and lists and even a timeline on my desk. I'm a nerd, I know. 


	10. Breakfast and Quidditch

"Lovegood, you pig!" shouted several Ravenclaw girls.  
  
"Wha?" he attempted to ask through his mouthful of eggs.  
  
The guys laughed, and the girls just folded their arms, and scowled at the now empty platter of eggs.  
  
Rebecca turned around to the Gryffindor table, and was startled when she saw Remus Lupin turned around in his seat, smiling. "What's all this ruckus about?" he asked with a grin.  
  
Rebecca frantically tried to remember what she was going to ask as she felt her face redden. Finally finding her voice she asked, "Do you guys. er. have any eggs over there?"  
  
"Honestly, Becca," came the teasing voice of Sirius Black, "I didn't know you could eat so much."  
  
James grinned, "It's only been, what, five minutes since the breakfast came out?"  
  
Rebecca rolled her eyes. "It's not me! Stupid Lovegood over here ate them all."  
  
"Nope, sorry, don't have anymore," James said quickly, hiding their eggs from view.  
  
"Don't be such an idiot, Prongs," Remus said, grabbing the platter from James, and handing it to Rebecca.  
  
Rebecca smiled at him and turned back around to see the whole Ravenclaw house cheering on Lovegood to swallow the entire mouthful. Some were even timing him, to see how long it would take.  
  
After watching, Rebecca wasn't sure she was all that hungry anymore.  
  
Sure, Ravenclaws were intelligent, but that didn't mean they couldn't act stupid.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rebecca hadn't gotten far when she felt someone behind her touch her arm. She turned around, about to throw out some vicious insult to Lucius - or, that's who she thought it would be.  
  
She was surprised, however, to see that it was Remus. She was incredibly thankful she hadn't shot out the insult before turning around.  
  
"How are you?" he asked cheerfully. A bit too cheerfully.  
  
"How am I?" she replied, a bit startled.  
  
Remus's smile faded slightly, and his eyes darkened. "With what happened - at Christmas."  
  
Rebecca stopped walking, and let the rest of the students pass by her. Remus stopped as well, watching her eyes, which she lowered to the ground. "Fine, I guess."  
  
Remus sighed. He knew she probably didn't want to talk about it. He nodded. The last of the students and professors left through the doors.  
  
The two stood in silence in the now empty Great Hall. The marble floor seemed to stretch so much farther now that nobody was inside. The walls reached high, and the ceiling held their echoes still.  
  
Remus was determined to say something - anything. He couldn't stay silent as he watched her suffer on the inside. He looked back up at her. "Are you sure you're okay?"  
  
She nodded, shutting out his words.  
  
Remus sighed painfully. He laid a hand on her shoulder, and brought her chin up. "Becca," he whispered.  
  
She choked back a sob, and felt herself pulled into his arms. Feeling empty and shattered, she wept on his shoulder.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Who ever heard of a Ravenclaw going to watch a game between Slytherin and Gryffindor?  
  
Rebecca sat between Remus and Sirius, with Lily on the other side. They had no idea where Peter was, but they didn't give much thought to it - mainly because the game was about to start.  
  
"So," came the booming voice of Sirius from beside Rebecca.  
  
Remus turned his head to see that Sirius was grinning at both of them, "What?" he asked.  
  
Sirius's eyes narrowed in mock suspicion, and the grin that had appeared spread even wider. "What's this thing between you two?"  
  
Neither of the two had a response at hand, so both turned to one another for an answer, which only made Sirius laugh. "Oh come on, you've got to admit it's pretty obvious." Lily was grinning knowingly.  
  
"What's obvious?" Remus asked incredulously, but Rebecca caught a hint of a smile in his eyes. She laughed nervously, and before anything else could happen, the Quidditch game started - thank Merlin.  
  
The cheery voice of Dorcas Meadowes filled the pitch as she started the commentaries.  
  
"What a perfect, sunny day for a nice, brutal Quidditch match. We've got some enthusiastic cheering going on for both Gryffindor and Slytherin teams." This brought a roar from all sides of the pitch.  
  
"On the Gryffindor team we have Chasers Emmaline Vance, Antonin Dolohov, and Edgar Bones." A mixture of cheers from the red and gold side, and boos from the green and silver side.  
  
"For Beaters we have Gideon and Fabian Prewett - both of them damn good- looking." This brought McGonagall to her feet, and all the Gryffindor girls screaming like mad.  
  
Dorcas was laughing now, "And finally, Sturgis Podmore as keeper, and everyone's favorite seeker, James Potter!" James grinned at the Gryffindor crowd, and Lily cheered at the top of her lungs. Rebecca was surprised Lily could actually scream that loud.  
  
A few people pointed out that the whole team was full of seventh years - not that they had all joined the team at the same time. Sturgis had just been made keeper this year, and Gideon and Fabian had been on the team only since their fifth years. It would definitely be quite some try-out next Quidditch season, with every single position open.  
  
"And to the Slytherin team. We have Chasers Lucius Malfoy, Narcissa Black, and newcomer Regulus Black." Slytherin cheers were never as loud as their insults, so they were easily drown out by the Gryffindors.  
  
"We also have Crabbe and Goyle as Beaters, Rodolphus Lestrange as Keeper and Severus Snape as seeker."  
  
Dorcas Meadowes announced this with such an utter lack of enthusiasm it almost sounded sarcastic. It must have been, because she grinned after saying it. The Gryffindor cheers for the commentator mixed with the Slytherin cheers for their team. It was strange hearing both houses cheering at the same time.  
  
And, the Quaffle was up, the Bludgers were set loose, and the Snitch had already vanished in the midst of the starting game.  
  
"It's Vance with the Quaffle, she passes to Dolohov who passes back to - but no - the Quaffle is intercepted by Malfoy. Malfoy passes to Black who passes to her brother who - Ouch! Nice hit by Fabian Prewett." Fabian saluted Dorcas before turning back to the game  
  
"And the Quaffle goes to Dolohov who passes to Bones - oh, Goyle smacks a bludger to Vance, and Crabbe aims one at Fabian. Those stupid ba - And it's Bones with the Quaffle. He races down the pitch toward keeper Lestrange, and - stops?" Indeed, Edgar Bones *had* stopped right in front of the goal because to the right of him was James Potter grinning like a Cheshire cat - with the snitch struggling in his hand. The Gryffindor side nearly exploded.  
  
"I knew Potter was good, but I had no idea he was *that* good!" Dorcas attempted to say above the roar of the Gryffindor crowd. "Only three minutes into the game - it's got to be a record, or something!"  
  
Among many other things, this is what made James Potter "The James Potter". But his school Quidditch triumphs were all but forgotten when it came to the *real* way his name became so well known.  
  
Despite how amazing that day was, he wasn't remembered for it. Rather, he was remembered for the tragedy of his life instead of what he had accomplished.  
  
But for the time being, he was known as the best bloody seeker anyone knew.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: a little short, I know. Basically, this chapter was just introducing a TON of characters here. Hope you liked it! Even if you didn't, review! *sneeze* 


	11. War in the Lake

AN: I just found out I've been spelling Emmeline's name wrong this whole time. *grumble, grumble* Hugs and jelly beans to all my reviewers!  
  
~~~  
  
April approached, and before the students could even start counting the days, it was gone. Everyone's favorite pass-time was to reenact James's victory - that is, until the Hufflepuffs won the Quidditch Cup by default.  
  
With only one beater and two chasers (Madame Pomfrey absolutely forbid letting Fabian and Emmeline play with their injuries) Gryffindor was forced to forfeit, and so the Cup went to Hufflepuff, who had beat Ravenclaw and Slytherin in January.  
  
Edgar Bones was always trying to avoid his Hufflepuff sister, Amelia, who never missed an opportunity to playfully brag in his face. The two had been constant rivals, and Amelia loved giving Edgar a hard time - even though she was a year younger. She, of course, found the Quidditch defeat especially amusing, and continued to pledge her apologies that Edgar wasn't suffering in the hospital wing as well.  
  
After April passed, it was, of course, May. It was a Saturday, and the Gryffindors (and of course, a few people from other houses) couldn't seem to find anything better to do than sit at the edge of the lake, and throw rocks at the Giant Squid. Lily, Amelia, Becca, Dorcas and (the newly recovered) Emmeline all sat on the water's edge with their feet in the water, and James, Sirius, Gideon, Fabian and Peter were throwing things in the lake to see how angry the squid could get before throwing a fit.  
  
"I'm bored," James announced while throwing another rock into the water.  
  
Remus, who was sitting against a rock watching the water ripple as the squid moved around, gave a huge yawn, "I think we all are, Prongs."  
  
Fabian tried throwing with his left arm (since his right arm had just barely recovered) but the rock didn't get far, and it nearly hit one of the girls.  
  
"Oops," he said quietly as they turned around and glared at the whole lot of them. Sirius smiled and waved.  
  
"I think they could use a little cheering up," James said out of the side of his mouth.  
  
Gideon nodded, "I'd say they look far too dry."  
  
Peter sniggered, and Remus sighed. "You're not getting me involved," he said lazily.  
  
James and Sirius glanced at each other and grinned, "Oh yes you are!" they said as they grabbed each of his arms, and pulled him up. He huffed angrily, but smiled as he gave in.  
  
The group of them started to walk over to where the girls were sitting, but the girls watched as James and Sirius broke formation, and grabbed Peter (who was, by far, the smallest of the group) and tossed him easily into the water.  
  
The girls got to their feet (a few applauded) as Sirius puffed out his chest proudly and took a sweeping bow.  
  
This was, of course, a big mistake on his part. Sure enough, before he could straighten up, James and Remus grabbed an arm each, pulled him backwards and then spun him round to face the lake so fast, he lost his balance and fell face first into the water with a resounding splash.  
  
Emmeline, Dorcas, and a few other girls ran towards the water, squealing loudly, and screeched as Gideon and Fabian shoved them into the water as well.  
  
Lily, Amelia and Rebecca backed away from the water to avoid getting wet, but not long after, James approached them innocently.  
  
"Miss Evans," he greeted Lily cordially.  
  
Lily's eyes snapped to his and narrowed as she stepped slowly away.  
  
"Mr. Potter," she acknowledged warily.  
  
"Can I borrow you for a minute? Moony there has an Arithmancy question for you - something off the exam paper, so he says."  
  
He watched Lily glance over to where Remus stood; he appeared to be watching them intently, but with a small grin. It was the distraction James was waiting for. Without hesitation, he scooped her up and threw her over his shoulders, and walked into the water with her pounding her fists on his back. Remus burst out laughing.  
  
Edgar Bones pushed his sister in, and Rebecca stepped to her left to avoid the war that was breaking loose.  
  
She did not notice Remus until she bumped right into him. She looked up at his face, and took a step back when she saw he was smiling deviously.  
  
"No!" she protested, but before he could do anything, Gideon and Fabian pushed them both into the lake.  
  
James was sputtering and splashing around blindly because Lily had his glasses in her hand. Sirius brought his wand out and started shooting the oddest hexes around, but after having her hair turned purple, Dorcas summoned his wand with her own, and threw it as far as she could into the lake.  
  
This seemed to be the last straw for the giant squid, who sent up massive plumes of water into the air in frustration, and drifted away towards the other shore.  
  
McGonagall stormed down the slope to where half the school was fighting, and when she saw the scene, she threw her hands into the air hopelessly, and turned back around muttering something about "children."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Lily brought out her wand to dry her hair. She, Rebecca, Dorcas, and Emmeline trudged up the slopes towards the castle, their robes dripping everywhere.  
  
Emmeline turned to Lily. "Where are you going to stay after you graduate?" she asked.  
  
Lily shrugged, and turned to Rebecca.  
  
"I don't know, either," she confessed.  
  
Suddenly, Emmeline brightened, "That's brilliant!"  
  
Lily frowned, "What is?"  
  
Emmeline was jumping up and down, "You two can be roommates!"  
  
Lily and Becca turned to each other, and their faces brightened at the thought. It was definitely a possibility.  
  
"That'd be great!" Becca exclaimed. Lily smiled and nodded excitedly.  
  
Dorcas sighed as she curled her hair with the tip of her wand. "I'm going to marry Sirius Black," she said dreamily.  
  
There was a moment of silence as the other girls wondered if she was actually being serious - and then they all burst out laughing, except for Dorcas.  
  
"No, really, I am!" she said indignantly.  
  
Emmeline finally managed to contain her laughter, "You can go ahead and try, but I can't deny I have my doubts."  
  
Lily grinned. "The day Sirius Black gets married is the day muggles start Apparating everywhere."  
  
~~  
  
There. A nice little chapter full of nonsense. Whatcha think?  
  
Woohoo! Next chapter they finally graduate! *dances around the computer, and runs into a wall*  
  
Hey, when did that wall get there? *frowns* 


	12. At King's Cross

Woohoo!  
  
DragonPrincessNikki: That's a good thing you recognized Dolohov. That means you were paying attention while reading OotP. He was one of the Death eaters in the Dep. Of Mysteries at the end.  
  
Reviewers make the world go round! *and I'm sure there's a bit of physics in there, too!*  
  
Disclaimer: Rowling, don't hurt me. Fanfiction is not a crime. AND IF YOU DECIDE TO KILL LUPIN IN BOOK SIX OR SEVEN. . . *face turns purple* Luv ya, JK!  
  
~~  
  
N.E.W.T.'s were hanging over the students like a storm cloud. Some tried to make a joke of it, saying it stood for "Never Ever Wake a Teacher" or "Nobody Ever Wanted This".  
  
Some however (namely Remus) saw it for what it was - the ultimate test from hell.  
  
James and Sirius often would creep up on him in the library, constantly reminding him that he was spending more time reading than breathing. The truth was, Remus had taken on the impossible task of re-learning seven years of Transfiguration, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Charms, Arithmancy and Potions all in one week.  
  
It wasn't surprising that James and Sirius didn't study at all (perfectly confident that they didn't need to) and had taken to putting Adhesive Charms to the pages of his books. This had gotten them a nasty set of detentions from Madame Pince, seeing as the books where in fact the library's and not Remus's.  
  
"I don't know why I put up with you two," Remus said irritably, his hair out of place and his eyes heavy with sleep deprivation.  
  
Sirius looked shocked, "I thought that would have been obvious," he said.  
  
James smiled cheerily. "Because we're so loveable."  
  
Graduation was especially amusing with all the Slytherins walking into the Great Hall with curly hair. This was due to the Curling Cupcakes James had invented, and snuck into the Slytherin common room. Sirius had caught Snape in a duel, and Snivellus had definitely come off worse (having no eyebrows and a nose resembling that of an elephant's.)  
  
Remus (after finishing his N.E.W.T's and loosening up a bit, thanks to Padfoot slipping Ogden's Old Firewhiskey into his drink) had somehow found a way to charm the suits of armor to walk on their own and wreak havoc in the classrooms - therefore resulting in the absence of lessons on the last day of school.  
  
Peter didn't seem to be up to causing mayhem at all.  
  
Dumbledore was cheerful, but nevertheless gave words of wisdom for the seventh years to be wary of the evil that lurked outside of the school walls.  
  
Today was the last day of living at Hogwarts. The last day of pranks. The last day of teachers eyeing you like hawks. The last day of Filch eagerly throwing out detentions every which way.  
  
As of tomorrow, the protection would be lifted.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus stepped off the train at King's Cross station with an air of determination and confusion.  
  
*What in the world am I doing?* he asked himself.  
  
"Oi! Rebecca!" he called out suddenly - surprising even himself. *So THAT'S who I'm looking for, eh?*  
  
She turned around and stopped, her silky brown hair falling across her shoulder. When she saw it was Remus who had called out, she looked a bit startled and she smiled slightly.  
  
"You called?" she replied brightly, while stepping forward.  
  
Remus opened his mouth as if to say something, but then suddenly remembered he had no idea what he was doing. Why *had* he called her back?  
  
Because she was leaving? Because he might not see her again? He shook his head - of course he would see her. such a melodramatic thing to think. Stupid, Moony, stupid.  
  
Rebecca cocked her head to the side, her eyes twinkling with curiosity, causing Remus to stop mentally insulting himself. He wished he would just say what he wanted to say. Or, even better, he wished she would say something instead.  
  
Eventually, she did, but it didn't help much. "Are you okay?" she asked, noticing the deer-in-headlights look etched into his face. He nodded quickly.  
  
As he looked back into her chocolate brown eyes, he finally realized what he wanted. His heart sped up as he tentatively reached a hand out toward hers. How could Prongs and Padfoot speak of girls so lightly? It was torture. He felt as if he would die if he didn't kiss her, she was so close.  
  
Lucius, the prat, had to walk over like the king of the world and grab her by the shoulder. She turned around, her eyes narrowed, but Lucius only extended his arm around her shoulder.  
  
Rebecca shifted her shoulders uncomfortably - trying to break free.  
  
He gave a quick glance to Remus, a look almost full of pity. "I'm sorry, were you talking to her?" he asked sympathetically. "Because I'm quite sure she didn't want to listen."  
  
If only it were the full moon, Remus could rip him apart. At the moment, that was his intention. Without a second thought as to what he was doing, he brought back his fist and slammed it against the side of Malfoy's jaw.  
  
"Oy!" he heard someone call out. It was probably James.  
  
But before he could deliver the second blow, a fist came slamming into the side of his head from the right. He turned groggily to see Severus Snape, fuming.  
  
It must have been James who had called out, because moments later, he was there to punch Snape in the stomach. This gave time for Lucius to recover and fight back against Remus. Sirius finally came in to keep Malfoy off of him - causing onlookers (both muggle and magical) to step back.  
  
Remus was barely aware of someone pulling him back, but when he did, he turned around to see it was a muggle policeman. He laughed nervously, aware that his lip was bleeding. He also noticed that the fight had doubled in numbers.  
  
Gideon, Fabian and Edgar had joined at some point, and Dolohov and Regulus were sporting nosebleeds as well. Sirius moved out of the way as his mother came running up to grab Regulus away from the scene.  
  
She shot a nasty look at Sirius and muttered, "Filthy scum, dragging my son into it." She seemed completely ignorant of the fact that Sirius was her son as well.  
  
Somehow (probably a well-hidden memory charm from James) the guard let the lot of them off, murmuring something that sounded like "Merry Christmas" as he walked away back to his post.  
  
Remus looked around expectantly, but by now, Rebecca was already gone.  
  
He groaned as he contemplated how he had made a complete mess of things that were once incredibly simple.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Ok, ok. I know Remus was I N C R E D I B L Y out of character here. he would never start a fight. But I just L O V E writing about fights. They make the story interesting. Hope it wasn't *that* off.  
  
Was it? 


	13. The Order of the Phoenix

AN: Woohoo! They finally graduated! Yeah! Guess what comes next? If you have no clue what comes next, please read the chapter title. Does it make sense now?  
  
Disclaimer: I am in no way in possession of Harry Potter, and I am not responsible for his actions in later books. Heck, he blew up in Dumbledore's office, and that was only Book 5! I wonder how bad his emotional outburst will be in the last one! Good luck, Rowling. *wink*  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So this is the flat, is it?" Remus said appraisingly.  
  
Sirius nodded. "But that's not the best part."  
  
Sirius brought out the motorbike, and Remus and Peter just stood there with their mouths hanging open. It was amazing he could afford something so. . . beautiful.  
  
James beamed like a little boy at Christmas, "Padfoot, old buddy, old pal?"  
  
Sirius grinned, "Go ahead."  
  
James nearly jumped. Remus couldn't help but laugh at the sight. Before he could say anything, however, he felt something heavy rest on his shoulder.  
  
It was an owl - holding a letter. Even stranger, it looked just like one of the school owls he had used once or twice. He had been out of school for only two weeks, what would the Headmaster want with him now?  
  
He opened it, and found that it was from the school - but it had absolutely nothing to do with Hogwarts.  
  
Mr. Lupin,  
  
I am sure you are fully aware of the dangers of the Dark Lord and the trouble he has caused in the world thus far. It is our task to recruit those who have shown extraordinary skills and qualities both in their magical abilities, but also in the strength of their character. It is with pride that I inform you that you are one of my few chosen pupils to join the forces of witches and wizards devoted to restoring peace both in the magical and non-magical world.  
  
If you feel you are ready to fight, we will hold a meeting to discuss the matters further on August 1st at 7:00 pm sharp in my office at the school.  
  
Albus Dumbledore.  
  
Remus suddenly became aware that all eyes were on him, and that James hadn't flown away yet.  
  
"It's from Dumbledore isn't it?" Sirius said. James glanced at Sirius, and then Remus - his face showing complete astonishment.  
  
Peter's face was unreadable and blank.  
  
"How did you know?" Remus asked.  
  
Sirius walked up to him taking long, swift strides, and snatched the letter, his eyes quickly moving back and forth.  
  
"Yeah," he said as his eyes registered the words on the parchment, "Dumbledore sent me the same letter."  
  
Remus stared at him numbly.  
  
"Of course it had my name on the top and everything, but other than that. . . "  
  
James got off the motorbike, and read the letter over Sirius's shoulder. "Me too," he announced after skimming through it.  
  
They turned to Peter, who nodded silently, staring off into the sky.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was obvious that Dumbledore's office was only a temporary place to meet. Nobody in their right mind would hold regular meetings in here, seeing as it was only a small circular room. The Charms classroom would have been a better choice, but, of course, they wouldn't hold top secret meetings that discussed the actions of Voldemort in a room that anyone could walk into.  
  
There were about twenty people who had apparently been recruited by Dumbledore, and about half of them were familiar faces.  
  
"Lily!" James cried out.  
  
Lily turned around and brightened. "James!" she squealed.  
  
Remus noticed there were many people from school here. Sturgis Podmore, Fabian and Gideon Prewett and Edgar Bones were talking with Dorcas Meadowes, Emmaline Vance, and a witch and wizard he recognized who had graduated a when he was only a fourth year. Also, standing in the back, his head nearly scraping the ceiling was the gamekeeper, Hagrid.  
  
Peter rocked back and forth on his heels, looking slightly bored.  
  
Sirius strode up to Dorcas and extended his hand in greeting. She shook his hand and blushed slightly. Sirius, however, was perfectly calm and comfortable. "Nice to see me, I'm sure," he said with a broad grin.  
  
She smiled awkwardly, and let out a sound that must have been a cross between a giggle and a reply.  
  
Lily was hugging James so hard, he must have been choking. Just when Remus thought James was about to die of suffocation, she let go.  
  
Dumbledore cleared his throat - which, for some reason, always proved to be an effective way of getting everyone's attention.  
  
"Thank you for coming today. Welcome to the first meeting of the Order of the Phoenix. Catchy name, isn't it?" Dumbledore winked.  
  
"As you can see, I have brought some of my freshest graduates, and a few people they might not recognize."  
  
"Let's see. We have here, Marlene McKinnon," Dumbledore began, indicating a middle-aged witch with a motherly smile.  
  
"Hmmm, oh, and my good friend, Alastor Moody," a rough-looking wizard in the back gave an appreciative grunt.  
  
"Let's see, Frank and Alice Longbottom, who I believe just finished their Auror training this July?" The witch and wizard Remus had vaguely recognized nodded, smiling at Dumbledore.  
  
"Benjy Fenwick," a burly wizard that looked no more than twenty nodded silently. "Dedalus Diggle," he indicated an excited wizard in a violet top hat. "Caradoc Dearborn," a short wizard with dark hair grinned broadly and waved. "Rubeus Hagrid," the giant man winked at the younger graduates. "Oh, and how could we miss Elphias Doge?"  
  
Dedalus Diggle chuckled, "His hat's almost as bad as mine!"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Anybody have their OotP handy? Well, if you take a look at pages 173 and 174, you'll see all these people there. Isn't that cool?  
  
Unless, of course, you already knew that. *wink*  
  
I used the small details like Elphias Doge having a weird-looking hat, and stuff. I just thought you might want to know where these pages are, because the stuff that's said on those two pages is pretty much half of what this story's gonna be. A little depressing, I know.  
  
Hey! I just noticed something! On page 174, Dorcas and Sirius are actually next to each other in the picture! Ha! 


	14. Blackmail

AN: Well, here it is. A chapter completely devoted to Peter. I don't necessarily like the idiot, it's just that he's such a complex character, I can't *help* but write so much about him.  
  
Hope you like it. Next chapter will be very rushed - just a warning.  
  
AHHH! Voldemort makes his big appearance!  
  
*shuts up*  
  
~~  
  
Peter still lived in his mother's house, and she gave him little time to contemplate the things happening in his life with all the chores he had to do. The only time he had to rest was when he was sleeping - and even then, he couldn't find any relaxation or comfort with all the thoughts swimming in his head.  
  
Peter lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling, Antonin Dolohov's words echoing his mind, "a bunch of dunderheads who think they can bring down the Dark Lord."  
  
Of course, he couldn't help remembering the letter Dumbledore had sent him proclaiming he had "strength of character" and asking if he was ready to fight.  
  
Was this really a war? Of course it was - people were dying already. Well, if it was a war, he supposed he should be on the right side.  
  
But, he asked himself, what exactly was the right side? The side with the best odds, or the side worth fighting for? He remembered the look on James's face when he had lost his parents, and the pain that he, Peter, had felt as he watched his friend suffer in agony and grief.  
  
He also remembered the irony. The Potters died because they had chosen the wrong side, which, in turn, motivated James to fight against it with Dumbledore.  
  
Really, maybe they should have listened to the Death Eaters, and nothing would have gone wrong.  
  
The sharp looks from his friends when he had tried to voice this out loud were so accusing, he couldn't help but shut up about it.  
  
Were they really his friends if they wouldn't let him speak up for himself? It took him four years of 'inner soul-searching' to find out that he was a rat, and then 'harness' that inner animal, only so Remus wouldn't have such a hard time. What did he, Peter, gain from it?  
  
But then he remembered how it had only taken James and Sirius two years to master the animagus spell, and how they had waited tirelessly for him to figure it out. They never left him at the full moon until he could go with them. That made them true friends.  
  
Strength of character, that's what Dumbledore was talking about. Sure they had character, but would that save them when it came to facing death?  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
As if as an answer to all his problems, a letter came the next day, providing Peter with an alternative.  
  
If you're still interested, meet with the rest of us at the Malfoy Manor August 20th, 11 pm. No questions. Don't make a big scene when (and if) you do come. Be sure to think it over first, and don't even think about bringing the whole Ministry with you, it'll just make a mess of things.  
  
~~~Antonin Dolohov  
  
Peter held the note in his hands a long time.  
  
Sure, he was ready to fight - but maybe he didn't have to.  
  
Forget strength of character - at least he wasn't a dunderhead, and wouldn't be killed for it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
All those years - the awful things he had done. The awful things that had happened under his orders. Despite the apparent lack of mercy the man had, Peter had always imagined Lord Voldemort to look more - human.  
  
However, he looked like a tall, pale. . . creature. . . with an unnaturally smooth face, and long, spidery fingers that looked as if they could completely wrap around your throat.  
  
His eyes were merely red slits in which to see through. The narrowed, slitted pupils made him seem like a cat, watching them imperiously as if they were all mice that were alive only at his mercy of not killing them.  
  
So, naturally, Peter could not help but cower back in fear when those eyes rested upon him.  
  
"Who is this, Dolohov?" he said as if the mere sight of Peter were an annoyance to him.  
  
"A recruit."  
  
Peter felt incredibly out of place.  
  
The Dark Lord appraised him, and Peter noticed a severe dislike already even though he hadn't said anything.  
  
"What good is he?" Voldemort asked coldly.  
  
Dolohov turned to Peter, and that's when Peter realized he should have come up with a reason why he shouldn't be killed on the spot. He racked his brains for any knowledge he might have that these people did not.  
  
Dumbledore? Nobody knew anything about Dumbledore, let alone him.  
  
Sirius? Remus? James? Panic rose in his chest. He couldn't.  
  
And plus, what use were they to the Dark Lord?  
  
Names ran through his head. Peter was aware that Voldemort was watching him intently - yet, almost as if he could look right through him.  
  
Moody, Hagrid, Fenwick, McKinnon, Longbottom - were these names of any use? They were just people in the Order.  
  
"The Order?" came the high cruel voice of Voldemort in intrigue.  
  
Apparently, he could see through Peter as much as it seemed.  
  
"The Order of the Phoenix," he replied numbly.  
  
"Are you in the Order?" he asked, the dislike quickly being replaced by interest.  
  
Peter looked around him. All the Death Eaters had their masks off. Snape? Lucius? Regulus? Crabbe? Goyle? Rodolphus?  
  
Peter Pettigrew?  
  
Wormtail?  
  
Voldemort knew exactly what Peter was thinking even if he wasn't exactly sure himself.  
  
"Yes, familiar faces aren't they? A bit of a shock to you, is it - knowing how many people are here?" Voldemort smiled, if it were at all possible, but his smile was full of evil satisfaction instead of joy.  
  
There was no happiness here.  
  
"I'm afraid there are more than you may think. Four hundred without counting the odds and ends," The Dark Lord smiled again, and there was no satisfaction in the smile this time - only a sort of anticipation at what he was about to say next.  
  
"I am afraid you know too much by now, however. Can't you see? We've taken our masks off for you." Snape grinned maliciously, and Lucius was chuckling.  
  
The Dark Lord, however, was having his own fun, and didn't need to turn around and see his followers wearing the same smile he was wearing now. "Do you honestly think, that after revealing so much to you, we'd let you go? If we find you to be, in fact, obsolete, we will kill you."  
  
Now Peter knew why Voldemort was smiling, and why the Death Eaters were having so much fun with this. He was trapped in a corner between death and betrayal, and it was entertaining to them.  
  
Voldemort's eyes set on Peter again, full of satisfaction and determination. "Now, I ask you again, are you in the Order?"  
  
Peter closed his eyes, shutting out the voices of James, Sirius, and Remus screaming with horror when they found death staring them in the face.  
  
He swallowed his regret, and nodded. "I will be, my Lord."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
There ya go. He's a git now, and I'm allowed to hate him. Yay! *dances the funky chicken* So, yeah.  
  
I like reviews. They make me very happy.  
  
Ok. I have a humongous confession. I'm currently on chapter 21.  
  
Do you want me just to update EVERYTHING all at once? I mean, it's easier only updating a little bit at a time, because if I get writer's block or can't write for some reason, I can still keep updating.  
  
Or do ya just want the chapters all at once?  
  
Oh, and did you like chapter 14? *smiles nervously* 


	15. An Early Proposal

Author's Note: Note the chapter title, EARLY proposal. This chapter is rushed, but I had to do it, so, please don't hate me *smiles nervously*  
  
BIG FAT DISCLAIMER THAT IS INCREDIBLY NECESSARY: Not only are these not my characters, but there is a passage that I DID NOT WRITE! JK Rowling wrote it. It's copyrighted, don't give me credit for it. I have a mortal fear of lawyers. *runs and hides*  
  
~~~  
  
"Photographs?" Emmaline Vance asked incredulously.  
  
Caradoc Dearborn cocked his head to the side, "Are you meaning to tell me, Dumbledore, that we met here for photographs?"  
  
Dumbledore nodded cheerfully, and left the room.  
  
"I thought we were actually going to do something useful for once," Moody growled.  
  
Mrs. McKinnon smiled soothingly, "There's nothing wrong with taking a few pictures, now is there?"  
  
"Certainly not," Frank Longbottom declared. His wife nodded, "It makes it. official." She added a friendly smile as Dumbledore walked back into the room they had assembled themselves in.  
  
Peter really wished they'd rather not make it official. Everything seemed to be so official nowadays. So binding. He felt obligated to absolutely everything he contributed to.  
  
Remus was smiling, positively cheery.  
  
Sirius was tirelessly flirting with Dorcas, and James and Lily were rolling their eyes at him.  
  
"Everyone ready?" Dumbledore asked, bringing out the enormous camera.  
  
Everybody got into position, gave their brightest smiles, and waved at the camera.  
  
FLASH.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Original Order of the Phoenix," growled Moody. "Found it last night when I was looking for my spare invisibility cloak, seeing as Podmore hasn't had the manners to return my best one. Thought people might like to see it."  
  
Harry took the photograph. A small crowd of people, some waving at him, others lifting their glasses, looked back up at him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
FLASH.  
  
Sirius blinked incessantly. "Oy, that was bright."  
  
Edgar Bones snorted, "Honestly, it wasn't that bad."  
  
Sirius held his arms out in front of him, and started running around blindly.  
  
"Oh, stop complaining," Dorcas said with a sigh.  
  
Sirius stopped when he ran into a tall man with a long white beard. "Oh, sorry Dumble - " He fell silent when he realized it wasn't Dumbledore.  
  
The man eyed him strangely before finally saying, "No worries, I have young people bumping into me constantly." The old man gazed at the wall and stroked his beard as if deep in thought, and Sirius slipped away to avoid conversation.  
  
Sirius walked over to Remus quickly. "Er. have you the slightest clue who that is?" he asked, indicating the tall man who was still gazing at the wall nonchalantly. Remus shrugged.  
  
"That," came a booming voice from behind them. They both turned around and saw Dumbledore watching the man as well. "is my dear brother, Aberforth," he said.  
  
"Best to avoid him if you can," he added with a smile at the two.  
  
They nodded, and took his advice.  
  
"Are you two married, my dears?" Mrs. McKinnon asked James and Lily.  
  
Lily opened her mouth as if to say something, and James gave her a sidelong glance. Abandoning her attempt to use words, Lily shook her head.  
  
"Oh," Mrs. McKinnon said, laughing to herself. "So sorry."  
  
James frowned thoughtfully. "We should be, though."  
  
Lily started, and turned to James, astonished. "We should?" she asked dazedly.  
  
"Yep," he said confidently.  
  
Lily blinked, and the corners of her mouth twitched. "Are you proposing?" she asked him surreptitiously.  
  
James turned to her slowly. "Should I?" he asked her casually.  
  
"Er."  
  
"What's this?" Sirius asked, noticing James's intent look, and the look of blank surprise on Lily's face.  
  
"Sounds like a wedding to me," Remus said, smiling slightly.  
  
Sirius beamed. "Wedding? I love weddings! Free drinks!"  
  
"Er." Lily seemed to be frozen, and James wasn't looking away from her - the smallest trace of a grin fluttering across his face.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"For heaven's sake, Lily, you're only eighteen!" Rebecca exclaimed, throwing her hands into the air.  
  
"I thought you'd be happy for me," Lily mumbled miserably.  
  
Rebecca dropped her hands to her side and smiled. "I am," she said teasingly.  
  
She plopped onto the couch next to Lily. "So, he just flat out asked you? Right there?" she asked.  
  
Lily shook her head with a funny sort of half amused, half bewildered look on her face. "No, someone brought it up, and. well. I guess he sort of - egged it on."  
  
Becca snorted.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes. "And then Sirius started talking about free drinks, and Remus started saying that we should decide on a date for it, even though I hadn't even said yes yet!"  
  
"Did you?" Becca asked excitedly.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes again, "How could I not? Sirius would die of heartbreak because he didn't get any free drinks!"  
  
"Oh, I don't know about that," Becca said thoughtfully, "He'd probably bring drinks anyway, even if there was no occasion."  
  
Lily laughed, and Becca continued her interrogation. "So, do you know when it's going to be yet?"  
  
Lily glanced down, avoiding her eyes. "Well, you know James. He doesn't want to wait for thirty years."  
  
"How soon?" Becca asked, a hint of worry creeping into her voice.  
  
Lily bit her lip. "Now, don't jump all over me," she began.  
  
"How soon?"  
  
Lily swallowed guiltily. "Next week?"  
  
Becca looked as if she'd been hit in the face by a hippogriff.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Everything was prepared in a rush, although nobody knew why they felt they had to rush it.  
  
Lily was fretting over bridesmaid's dresses and magical streamers and doves and food and (much to Sirius's delight) free drinks and where oh where to put them?  
  
Lily jumped when two hands slipped around her waist. She turned around and heaved a relieved sigh when she saw it was James.  
  
"Sorry," she muttered. "Just a bit jumpy, you know? What, with all this planning to do, and people to invite, and decorations, and arrangements, and invitations - oh wait, I already said that, didn't I?"  
  
Lily kept rambling on and James smirked. "Just calm down," he told her.  
  
She smiled wistfully, "You're really nutters, you know that?" she said conversationally.  
  
James nodded. "Hope you don't mind."  
  
Lily got back to the work she was doing and James frowned. "We can postpone it if it's too soon."  
  
"No, it's alright."  
  
"You're not okay with it, I can tell."  
  
"I've already told people the date, we can't just go changing it!" she cried, exasperated.  
  
James nodded.  
  
Lily dropped her shoulders and laid her head on James's shoulder. "I'm sorry, it's just. oh, I never thought it would happen this soon. I'm just so. young!"  
  
James smiled slightly, his eyes dancing, "In case you haven't noticed, so am I."  
  
Lily gave a frustrated sigh. Why did he have to make a joke out of everything? It really was frustrating when she tried talking to him, and he was laughing his head off.  
  
She smiled suddenly, and brought her head up. "You know my parents would have a fit about this!" Her smiled faded slightly when she realized what she'd said.  
  
James nodded thoughtfully as he remembered his own parents. "So would mine," he said, forcing a smile - for her sake.  
  
Lily shook her head, "They'd be happy, though."  
  
James turned to look at her. Her eyes were as green as ever, and filled with so much love. Love for him. He marveled at how anyone could love him, but then told himself not to complain.  
  
He smiled, "Let's hope so."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Is Peter coming?" James asked with a note of anxiety in his voice. He was nervous, but constantly reminded himself he was getting married - which was a good thing. It was supposed to be a happy day, but he couldn't help feeling jumpy.  
  
Sirius scratched his head absently. "Actually, he said he couldn't. He didn't say why. I'm sure it was unavoidable - he would have come to his friend's wedding if he'd had the choice."  
  
James narrowed his eyes, "I don't know. He has seemed a bit dodgy lately. Do you think he might know something we don't?"  
  
Remus and Sirius looked at each other momentarily, and then eyed James incredulously. Remus was the one to speak up. "Wormtail? Honestly, Prongs, are you alright? This is Peter we're talking about." He turned to Sirius. "You didn't spike the punch, did you?"  
  
Sirius threw up his hands. "I would never!" he cried in mock innocence. James ran his hand through his hair, and with a sigh of frustration, walked back to the mirror to flatten it out again.  
  
"Sirius, do you think you could find Lily? I don't think it's natural to take this long to get ready," James said without looking away from the mirror.  
  
Sirius spun around dramatically, "She did come, didn't she?" James finally looked away from the mirror and his eyes widened in panic. Sirius laughed, "Don't worry, I know she's here - she's just a little superstitious about seeing you before the wedding. I'll go find her." He was still laughing when he left.  
  
As Sirius left the room, Remus went to follow him out the door, but then stopped and whispered, "Don't drink the punch."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The wedding went according to plan. Lily was relieved to find that James wasn't having one of his mischievous moments. Over the past chaotic week, she'd been having the biggest fear that James would do something completely awful.  
  
Although, Lily had seen Sirius with his wand out next to the punch bowl, so she steered her guests away from it when she could.  
  
Other than that, she found she could breathe easier knowing everything was going to be perfect.  
  
Of course, Lily's relief was only temporary. Leave it to Padfoot to crack a joke when Prongs failed to.  
  
Just when the couple said their 'I do's and James squeezed her hand softly, lifted the veil from over her face and went to kiss her, Lily heard a whistle and a cat call from the back.  
  
Rebecca heard this, and strained to keep a straight face while Remus turned his head.  
  
Lily, however, kissed James and tried desperately to ignore it.  
  
She would kill Sirius later.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
No, she doesn't really kill Sirius. *rolls eyes*  
  
I'm sorry that this was so rushed, but I had to do this early to fit with my timeline. Okay? Oh yes, and there should be a small passage that looks familiar. That's because it was in the first chapter of "Like an Open Window".  
  
Subliminal message: Review or suffer horrible torture involving spoons. 


	16. Two Meetings

AN: Not much plot development. But still, I'm too attached to my chapters to throw one out. Hope you like it more than I do. *wink*  
  
~~  
  
While his friends were having the time if their lives at James and Lily's wedding, Peter was in a completely different atmosphere.  
  
The tattoo that had been burned into his left forearm when he joined the ranks of the Dark Lord was normally clear, but this time it burned painfully black.  
  
He had to leave without an excuse, or his absence would be noted. The Dark Lord called whenever he wanted to, and gave no warning.  
  
He apparated to the cold dark cave where they had started meeting with a slight twinge of fear at what might have happened, or even worse, what information the Dark Lord needed.  
  
Lord Voldemort remained silent until the spaces in the circle of Death Eaters were filled. Finally, when everyone had arrived, he spoke in that high cold voice. "My friends."  
  
Everyone bowed. "Master," came the reply. Peter knew what was coming. He was Voldemort's new target for information, being the only member of the Order of the Phoenix in these ranks.  
  
Sure enough, those red cat-like eyes rested on him expectantly.  
  
"News, Wormtail?"  
  
Peter jumped slightly. Voldemort had never called him that, and he had never told him of his school nickname. The Dark Lord's lips turned upwards in a sneer as he noticed Peter's alarm at his sudden insight into his memories.  
  
Peter shook his head. "No news, my lord. They have not discussed much in their meetings lately." A few Death eaters chuckled at this.  
  
Voldemort nodded. "That is because they have nothing to discuss. Names, then? I daresay if one of their numbers winds up dead, they'll start discussing more important matters."  
  
Several of the Death Eaters laughed, and turned to Peter for an answer. Names, they wanted names.  
  
But several of the names brought a pang in his heart. Many of them he did not want dead. Fortunately, the Dark Lord was not piercing him with his glare, so he would not notice this sudden surge of emotion in his servant.  
  
Peter gave him the name of the person he knew the least. "McKinnon. Marlene McKinnon. I believe she has a husband and children."  
  
Voldemort took a moment to consider this. "Good, Wormtail. Best to start with someone insignificant. Just to give them the idea."  
  
"Travers." A Death Eater stepped forward, his hood hiding his face from view. "Yes, my Lord?"  
  
"Do it quickly. The whole family."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The cold winds of October swept through, and along with it came the mysterious deaths of Marlene McKinnon, and her family.  
  
Only two weeks after the Order had been made official, one of their members was already dead.  
  
"We're too open, Albus," growled Moody. "We need at least a few precautions."  
  
Dumbledore nodded gravely. Everyone was silent and pensive as they searched for the perfect solution.  
  
"We need to change headquarters constantly," Elphias Doge contributed with an uncharacteristic frown.  
  
Dorcas Meadowes shook her head, "That'd be too difficult for everyone. Not different, just unplottable."  
  
Remus's head shot up. "My house is unplottable and fairly large, and my parents moved out of it a while ago. It's pretty hidden right on the edge of some woods."  
  
"Right," said Gideon. "But that's not enough if it's only unplottable. Members can still be followed."  
  
Fabian nodded, "And any information can be overheard, or leak out." Peter shifted in his chair uncomfortably.  
  
There was a moment's silence as everyone considered what could be done.  
  
"Fidelius Charm," Dorcas said finally.  
  
Several people nodded in agreement, and others shook their heads.  
  
Moody was one of them. "That would require a secret keeper, and as we can already tell, any one of us can be attacked next."  
  
"Make it Dumbledore, then. No one would be stupid enough to attack Dumbledore," Lily said, finally speaking up.  
  
Most people seemed to agree strongly with this idea, and Dumbledore smiled, but only briefly.  
  
"In the mean time, we will direct most of our efforts to finding more people to join," he said, with a sad look. "Before our numbers dwindle."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Just a little note to DragonPrincessNikki: I never imagined Dorcas as an airhead. It's just that, before, she was only seventeen. I wanted to make some room for character development. I really really like the idea of having her as a spy for Dumbledore. At first I wanted to do that - but then I stumbled into Peter. I figured it'd be impossible for Dorcas to be a death eater and not know about Peter. The same applies for Snape. *hits head on desk repeatedly* Oh no! How am I going to write about Snape? 


	17. Born Pure

AN: Ooooh, this is my favorite. Thanks for the reviews!!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not take credit for these characters. I can't help it if James has glasses, and Remus is a werewolf. It wasn't my idea! Except maybe this chapter. Yeah, that's mine.  
  
Hehe, I wrote this chapter at Halloween. How weird is that?  
  
~~  
  
Halloween was really a bit of a joke in the wizarding community. The idea of muggles dressing up as witches and wizards without the slightest clue as to how stupid they really looked was almost a form of entertainment, even if it only happened once a year.  
  
"Let's see," James said with a smirk. "I'll go as wizard,"  
  
"Hey, I was going as a wizard!" Sirius exclaimed, with mock offense.  
  
"Let me guess," Remus said finally. "I'll be the werewolf?"  
  
James stopped his joking and turned to his friend. "It isn't a full moon, is it?" he asked, nervously glancing out at the darkening sky.  
  
Remus shook his head, his eyes closed - a wave of dark memories crept into his mind involuntarily.  
  
Sirius frowned. "Ah, that would've been fun, eh? Going around, scaring the muggles?" he said, trying to cheer Remus up.  
  
"Maybe for you," Remus muttered darkly.  
  
Sirius turned his head, pretending to be interested in something outside the window.  
  
James jumped in to break the tension. "So, er, where are we going? I mean, we can't just waste a whole Halloween night without at least a bit of mayhem."  
  
Sirius gave an odd sort of half grin, "Well, most people are going to Hogsmeade, you know, the graduates?"  
  
"And?" Remus prodded lazily.  
  
"And," Sirius continued with a grin, "I thought, being so close to the school, we should pay the students a little visit."  
  
Remus shook his head disapprovingly, but with a grin matching Sirius's. "We'd get in loads of trouble for that," he said teasingly.  
  
James grinned as well, inclining his head. "Yes, but even if we go on school grounds, Filch can't do so much as shake his walking stick at us. And seeing as we aren't even students, we're certainly not landing in detention with McGonagall."  
  
Remus gave up his disapproving look, letting the smile spread to his eyes. "And who ever heard of being sent to Azkaban for a little prank?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What is it, Becca?" Lily asked, bringing out her wand to pack her things. Since marrying James, she would be moving out of the flat she and Rebecca shared, and into the Potter House.  
  
"A note," Becca answered, giving the owl a knut and opening the note.  
  
"What's it say?" Lily asked, quickly losing interest in her packing.  
  
She watched Becca's face light up as she read the note. Lily gave her a questioning look, and Becca only smiled all the more.  
  
"Remus wants to meet me in Hogsmeade."  
  
Lily smiled slightly, "I thought we were all going to Hogsmeade."  
  
Becca shook her head, looking back down at the note. "Yes, but this says behind the Shrieking Shack at nine thirty."  
  
Lily frowned. "Wonder what he wants?" she said distantly, looking at the note herself.  
  
Becca's heart fluttered and her stomach flopped. She thought of his calm face and his sandy hair and his lilting smile that made his eyes dance. Remus wanted to talk to her? Whatever it was, she couldn't help but grin.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Padfoot, this is stupid," James said as he watched Sirius fiddle with the parts of his motorbike. It seemed to have stalled or something, and none of them knew any muggle mechanics, or even knew what a muggle mechanic was.  
  
"The flying charm still works, I know that, it's just this - thing!" Sirius kicked the motorbike in frustration.  
  
"What thing?" Remus asked.  
  
Sirius looked exasperated. He was hoping *someone* would know what he was talking about. "You know, the thing that makes the whirring sound when you turn it on."  
  
James exhaled loudly. "Come on, we didn't learn to Apparate for nothing."  
  
Sirius was shaking his head, still pushing what he thought were buttons, only wishing he had the slightest clue as to what he was doing.  
  
Remus was straining his face to keep from smiling. "It's no use," he said, trying to sound grave.  
  
"Where's Peter?" James asked Remus after giving up on Sirius.  
  
Remus shrugged. "He said he'd meet us there."  
  
James narrowed his eyes at the ground. "I'm telling you, there's something odd about him."  
  
Sirius called over his shoulder, "Blimey, you're not still on about old Wormtail, are you?"  
  
James shrugged.  
  
"We're leaving," Remus said finally.  
  
James smirked. "All right, Padfoot, we'll just terrorize the children without you."  
  
Remus frowned with concern. "We aren't going to scare them *that* bad, are we?"  
  
James shook his head, gave a hopeless look to Sirius, and Disapparated. Remus followed suit.  
  
And, much to their amusement, it wasn't long at all before Sirius Apparated behind them, looking crestfallen.  
  
They walked around Hogsmeade greeting old students and grabbing a few butterbeers, but still saw no sign of Peter. Finally, the three of them caught up with Lily and Dorcas.  
  
James and Lily immediately latched onto each other, beaming brightly - as they always did.  
  
Remus looked around them and frowned. "Where's Becca?" he asked distractedly.  
  
"Oh, hello to you too, Remus," Dorcas said sarcastically. "I'm doing okay, thanks for asking."  
  
"Hello Dorcas. How are you doing?" Sirius said loudly, and Dorcas gave him a broad smile. Remus gave him a withering look.  
  
Lily, however, looked completely baffled. "Becca? I - I thought she was with you."  
  
Remus was slightly taken aback. "With me?"  
  
Lily nodded slowly, but uncertainly. "Yeah, you sent her a note."  
  
"Did I?"  
  
"Did you?"  
  
Remus shook his head, his eyes widening.  
  
Lily glanced at James's wristwatch and saw that it was nine forty five. Her tell-tale hand flew to her mouth.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*A respectable pureblood marriage.*  
  
Rebecca's thoughts were swimming with the thought of Remus. His voice, his hair, his smile, his hands. Her heart sped up.  
  
She closed her eyes, and let the wind brush across her face - feeling as if she were soaring.  
  
But somehow, to her dismay, Lucius seemed to be creeping into her mind as well. She quickened her pace up the hill and around the winding path that led to the outskirts of the village of Hogsmeade.  
  
How could she think of Lucius at a time like this? The stupid git didn't deserve any thought.  
  
Nevertheless, after a few minutes she started to get the feeling that her Sight was warning her of something.  
  
*Pureblood.*  
  
The word pierced her thoughts bitterly with the image of a sneering smile. She rubbed her eyes hard to rid herself of the fear that was clutching her heart.  
  
Nothing was wrong. Remus was here, just around the corner.  
  
*Pureblood.* It was a taunting call.  
  
She shook her head, and a small smile spread tentatively across her face as the Shrieking Shack came into view over the hill. Remus was there, waiting for her.  
  
It was dark and the shack was casting shadows on itself, but at the same time it was oddly inviting. A chill ran through her as she passed by the door, which was obscured by claw marks. How many full moons had Remus spent here?  
  
She passed by the house, and around to the back - lost in her curiosity and anticipation that, at first, her mind didn't register the sight before her for what it was.  
  
Her smile faltered when her gaze was met by none other than Lucius Malfoy's. Rebecca's eyes darted downwards to where Lucius's hand was gripping his wand tightly, but confidently. His arm was outstretched, and the wand was pointing straight toward Rebecca's heart.  
  
She became suddenly aware that her wand was in her pocket, and she was grateful for it. She brought it out at break-neck speed, as if she had been expecting this to happen - even though she hadn't.  
  
Lucius stepped forward, and Rebecca took a clumsy step back.  
  
"Don't move," he said ominously, but Rebecca, blinded by panic, continued to stumble backwards until Lucius whispered the words that made her stop in her tracks.  
  
"Imperio."  
  
The spell struck her as if it were a rushing wind. All worries, all thoughts - lifted. She felt perfectly content and droopy as the ability of controlling her actions was taken from her.  
  
*Don't move.* His mouth hadn't opened, but Rebecca could hear his voice echoing through the empty chambers of her mind. She obeyed, perfectly comfortable with where she was standing.  
  
*Drop your wand,* the voice demanded, and Lucius gave her a meaningful look when she hesitated.  
  
*No,* she thought. There must have been an important reason why she had her wand out in front of her. She needed it. Something was threatening her. She needed to protect herself.  
  
*Drop your wand,* the voice persisted. It felt right, almost natural to obey. It was the easiest thing to do, even if she hadn't the slightest clue what she was getting into.  
  
Her wand clattered to the ground, but she didn't notice as the voice entered her thoughts again, telling her to follow. . .  
  
~~  
  
AN: Please don't pelt me with cudgels, okay? I had to do it. 


	18. Letters

AN: Here's a long one. Oh, and in reaction to Nikki's review: the full moon thing I said in the summary won't happen till the end, and trust me, this story's far from over!  
  
~~~~  
  
Rebecca woke up gradually, feeling groggy and exhausted. What was with that strange dream she'd had? More importantly, where was she and where was Remus. . . and who's house elf was this?  
  
Rebecca shot up, while the house elf tried to drape a blanket over her. She looked around her wildly, panic overpowering her common sense. She'd never been here before.  
  
She was on an emerald green couch in a high-ceilinged richly decorated room, with a large marble fireplace with snakes elaborately carved around the corners.  
  
She turned to the house elf. "Where am I?" she demanded, a bit harsh. The house elf cowered back and shook its head as if it couldn't bare to say it. "D - Dobby wonders where to begin."  
  
Rebecca sighed, and softened her voice as she felt compassion towards the elf. "Just tell me where I am, then you can explain."  
  
The house elf named Dobby glanced shiftily behind him and left to right, checking to see if anyone was listening. "This is the Manor of Malfoy, miss."  
  
Rebecca was shocked, almost disgusted. Why was she *here*?  
  
"Why am I here?" she said, echoing her thoughts.  
  
Dobby stiffened, his eyes widened, and he collapsed into sobs.  
  
Rebecca looked around, startled, not knowing what to do.  
  
After a few minutes, the elf looked up at her with watery eyes. "Dobby does not wish to speak ill of his master."  
  
Rebecca thought for a second, finding a way to get around Dobby's loyalty. "What did your. . . master," she began, emphasizing the word with disgust, ". . .do, exactly?"  
  
Dobby eyed her warily. "It's not what master did, it's what mistress did."  
  
Mistress?  
  
"Who's that?" Rebecca asked, not sure she wanted to know.  
  
Dobby gave her a meaningful look.  
  
"What did. I do?" Rebecca asked uncertainly.  
  
Dobby shook his head nervously, "It wasn't mistress's fault, she didn't know. It was Dobby's master. He made her do it. His wand. Master used his wand. Mistress didn't know." After saying this, Dobby hit his head on the edge of the coffee table, but Rebecca pulled him back.  
  
Her throat was constricted, but she managed to ask, "What did he make me do?"  
  
Dobby conjured what appeared to be documents with the snap of his fingers. With a closer look, Rebecca could see what it said. It only took a moment for her to realize that they were marriage documents, and in another moment she noticed a wobbly signature at the bottom that she recognized as her own.  
  
She was legally married to Lucius Malfoy.  
  
*Pureblood*. That's all she was.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"This could have been easy," he said quietly, examining his fingernails with only the slightest bit of interest.  
  
Rebecca decided she was not going to answer to anything he said.  
  
Lucius gave her a sidelong glance, acknowledging her silence, and continued. "It's all I asked. All I asked," he said simply, as if she were the one at fault. "Just a son to carry my name."  
  
Rebecca didn't even flinch.  
  
"But you," he said finally, turning to her. "You had to make things difficult. Complicated."  
  
Rebecca met his gaze with a steady glare. He smirked. "Of course, all you needed was a little persuasion," he said, slowly bringing out his wand, and examining it as he had examined his fingernails.  
  
On the outside, Rebecca was as stolid and blank as a stone, but on the inside, her thoughts were racing. She had no wand. Remus was far from here. No one knew she was here. His wand was out. He was smirking. He could use the Imperius curse on her any time he fancied. She had no control whatsoever.  
  
No compromise was possible when anything she offered could just as easily be forcibly taken.  
  
"It's a pity I had to resort to such measures," he said indifferently.  
  
"It's a pity you couldn't find anyone who'd have you," Rebecca muttered under her breath. She hadn't the slightest clue how he would react to sarcasm, and quite frankly, she didn't care.  
  
If she would be here for the rest of her life against her will, she definitely wasn't going to go quietly.  
  
But Lucius didn't strike her or anything of the sort at all. On the contrary, he smiled. "You are in no way discreet, are you?"  
  
Rebecca didn't answer. She wasn't going to play games.  
  
Nevertheless, Lucius laughed as if she had said no. He seemed to have his mind made up about something, because when he looked back at her, he had this certain confidence about him that made Rebecca nervous.  
  
"That does not matter anymore," he said, still wearing that awful smile. "You answer to me now."  
  
Rebecca gritted her teeth, and her face contorted as if she had tasted something sour. The worst thing was that she couldn't fight back. She closed her eyes so she wouldn't have to see him bring out his wand from the pocket of his robes.  
  
She strained to focus her ears on the ticking clock across the room, so she wouldn't hear him whisper the Imperius curse.  
  
But before she could realize that the spell had struck her, her mind went blank. His wand out and steady in his hands, he kissed her.  
  
Though, she didn't realize it. Her mind was too focused on the task of obeying its command to sit still and not move an inch.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Apart from when he transformed, Remus Lupin could not remember feeling so panicked in his life.  
  
There was no word from Rebecca, and she had been gone for three days. He'd trusted Dorcas with asking people casually at work whether they had heard any news from her. This proved to be difficult seeing as not many people from the Ministry knew exactly who Rebecca Waters was.  
  
Right now, Remus's only solace, his only hope, resided in this small tawny owl in front of him. It hooted impatiently when it found that Remus hadn't written anything yet.  
  
*Dash it all*, he thought, still not able to come up with anything to write.  
  
*Hey Rebecca, mind telling anyone where you've gone off to?*  
  
Maybe he shouldn't write anything.  
  
Of course, this was only assuming that the owl found her at all. It was a particularly difficult task, but somehow this owl had managed to have not let him down so far.  
  
He sighed shakily, and turned to address the owl. "Just find Rebecca, and . . ." he hesitated as he thought. He picked up the quill, ink bottle, and parchment, and tied it together with a leather string, and looped it around the owl's leg. "And give her this in case she has nothing to write with."  
  
The owl hooted, and Remus added one more thing. "Don't come back if you haven't found her," he said, becoming increasingly desperate. He couldn't go looking for her because he didn't know where to begin, but he couldn't just sit here without doing *something* useful.  
  
It wasn't like Rebecca to just run off like this. The fear increased, constricting his throat.  
  
"And don't give me that," Remus said softly, but indignantly - noting the reproachful look his owl was giving him for telling it not to come back if it didn't need to.  
  
He clenched his teeth, finally allowing a small bit of compassion for the tiny thing. He rummaged around for some food to give the owl, and after eating and hooting gratefully, the small owl took off awkwardly and lopsided, half of it weighed down by the load.  
  
He tried sitting down, but that only made him restless, so he paced around the entire front room of his house, which was now headquarters for the Order of the Phoenix.  
  
It was only a matter of time. Remus had always been very patient with things. But this. . .  
  
He shook his head restlessly, and continued to pace - back and forth, back and forth. . . only partly aware that his pacing was doing no good except for keeping him from bursting all at once.  
  
It was only a matter of time.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Time, however, was not on his side.  
  
All too early, that night was another Order meeting. Remus didn't feel up to going, but he didn't exactly have a choice seeing as they were meeting at his house now.  
  
James and Lily arrived a little later than usual, and both were looking upset. Lily looked a little red in the face as if she had been shouting, and James had his arms crossed, which was never a good sign.  
  
Alice Longbottom took this into consideration, and walked over to Lily. "Lily, what's wrong?" she asked in a concerned tone.  
  
Lily scowled, "James."  
  
"I only told her I don't want children right now," James explained innocently to Frank Longbottom. "And she just blew up on me."  
  
Lily shook her head, "I brought it up to tell him something important, and he just pushed it aside like it wasn't even my decision!"  
  
"Well, you can't blame him," Sirius said, joining in on the conversation without invitation.  
  
"And what do you have against children?" Lily snapped.  
  
"Nothing," he said. "Love the little brats, but James. he's just miffed easily, you know. They probably get on his nerves."  
  
"I don't see why it's such a big deal," James said. "Oh no," he said, looking over to where Lily was. "What's Sirius telling her?"  
  
"See now, this one time there was this little boy, about seven I'd say," Sirius began - grinning. "He saw that the boy was crying, and tried to give him the snitch he'd stolen from school. It opened up, and flew right into the boy's face before he could reach out for it."  
  
Lily and Alice glanced at each other uncertainly. Sirius was having a difficult time telling the story while keeping himself from doubling up with laughter. "Now see. the boy had a few little friends with him." Sirius nearly fell over, and James turned around.  
  
"They all started beatin' up on him," he continued. "I had to step back to keep myself from being injured by the little buggers." he paused to laugh again, and James started to walk over to where they were. Lily was sure at least some of this had been exaggerated to fit his entertainment.  
  
"And one of them," Sirius said, almost crying now, "one of them kicked him hard in the - "  
  
"Sirius!" James said loudly when he caught wind of the story he was telling.  
  
"What'd I do?" he asked innocently, but the grin gave him away. Lily's smile faded when James turned to look at her, and she turned away.  
  
Dumbledore walked into the room, and everyone took a seat at the large dining table. He cleared his throat before sitting down.  
  
"I see we have a guest?" Dumbledore ventured, nodding at a thin, bony witch in her late thirties. The witch nodded. "Arabella Figg," she said, and everyone smiled warmly.  
  
"I won't be of much use," she added. "I'm only a squib. But anything I can do to round up Voldemort's followers, I'm willing to do," she finished with a bitter tone and what sounded like disgust.  
  
A few people flinched at the sound of the name, (Voldemort's, not Mrs. Figg's) but nodded after hearing what Mrs. Figg had to say. Remus frowned. He knew Mrs. Figg - she had been a friend of his mother's. The reason she was so eager to be of help to the Order was probably due to the fact that her husband had been killed by a Death Eater.  
  
"Now, on to the whereabouts of Rebecca Waters," Dumbledore said gravely. "Any news?"  
  
Remus looked to Dorcas expectantly, almost pleadingly, but she frowned and shook her head apologetically.  
  
Peter's eyes were wide and blank, his fingernails digging into the table. Remus saw the damage that it was doing to the table, but didn't say a word.  
  
"No one's heard anything from her," Dorcas said with a sigh. "I asked everyone who works in my department."  
  
"Alice and I asked all our fellow Aurors," Frank said. "Not many even know who Rebecca Waters is."  
  
Peter gripped the sides of his chair. "Malfoy," he said, the name flying out of his mouth before he could stop it.  
  
"What?" Remus said, struggling to keep his voice calm.  
  
Peter looked around nervously, aware that he had made a mistake. Nevertheless, he told them what he knew. "She's married," he confessed.  
  
Remus's jaw dropped. Why would she do a thing like that? Lily was shaking her head skeptically. "I saw her last, and she didn't look like she was about to run off and marry someone."  
  
"Where'd you hear a story like that, Peter?" Gideon asked, almost laughing at how stupid it sounded.  
  
Peter shook his head, ignoring the question. "I - I know for a fact that she's married to Lucius Malfoy."  
  
"Where did you hear that, Peter?" Dumbledore asked, repeating the question. According to what the Death Eaters had told him, Dumbledore was skilled at Legilimency. They advised Peter to look away anytime Dumbledore looked straight at him. This Peter did.  
  
"I - I saw him," Peter said, formulating a convincing story in his mind, still averting Dumbledore's eyes. "I saw him at the ministry, an - and he told me." The truth was, he'd heard Lucius bragging about it with some other Death Eaters. Personally, he, Peter, was disgusted by it, but he couldn't risk his whereabouts and connections with those people in front of Dumbledore.  
  
"He just told you?" James asked accusingly. "Just like that?"  
  
Peter nodded quickly, guilt washing through him. He heard James mutter something that sounded like "bull".  
  
Dumbledore watched him a moment longer, apparently making his mind up about something, and when he saw that Peter wasn't going to make eye contact, he said, "We will have members investigate this further. In the mean time, is there anything further anyone would like to report?"  
  
Everyone remained silent. James was watching Peter intently, and Lily was watching him watch Peter. Sirius was gazing at the ceiling, his chair standing on two legs, and Remus was staring at the table, but not really seeing it at all.  
  
Dumbledore cleared his throat for the last time, and said, "In that case, there's no further reason to sit gathered here, when there is so much to fight against."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The sun splashed through the arched windows, slowly waking Rebecca from her troubled sleep. She'd dreamed about Remus again, and she could almost feel his pain.  
  
Was it for her? She had to let him know she was here. Dobby the house elf entered the room carrying her breakfast. He set it down on the table in front of her, and gave her an understanding, compassionate look. Rebecca smiled feebly. She and Dobby were in the same situation - trapped in a cold house, deprived of free will.  
  
"Dobby," she whispered. The house elf turned around slowly, intrigued by the fact that she was whispering.  
  
Rebecca looked around her before saying, "Is there a way to get out of here?"  
  
For the first time in her life, Rebecca saw a house elf smile secretively.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Making sure Lucius was nowhere to be seen, Rebecca opened the window, letting in the small tawny owl. Her heart leapt when she recognized the owl as Remus's. She took the quill, parchment and ink from the poor owl's leg, and offered the owl her breakfast - she'd pretty much lost her appetite as of late.  
  
She gave one more nervous glance around the room before dipping the quill in the bottle of ink.  
  
Remus,  
  
She thought for a moment. How could she word this?  
  
I'm all right. I'm sheltered and fed, but I'll explain where I am later. I'm trapped, but I've found a way out.  
  
This was true. Dobby had told her of a way to escape the charm that made it impossible for her to Disapparate from the Manor. However, it required patience.  
  
Don't worry about me. Meet me in Diagon Alley by Gringott's at nine-thirty on the new moon. Tell everyone I'm all right, and that I miss them.  
  
Love,  
  
Rebecca stopped writing, staring at the word she'd written. Desire washed through her involuntarily. His smile - that whimsical smile that made her spirits soar and her head spin. His eyes dancing when they looked into hers. Did he love her? It was a stupid thing to think, really.  
  
With a sad sigh, she signed the letter.  
  
AN: One word: Jamie!  
  
Another word (allowed to be repeated incessantly): Review! Review! Review! Review! 


	19. New Moon

Author's Note: Save Ferris Bueller!  
  
Disclaimer: *in a bored voice* No, I don't own this, how many times do I have to tell you? No, Remus isn't my character. No, wishful thinking doesn't help much. No, I'm not JK Rowling, and if I was, why the heck would I be writing fanfiction?  
  
~~  
  
Rebecca crept silently down the richly decorated hallway - her only source of light being the moon shining through the windows. Along the walls hung large portraits of pale, pointed-faced witches and wizards. A chill ran down Rebecca's spine. Her face would never hang on that wall.  
  
"Where do you think you're going?" a cold, drawling voice asked from behind her. Rebecca spun around, but saw that there was no one behind her. She started to turn back around, but halfway through, her eyes caught the watchful glare of one of the enchanted portraits.  
  
"The library," she replied truthfully. The sour faced witch frowned suspiciously, and left her frame. Rebecca ignored the hissing and snide comments, and proceeded down the hallway that led to the library.  
  
Smiling slightly to herself, she leaned against the massive doors, and shoved them open. Despite it's dark and forbidding air, the room was breathtaking. Walls were stacked with volumes and volumes of books, all towering over her endlessly. As her eyes traveled up and past the point where all was lost in darkness, she felt as if she were shrinking compared to the immense stature of the room.  
  
On the left side of the doors, Rebecca noticed, was an empty portrait, and within moments of her arrival, the sour faced witch appeared from the side of the frame - slightly out of breath.  
  
Clearly disappointed that Rebecca had been honest, she left to another empty frame that held a chintz armchair, and sat down wearily, still watching Rebecca out of the corner of her eye.  
  
She smiled deviously, and gave the witch a cheery little wave. So what if Lucius had apparently made orders to have her watched? Even if it was the middle of the night, her intentions were innocent enough - all she wanted to do was read a book.  
  
She turned her attention to the small table beside her. The book she was looking for was already there. Dobby had taken it out for her earlier today.  
  
He'd told her hurriedly the main points, but he hadn't told her the specifics - just to look for the answer in the library.  
  
She stood the book on it's spine, and let it flop open to where the bookmark held its place. Before her lay a giant illustration of the moon, and a small passage written in miniscule writing at the side.  
  
The Source of Power for Wandless Charms  
  
*Wandless charms include most known charms and jinxes today. These charms require the wand only for the incantation, but after, the charm or jinx is effective only until the countercharm or counterjinx is administered, unlike curses such as the Unforgivable curses, where the wand is required to be out the whole time the spell is effective.  
  
So what keeps these wandless charms going if the wand is only used for the incantation? The answer is the moon. Whether night or day, light is reflected off the moon, except for one night of the month, being the new moon.  
  
The time must be exact as well for wandless charms to be ineffective, and it only lasts a few seconds, before the charm finds an alternate source.*  
  
Rebecca stopped her reading, and left the book there. That's all she needed. She would Disapparate from this awful place and meet Remus on the new moon.  
  
She stood up and winked at the scowling witch who sat disdainfully behind her frame.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"James, I - "  
  
"I'm sorry," James mumbled before Lily could finish.  
  
Lily gave him a hard look, ignoring the temptation to grin. "Sure you are," she said coolly.  
  
"I am," James said.  
  
Lily cocked her head to the side. "Sorry for what?" she ventured encouragingly.  
  
James looked at her uneasily, apparently searching for the right words. "You know what," he said finally.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes and shook her head. "Well, pretend I'm not as smart as I look," she said.  
  
James snorted, biting his tongue. But Lily didn't smile at all. Clearly, this was one of those occasions where James really shouldn't try to make her laugh.  
  
He sighed wearily.  
  
"If you're going to apologize, you might as well do it properly," Lily said matter-of-factly.  
  
James raised his eyebrows. This wasn't at all like Lily. Or maybe it was completely Lily. He had no idea.  
  
Why'd they have to get married so early?  
  
Then again, that was his idea.  
  
"I'm sorry for pushing aside the concept of having children without discussing it with you first," he said as if he had memorized it.  
  
Lily's eyes softened, and she smiled. James gave her a quizzical look. Was she happy now because he had recited some fake apology? Was it because he had admitted that she was right and he was wrong?  
  
"Now," she said quietly, her eyes smiling at him warmly like summer grass. "With that settled and everything, there's something I need to tell you."  
  
It was then James realized that Lily wasn't smiling triumphantly that he had surrendered, but that she was smiling happily.  
  
She must have some really good news.  
  
Just when James was sure she was going to tell him, she changed subjects again. "Well, now that we're talking about children - "  
  
"Lily, just tell me."  
  
"I *am* telling you," she snapped, and when her smile returned, it was more nervous than it was happy.  
  
"Now," she began again, her mouth going dry. "I want to know what you think about children now that - "  
  
"You know how I feel about children," James interrupted. They were whining, destructive little brats.  
  
"James," she said hopelessly.  
  
"We're not having children. Not now, at least."  
  
"Oh, but we are!" Lily said firmly.  
  
James exhaled sharply. "Look, I know you've probably got you're mind set on this and everything, but - "  
  
"No, James," she interrupted, giving him a meaningful look. "We *are* having a child," she said slowly.  
  
"Lily, I thought we were both deciding on this," James said, quickly losing his patience.  
  
"No, James, you don't understand, we - "  
  
"Lily!"  
  
"James!" Lily grabbed hold of James's hands, and looked straight into his eyes. They weren't blazing with green fire like they did when she got angry, but instead they had a firm desperation, and a will for him to listen.  
  
"James," she said softer now. "We're having a child."  
  
James opened his mouth to retort, somewhat appalled that she was being so persistent, but stopped short when he saw her hand rest on her stomach.  
  
She smiled shakily.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus always felt good on the new moon. Probably because it was exact opposite from the full moon.  
  
Except today.  
  
Sure, he would see Rebecca for the first time in almost a month - but would she be the same? What had happened to her? Where had she been?  
  
Despite wanting to see her, he felt he really shouldn't be looking forward to this. It would probably be a real blow to him - and to her. He wanted to get things back the way they were. Like students, except without the castle.  
  
But now. . .  
  
Now he was in the Order. Everyone who'd put their names down, had put their lives down. They were in the open line of fire.  
  
Including him.  
  
He promised he wouldn't let Becca join. She'd want to, of course. Being the outgoing, intellectual spitfire she was, she wouldn't want to sit back and do nothing.  
  
But despite all that, he wouldn't let her. He'd promised himself that. She'd be giving up her safety, her hopes, her dreams, and her future.  
  
Remus glanced out the window at the moonless night. He no longer had hopes or dreams. Even if he did, they were useless. He was in the Order of the Phoenix now, and he'd be devoting all his time and energy to it.  
  
He wasn't going to be a teacher like he'd always thought he'd be.  
  
He shook his head, and grabbed his cloak. In the moment it took him to see himself in front of Gringott's, he was gone.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
For a brief moment, and lapse of common sense, Rebecca considered packing her things before she left. Then, of course, she remembered the fact that she had been kidnapped, so there was really nothing to pack.  
  
She groaned. Not even her wand.  
  
The sun had set a while ago, and the enchanted lamps around her lit themselves, causing the room to be illuminated only by a dim glow.  
  
Rebecca glanced at the tall snake-entwined cherry wood grandfather clock. Ten minutes until nine-thirty. . .  
  
She poked her head out into the hallway, a little restless at the thought of wasting ten minutes just waiting for the clock to strike the half hour.  
  
In the shadows, her eyes met with two green almond shaped ones. "Dobby?" she whispered curiously.  
  
The pair of eyes rose and fell as the house elf nodded, still hidden in shadow. A small hand extended towards her, illuminated by the light spilling from the next room.  
  
The fingers were loosely clutched to a small document.  
  
Rebecca glanced at the hand and took the paper. She smiled broadly, and looked back up. "Thanks, Dobby," she said, truly grateful.  
  
Dobby nodded again, his eyes shining.  
  
Rebecca stayed silent, listening to the unceasing counting of the clock. "Dobby," she whispered.  
  
The pair of green eyes snapped back to hers.  
  
Rebecca swallowed, not sure how to say this. She really couldn't promise anything. "You'll be free someday," she said.  
  
Even though she was a Seer, she didn't see this particular event in Dobby's life. She couldn't exactly See things at will, and she somewhat doubted her own words.  
  
Nevertheless, Dobby's eyes spilled with tears. He believed her.  
  
Rebecca gave one last smile, the document still in her hand, and stepped back into the living room.  
  
She instantly felt guilty for giving Dobby false hope.  
  
Shaking it off, she noticed a quill on a coffee table. She glanced at the clock, which had just approached nine twenty-six.  
  
With a great feeling of hope gathering inside of her, she hastily signed the document.  
  
She closed her eyes, and opened her Inner Eye to the quiet house to see if Lucius was coming. In an instant, her eyes snapped open again.  
  
A second later, Lucius opened the door to the room - just as she had foreseen too late.  
  
"What are you doing down here?" he demanded.  
  
"It's not late at all," she replied, forcing her voice to keep calm and casual.  
  
"It doesn't matter what time it is," Lucius said impatiently. "I told you not to come down here unless I'm with you." His cold gray eyes bore into hers. There were obviously things in this house he'd rather not have others see.  
  
"Well, you're with me now," she said simply. His eyes widened in fury and she smiled deviously to hide her nerves. She couldn't help glancing at the clock. Nine twenty-eight. . .  
  
He fumbled in his pockets, but clearly, didn't have his wand with him. Without warning, he resorted to physical violence.  
  
Her cheek stung where he'd hit her, but she wasn't broken yet. It was always like this. He'd beat her until she finally broke down, and each time she got stronger and stronger - and the beatings got worse. This was far from over.  
  
Yet, she knew it would end tonight. Maybe he wouldn't chase after her. Maybe he'd give up.  
  
"You never were very persuasive," she said, her eyes dead set and emotionless - waiting for the blow. His eyes were blazing, so bright with rage that Rebecca didn't notice his fist until it made contact with her face, throwing her against the wall.  
  
She stumbled up, knowing that any minute, she would be needing her strength to Disapparate.  
  
He looked her up and down as if challenging her to say more. But for once, she kept quiet. Something in his eyes was making her insides twist. She felt sick. He smiled, noting that she had lost her confidence in the situation.  
  
Nine twenty-nine. . .  
  
In an instant she knew, even if he didn't. Nobody knew. It was too early to know at all. Yet she knew, but not just by her insight into the future - she could feel it. There was life inside her.  
  
Rebecca inhaled, regained her stature, and the moment she closed her eyes, the clock struck the half hour with a resounding tone, echoing throughout the Manor in a low hum.  
  
When she opened her eyes, she saw the lamps had gone out - the charm that kept them on had faltered. But any moment, they would flicker on again.  
  
In the darkness, Rebecca thrust the signed document into Lucius's hand, and Disapparated before the lamps relit.  
  
The dark walls of the Manor were replaced by a starlit sky, the clock replaced by the towering silhouette of Gringott's Bank, and Lucius Malfoy - the fowl creature - replaced by the gentle figure of Remus Lupin.  
  
Her heart sang, but she didn't move. She let her hand fly to her face - which had started to throb with pain, and her lips began to tremble. She sensed the life again, though small and weak.  
  
"You're late," she said, trying to tease, but failing enormously when her voice broke. She'd constantly told herself to keep control in any situation - especially something like this. Never let her emotions go. But she couldn't help it, she'd cried on his shoulder once, and it almost felt inviting to her to let everything out that she'd been keeping silent - screaming in her head - for the past month.  
  
Despite the obvious fact that he had been there first, he nodded his head slowly and said, "I know."  
  
She smiled tremulously, and to her relief, Remus refrained from asking questions. Instead, he stepped forward and, without a word, let her walk into his embrace.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*author wipes a tear from her eye* haha, just kidding. You won't believe how many times I changed this chapter. *shakes head* That's why it's a good thing I didn't post it weeks ago, or I'd just go back and change it again.  
  
Not to reviewers: I worship you.  
  
DragonPrincessNikki: why is it every time you review, you seem to accurately predict the next chapter? Oh well, I guess I can't help it if my foreshadowing is a bit obvious. . . Thanks for the reviews, and *keep writing*, because I just love your story to death!  
  
Nixiy: hehe, yeah, I have a thing for classic situations. I hate it when people are offended when they see a damsel-in-distress story. Yes, I am a bit sympathetic of Peter, and I can't help making people feel sorry for him. It's just so sad! *sobs uncontrollably* Yes, Lucius is very scary. . . even though I *am* a bit off on his age. He's supposed to be 7 years older than the Marauders. Darn.  
  
Flyingpiggy: Yay! You loved it? *beams proudly* Well, this is as *at once* as the chapters can get, seeing as you probably just read 6 of them all at once. *wink*  
  
Luvhp224: yay! A new reviewer! But, of course, it was a review for chapter one, so it'll be a while before you actually read this. *scratches head*  
  
Valarauko: Sorry for the truckload of chapters. . . *grins sheepishly* Your stories look a bit lonely, just sitting there, unupdated. . . (hint, hint) Cheers! 


	20. Peter's Knife

AN: sorry for the delay. . . I've been making daily trips to the hospital, and couldn't find much time to update.  
  
Hope you like the chapter!  
  
~~~  
  
The door was unlocked.  
  
Rebecca stepped into the empty flat, thoroughly exhausted. She reached her hand into her pocket, her eyes struggling to adjust to the darkness. Out of instinct, she went for her wand to light it.  
  
She groaned and hit her forehead with the palm of her hand. She still had no wand.  
  
Giving up on light, she felt for the couch in front of her, and dropped down. She didn't intend on sleeping there, but now that she was already down, she didn't feel like getting up.  
  
Honestly, she didn't really care.  
  
She covered her face with a pillow in an attempt to rid herself of the pounding headache. She'd been walking through Diagon Alley with Remus for an hour, which would have been nice if it wasn't spent reliving the entire past month.  
  
Her head was throbbing with pain and stress. She'd told him everything. . .  
  
Everything except one small detail.  
  
She'd looked up into his face filled with a mixture of worry, pity and anger - that firm look in his eyes that wouldn't soften no matter what she said.  
  
She didn't have the heart to make him feel any more pain than he was already enduring. On the other hand, he would find out sooner or later, and it would be better if it were sooner.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
However, the next few weeks kept her busy enough to push away any thoughts of telling Remus what she hadn't told him before. She'd explained her story some umpteen times - she couldn't say no when everyone was just as genuinely concerned as the one before them.  
  
Along with other news, Rebecca had heard something about Lucius getting married to Narcissa Black. Clearly, he had signed the divorce papers Rebecca gave him.  
  
As Christmas drew nearer, it became even more suicidal to travel to London - what with all the crazed muggle shoppers everywhere. It was just as packed in Diagon Alley, but not as bad in Hogsmeade, seeing as how it was a bit more secluded.  
  
Luckily, the full moon didn't fall on Christmas or Christmas Eve, but the night before.  
  
Sirius, Peter and James all showed up at Remus's around six. Since they no longer had the Shrieking Shack, they would be using the woods behind his house.  
  
The only thing that bothered Remus (the others were, of course, unaware of this) was that these were the woods where he'd been bitten as a little boy.  
  
"What did you tell Lily?" Peter asked James. Lily knew about Remus suffering from lycanthrope, but she had no clue that James, Peter and Sirius accompanied him every month.  
  
James shrugged. "Said I had work for the Order."  
  
Remus laughed, "Well, at least you're at the right place for that."  
  
"Of course," Sirius said quietly, "we warned the members not to stop by headquarters tonight." He eyed Remus darkly.  
  
Remus frowned. He must have imagined the look Sirius gave him because the next instant, it was gone.  
  
"Well," said Remus after a moment. "We should probably go in before the moon rises. Get some cover so no one sees me."  
  
The other three nodded and plunged into the trees after him.  
  
They couldn't hear anything except the snapping of twigs under their feet and the distant hooting of wild owls who were just beginning to awaken.  
  
They had walked a far distance before they heard Peter cry out in pain. James, Sirius and Remus turned around and saw that Peter was clutching his arm as if it were bleeding.  
  
They stopped and gave him a questioning look. "Clipped by a branch," he muttered, hiding his arm from view. Pushing it aside, they continued deeper into the woods.  
  
Remus's gaze traveled upwards, and his eyes met the glow of the rising moon, filtering through the trees. An odd shiver passed through his body, and the hair on the back of his neck stood on end.  
  
The next time he looked down beside him, he saw not Sirius and James - but Padfoot and Prongs.  
  
He figured Wormtail was hiding in the bushes, like he always did when Remus transformed. But before he could think any further, the moon rose to a clearing in the branches - hitting him full blast.  
  
He stalled in mid-step, and the Marauders backed away as he began to transform. It was quick, but excruciatingly painful. He tentatively opened his eyes when he felt himself lower to all fours, and found himself staring down at his own paws.  
  
Fury and raw hunger overpowered his common sense, as it always did. A giant shaggy black dog growled at him, baring its teeth menacingly. Overcome with rage and the instinct to defend himself, he growled back.  
  
A stag emerged from behind a thick oak tree, and snorted loudly. It was much taller than the wolf, and definitely had an advantage over him. However, neither of the two animals attacked.  
  
His anger was ebbing away, corroded by the silence. He looked to both animals, whom he slowly began to recognize as his friends.  
  
He hung his head to show that he'd surrendered, and he heard Prongs exhale loudly.  
  
He waited for Wormtail to emerge from where he was hiding, but it never happened. Mentally shrugging, he figured he was somewhere around here. . .  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter apparated to the usual cave. He tried to refrain from looking at the sky - the face of the full moon would only remind him of who he'd left behind.  
  
His arm was still throbbing, but at least now he could let go of it.  
  
He heard hushed voices ahead, and before long, the voices became more distinguishable - forming words.  
  
"I am aware of that, Lucius." Peter recognized this voice as his master's.  
  
"My lord, it would not get in the way of our progress."  
  
"As a faithful servant, you will not question your master's decision. I will have her taken care of."  
  
"But - my lord,"  
  
"Crucio!"  
  
Peter turned away, but didn't dare cover his ears. The screaming and wailing pierced him like daggers. A man as distinguished as Lucius Malfoy, writhing on the ground in a fetal position was more than he could bear to watch.  
  
Finally, when the screaming stopped, Voldemort spoke again. "Rebecca Waters is of no matter now. We have more important people to watch out for, and to get rid of." He turned to Peter, and smiled. He was, of course, talking about the Order.  
  
"You're late," Severus Snape hissed in his ear, but Peter didn't do so much as glance at him. He was afraid that the moment he looked away from his master - the moment he turned his back - he would suffer the same curse as Malfoy.  
  
"Whatever information I can provide, I'm willing to," Peter said.  
  
Voldemort remained expressionless, and didn't answer. He only stood still, his eyes fixed on Peter. Peter made to look away, aware that Voldemort was raiding his thoughts, but it was too late, the dark Lord was smirking.  
  
"James Potter," he said, and Peter blanched. "I take it you know him well?"  
  
Peter, unaware of what to do, shook his head.  
  
"Don't lie to me," Voldemort replied lazily.  
  
Peter nodded his head. "Yes," he heard himself say.  
  
"It has been incredibly difficult to track him down," Voldemort said, giving Peter a sidelong glance.  
  
Peter lowered his eyes to the ground, and told the closest thing to the truth he could think of. "Well, he moves around a lot. I couldn't tell you where he was unless I was with him."  
  
"That can be arranged," the Dark Lord replied, clearly satisfied. Peter's breath was heavy with regret and hatred towards himself. He was slowly - ever so gradually - killing his own friends.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus, Peter, Rebecca, and Sirius spent Christmas Day at James and Lily's house. They could all tell that James was trying his hardest to enjoy it, but couldn't help but notice the dead look in his eyes every time he looked around the room.  
  
It was his first Christmas without his family, and everything - the stairs, the portraits, the furniture, even right down to every last doorknob - reminded him of them.  
  
Rebecca was overcome with an inexplicable joy when she opened her present from Remus; a wand.  
  
Sirius had acquired a number of gifts including a leather jacket, a multitude of anonymous love letters undoubtedly from girls who'd known him from school, and some Zonko's products.  
  
James had gotten a book called, "Pranks for Dummies" (this had earned Sirius a harsh glare) and another one called, "How to Annoy People and Get Away With It".  
  
Peter felt guilty for accepting gifts from people he would eventually hand over, but didn't complain. He opened the one from Sirius - it was an unbreakable pocketknife that never went dull.  
  
Finally, they came down to the last present, which was from Rebecca to Lily. When she opened it, she gasped, and everyone - except for James and Rebecca - looked absolutely befuddled.  
  
Lily was holding up light blue baby's pajamas. James was laughing softly, and Lily was looking incredulously at Rebecca.  
  
"How did you know?" she asked.  
  
Rebecca shrugged, smiling. "I have my ways."  
  
"Know what?" Remus asked, staring avidly at the small clothes.  
  
Lily was still looking at Rebecca, but a small bit of understanding was creeping into her face. "That I'm having a baby."  
  
"You are?" Sirius asked James, his eyes wide with excitement.  
  
James shook his head. "No, she is."  
  
Lily was frowning. "But they're blue."  
  
James frowned as well. "Hey, I like blue."  
  
Lily shook her head in exasperation. "No, I mean what if it's a girl?"  
  
"It won't be," Rebecca answered confidently.  
  
Lily started catching on, everyone knew Rebecca was a Seer, and her face became flushed with excitement. "When's he due?" she asked breathlessly, getting carried away with herself.  
  
Rebecca rolled her eyes. "Lily, I'm not that receptive."  
  
"Between a month and two years," Sirius offered thoughtfully.  
  
"Thank you, Padfoot," James replied sarcastically.  
  
Lily laughed quietly, and shook her head.  
  
"What?" James asked her curiously.  
  
"Oh, it's just you've been using those stupid names since, what, our fifth year?" Lily said.  
  
Rebecca nodded, turning to Remus. "Yeah, that's what I'd like to know."  
  
"Know what?" Peter replied, his voice cracking slightly.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes at them. "What your names mean, of course."  
  
There was a long pause while the four of them exchanged uneasy glances.  
  
"Well," Sirius began. "Moony's pretty obvious. Remus being what he is." Remus shot him a warning look, and James gave him a good kick.  
  
"So they do mean something!" Lily said triumphantly.  
  
James was shaking his head nervously. "No, the other names just - " he looked to Sirius for help. "Sounded cool," he finished.  
  
Lily seemed slightly put out by this, but Rebecca didn't buy it. Maybe it was her gift of Sight, or that she just couldn't help being skeptical - she somehow knew they were hiding something.  
  
*I was a Ravenclaw,* she told herself. *I can figure this out.*  
  
"So," Peter began nervously - breaking the silence that had settled. "Have any plans for today? Eh, James?"  
  
James's face fell even more. He looked intently at his friend and asked, "Why?"  
  
"James and I were going into Hogsmeade for lunch," Lily said, giving James a nudge in the arm. "Weren't we, James?"  
  
James snapped out of his trance. "Yeah," he replied distantly, his brow furrowed. He couldn't help notice that Peter was sweating - despite the fact that it was snowing outside and the window was open.  
  
AN: Wow. This chapter is dark, dark, dark. *grumbles* it's a full moon and I'm kinda hyper. But, unfortunately this isn't really a story off of sugar- highs. Gosh dang it!  
  
Oh well. Hope you like! Oh, and about the chapter title, I know it's weird, but I was suddenly obsessed with symbolism, so. . . yeah.  
  
Merry Christmas, and GO SEE RETURN OF THE KING! 


	21. Battles and Secrets

AN: Yay! A battle! (sort of, not really)  
  
~~  
  
The door to The Three Broomsticks opened, letting in a fresh blast of winter cold. Madam Rosmerta raised her head, and saw two familiar faces beaming back at her.  
  
"James!" she exclaimed. James smiled. Madame Rosmerta rarely called students or former students by their first name, but she knew him and Sirius quite well, seeing as they would sneak off campus to get a butterbeer every once in a while.  
  
"Miss Evans!" she continued, with a cheerful smile. James stole a quick glance at Lily. "It's Mrs. Potter now," she said.  
  
Madam Rosmerta looked taken a back. "Well that didn't take long, now did it?" she said, winking at the two. "What can I get you?"  
  
"Two butterbeers, thanks Rosie," James replied, handing her a handful of galleons.  
  
Together they walked off to a small table in the back. James held out the chair for her, and Lily had to keep a laugh from escaping her. James Potter - polite?  
  
Lily gave him an amused look before sitting down, but he kept his face grave and stolid as if he were preparing for a funeral. Lily sat in silence and watched James as he started picking lint off the tablecloth.  
  
"What is it, James? I know there's something on your mind," Lily said finally. He didn't say anything. Lily rolled her eyes. "I can see the wheels turning in your head - however slow they may be."  
  
James finally allowed himself a small smile. Lily relaxed - it was nothing serious. "What is it?"  
  
After a short while, he heaved a sigh. "I'm a father," he said, looking at the table as if he'd never seen anything like it before.  
  
Lily smiled - she almost laughed. "Yeah."  
  
James continued to stare at the table as if memorizing the patterns stitched into the cloth.  
  
"But don't go blaming me," she said, grinning broadly. "it *is* partly your fault." What Lily was intending to do, she'd succeeded at - James finally looked up from the table. He looked oddly amused and incredulous - clearly shocked by what she'd said, and the fact that it came from her.  
  
Lily shook her head. "You're a father. What's wrong with that, now?" James grew serious again. "I don't know. Nothing. Everything." He looked into her eyes, his face showing a faint panic. "What do I do?"  
  
"What your father did for you," Lily answered, hoping it made sense. It sounded like a good enough answer for a question she hadn't an answer to.  
  
James nodded, the panic subsiding, but his eyes remained wide. Madam Rosmerta came by with the drinks, gave a startled look seeing James's abrupt change of mood in the past five minutes, shrugged, and walked off.  
  
"Well," Lily said, tasting her butterbeer. "All we need is a name."  
  
"Harry," James replied immediately. Apparently he'd already given a lot of thought to this.  
  
"Harry?" Lily exclaimed, trying (and failing) to hide her disgust. "What kind of a name is that?"  
  
"Hey," James replied defensively. "Harry happens to be a fairly popular name."  
  
"Yes, well. Perhaps we should think of something more original?"  
  
"Like what?"  
  
Lily pondered briefly before replying, "Micheal."  
  
"Micheal?" James echoed. "You call that original?"  
  
"Well I suppose you have something better in mind?"  
  
"Yeah," James said. "Harry."  
  
Lily rolled her eyes. "We're getting nowhere with this," she said exasperatedly.  
  
"Well, there's something you've got right," James muttered.  
  
Lily eyed him sharply. "Alright," she said briskly with a look reminiscent of McGonagall. James wasn't sure whether to meet her with an equally testing glare, or cower back in fear.  
  
"Well, then we'll just have to solve things the Marauder way," she said giving James a coy look.  
  
"And how's that?" James replied.  
  
"We'll make a bet," she replied simply.  
  
James grinned. Now she was speaking his language. "What's the bet, then?"  
  
Lily opened her mouth as if to say something, but stopped short. She really didn't have a bet ready in her mind. At that moment, Peter stumbled into the pub, his face clearly showing raw fear and panic. He was mouthing wordlessly, and his eyes were wide as if he'd done something terribly wrong.  
  
"What is it?" James asked, standing up.  
  
"Leave!" Peter whispered urgently.  
  
"Peter, what - ?" But before James could finish, Peter had Disapparated.  
  
"What was that about?" Lily asked, her eyebrows knotted in concern.  
  
"I don't know," he replied, his voice trailing off as he thought.  
  
He felt another blast of cold air shoot through the pub, almost sounding like a collective gasp. He could almost hear screams around him - but he figured it was only his memories haunting him. . .  
  
"James," Lily breathed.  
  
"Hmm?" he grunted, only half-listening.  
  
"James!" Lily whispered desperately, her voice breaking in fear.  
  
The pleading, terrorized voice she had taken on caused James to break out of his reverie. That, and the feeling of the tip of someone's wand being pressed into his back.  
  
He stiffened, paralyzed by the fear that was starting to spread throughout his entire body. Forgetting to breathe, he turned around slowly. What met his eyes was so horribly familiar, he felt his heart stop.  
  
It was the man who'd killed his family a year ago today, come back to finish his work.  
  
He wasn't going to blow up the pub, no. Not a mass murder of every muggleborn in Hogsmeade - but a deliberate murder of one single person. Lord Voldemort saw him as his primary target at that very moment, and there was nothing he, James, could do to get in the way of what the Dark Lord had laid out for the day.  
  
This was a planned murder, no doubt. And he was merely a pawn cornered by a castle.  
  
He managed to glance sideways at Lily, who was gazing fearfully at Voldemort, silent tears streaming down her blanched face. Everyone else had fled the pub, leaving broken glass behind.  
  
"Hello, Potter," he said.  
  
James couldn't even manage a sound. *Leave, Lily. Just leave.* He looked again at Lily, who (no wonder she'd been sorted in Gryffindor) had her wand out, at the ready.  
  
This Voldemort noticed as well, and a simple wave of his hand took care of this. One wand out, and another in the opposite hand at his side, Voldemort spoke to James again.  
  
"Anything you'd like to say before I kill you?" James noted the cruel amusement hidden in these words.  
  
Only one thought occurred to him at the moment. "Dumbledore," he said, and the awful, twisted smile left the Dark Lord's face.  
  
"Dumbledore will defeat you, whether I am alive or dead." He heard Lily inhale shakily. *Leave, Lily. Now.* But she would not leave him without dying first.  
  
Voldemort lifted his wand, his blood-red eyes blazing with pure hatred. James closed his eyes and thought fleetingly of Harry, and whether he would have looked anything like him had he been born.  
  
But the words that reached his ears were not the words he'd expected to hear.  
  
"Crucio."  
  
His eyes snapped open when screaming filled his ears, but he felt no pain. The Dark Lord was looking straight at him, but his wand was pointed somewhere to his right.  
  
That's when James realized it was Lily screaming, and not him.  
  
Some incredibly reckless feeling akin to courage stirred inside of James. He brought out his wand - his intent being to kill - also aware that this was an insanely stupid thing to do, because - next moment - he, too, was without a wand.  
  
Voldemort, his hands becoming quite full - having to carry three wands - tossed James's and Lily's behind him. Lily's screaming and wailing was abruptly halted by a series of choking sobs and moans of pain.  
  
Voldemort's wand turned to James once again. "It'll be quick, Potter. Although, I can't guarantee it will be painless," he said. "Die now, or watch her suffer first."  
  
James - coming to a desperate measure of improvisation - finally resorted to his remaining power. His heart pounding like a raging stag, James ran forth towards Voldemort - great antlers erupting from his head.  
  
The antlers hit his opponent right in the chest, digging into his ribs. The Dark Lord was launched backwards, but otherwise not injured at all.  
  
"James!" Lily cried. According to her perspective, narrowed by pain and confusion, her husband had left her alone in a pub with a stag and a Dark wizard.  
  
Driven by an anger so intense, it was almost unfamiliar to him - Prongs reared back, ready to finish his opponent off.  
  
By now, Voldemort had gotten over his surprise, and his wand was back out. Before the stag's hooves could land, it was thrust backwards away from the Dark Lord.  
  
Losing his concentration as his head cracked on the edge of a table, James let his animagus form drop.  
  
Lily was halfway standing, looking down at James - or rather, the animal that had turned into James. Overcome with an exhausting confusion, she fainted. Voldemort stepped up, towering over James's huddled figure.  
  
James closed his eyes, all hope leaving him, but instead of hearing the curse that would kill him, he heard several shouts coming from the door to his left.  
  
He opened his eyes, and (with immense relief) saw familiar faces rushing into the deserted pub. In stepped about half of the Order, led by Frank and Alice Longbottom.  
  
Half a dozen death eaters were bound and levitated, floating before Caradoc Dearborn, who was guiding the unconscious bodies along.  
  
James glanced back to where Voldemort had been, but found there was no one there. The bloody coward had fled from his own scene.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"You're lucky Peter notified the Order," Remus said gravely, shaking his head. Sirius was scratching his chin with the tip of his wand, staring off into space, and Lily was asleep on the couch of their own home, with Rebecca sitting beside her, holding a waking potion.  
  
"But he knew about it before anything even happened!" James said with increasing exasperation.  
  
"Blimey," Sirius said with awe. "Who knew he'd really be that useful?" Remus laughed lightly, and Lily stirred.  
  
James exhaled loudly, giving up on his accusations. To be honest, the idea of Peter turning against them seemed rather absurd. Yet there was something odd. . . James couldn't put his finger on it.  
  
"Frank and Alice knew what to do, of course," Sirius said, quickly changing subjects. Remus nodded. "Seeing as they'd faced him twice before."  
  
"What about the death eaters Dearborn brought in?" James asked, his memory returning.  
  
"Oh," Sirius said, his face falling. "Them." Remus was laughing. "The truth is, Frank and Alice caught all of them. Sirius here was a bit disappointed.  
  
"Dearborn was merely an escort. I think he's watching the gits while they wait in London for their trial."  
  
Lily stirred again after swallowing the potion, and her eyes fluttered open. "Where's James?" she demanded instantaneously. Rebecca nodded her head towards James. Lily shot up.  
  
James was smiling at her, but she didn't smile back. "Where'd you go?" she asked.  
  
James hadn't expected that. A hug and kiss, maybe - a small greeting at the least. "I didn't go anywhere," he answered.  
  
Lily was frowning, looking around at everyone's concerned and curious faces. "But you left me, you were - "  
  
"I was with you the whole time," James replied firmly - afraid of where this was going.  
  
"But - but no. No, the deer!" she said, her eyes growing wide with remembrance. "The deer! You weren't anywhere, there was just some ruddy deer!"  
  
"She's out of it," Rebecca said fearfully, shaking her head slowly.  
  
"I am not!" Lily objected. "I know what I saw," she said, her accusing eyes blazing green, and shooting back at James.  
  
James sent an uneasy glance at Sirius - who shrugged, and then at Remus - who was shaking his head emphatically. The truth was, if their secret got out about their illegal escapades during school, Remus felt he would be held accountable for it. This, of course, was not true.  
  
*Honestly,* James thought. *The man has too much of a conscience.*  
  
"Well?" Becca and Lily prodded in near unison. They seemed to have noted the silent interchange between the three.  
  
"Padfoot," James said - addressing Sirius, but looking warily at Remus, who dropped his face in his hands. "You first."  
  
Sirius nodded, thought fleetingly of the giant black dog inside of him, and the two girls gasped when they saw that same dog take the place of Sirius.  
  
"Padfoot," Becca mused. The dog held a paw up, showing beneath it a padded foot. Lily turned numbly to her husband, her mouth hanging open. "And Prongs,"  
  
James nodded, and took his majestic form as well. Lily's breath caught in her lungs as she began to stand up, staring back at the tall creature.  
  
"James?" she asked quietly, tentatively reaching out her hand. When she saw that the deer - or stag, rather - did not protest, she gently stroked between the eyes. The stag snorted, and rubbed his nose against her hand. Her open mouth formed an awed smile.  
  
"It *is* you, isn't it?" she said with wonder.  
  
The stag nodded, and turned back into James. Lily stepped back, but James took her hand, and pulled her closer.  
  
"And you?" Becca asked Sirius, who turned back into his human form, nodding.  
  
"Peter's a rat," Remus said quietly from the corner, rubbing his temples with two fingers.  
  
"But - " Rebecca began. "Why? Why go through with all of this? It could have gone drastically wrong - "  
  
"It's my fault," Remus said with disgust. "They did it for me."  
  
James looked at him sharply. "It was our choice. We did it to help him when he transformed."  
  
Remus shrugged miserably.  
  
Lily nodded in understanding. However, all too soon, that familiar green blaze that James feared so much returned in her eyes. "And you didn't tell me?" she asked testily.  
  
James sighed with a deep foreboding. Any minute now, she was going to explode. "We - we didn't want anyone telling Dumbledore or McGonagall," he began desperately.  
  
"Oh, and that's what you thought I'd do?" she replied with an odd sort of haughty triumph.  
  
Becca glanced at Remus and then to the quarreling couple, and Disapparated. "Sorry, mate," Remus said miserably. Sirius conjured a bowl of popcorn, but Remus pulled him up from his chair, and they both Disapparated.  
  
"Come on, Lily. It was at least third year."  
  
"Third year, huh?"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"And what does that have to do with anything?"  
  
"I didn't know you back then!"  
  
"Well, you should have known me sooner," Lily snapped.  
  
"I know you now!"  
  
"Yes, and something had to slip before you'd even tell me!" Lily cried.  
  
"Look," James said finally, his voice hoarse from yelling. "You want to know exactly why I didn't tell you sooner?"  
  
Lily cocked her head to the side, her hands on her hips. "Why?"  
  
"Because I knew you'd blow up on me like this," he said, lowering his voice, hoping hers would lower as well.  
  
Lily stopped short. She knew she couldn't deny this, because - technically - she had just blown up on him.  
  
James sighed, relieved that this was finally going to die down.  
  
Lily looked miserable. "Damn you, Potter. You always have to get the last word."  
  
James was taken aback, but otherwise took it as a compliment.  
  
"And you know what's worse?" she said after a moment, turning to him sharply.  
  
"What?" James asked, afraid of what could possibly be worse. But instead of pointing out another of his faults in an attempt to revive the small war, she smiled. James could tell she was trying to hide it, and look angrily at him, but to no avail.  
  
"I actually sort of like the name Harry."  
  
~~  
  
AN: Review, and you just might win the lottery! If you don't have a ticket, then review anyways, and you just might find one in your pocket! *checks pockets*  
  
Nixiy: I just LOVE your reviews! Almost as much as I love my precious Dorito sandwiches! *hugs dorito sandwich* It's good to know my story can still be cute while being dark. *beams proudly*  
  
Nikki: No, Remus and Rebecca aren't dating. . . yet. . . Yes, I know, they are a bit slow and clueless when it comes to that, and for some reason it's making me laugh really really hard. Yay, Return of the King! 


	22. Dealing with Seers

AN: Okay, I'm getting a bit exhausted, so I might wait until the holidays are over to update again. (the key word being 'might'!!)  
  
Anyhoo, hugs to my reviewers (all two of you *sob*) All right, now for some change of PoV. . .  
  
~~  
  
They get worse every year. . .  
  
Of course, the teachers at Hogwarts were hoping the little brats would eventually die out, but every generation seemed to be making them twice as insanely impossible as before. It had been an enormous relief to all the teachers at Hogwarts when James Potter and Sirius Black had finally graduated, and left for good.  
  
But that meant the worst of them were on their way. Sure enough, the tidal wave of first year students had brought the seemingly innocent Bill Weasley into Hogwarts, and under the watch of very weary professors - still healing from the damage made by last year's graduates.  
  
"Over the years, the fine art of brewing and combining herbs and meticulous combinations of ingredients by specific instruction passed down for thousands of years has, most unfortunately, been simplified to mere 'Potion Making'," the professor began with an attempt to captivate the new class's attention.  
  
"What a shame," Bill Weasley said mournfully, but with a sardonic smile that suggested exactly the opposite. The comment went unnoticed, although the professor's eye twitched slightly before he continued.  
  
"It is an ugly disgrace beyond measure - "  
  
"Kind of like your mustache," Bill muttered with a grin. He looked around innocently as if he had no idea what had happened.  
  
"Your instructions," the professor said, waving his wand carelessly in the direction of the chalkboard behind him. The procedure for brewing a simple color-changing potion appeared, and the class silently went to work.  
  
By the end of the lesson, however, things had gotten out of control. To put it simply, the end result had been the equivalent of a food fight, except instead, potion ingredients were being pelted and flung across the classroom.  
  
Bill had a hand in this, it was true, though no one had a shred of proof against him. (Oddly enough, he later became a Gryffindor Prefect and Head Boy.)  
  
By the end of the week, three professors had announced retirement, leaving far too many teaching posts open all at one time. They agreed to stay the whole year, but they simply refused to stay for the next.  
  
Now, along with so many other things, it was Dumbledore's unhappy task to find a Potions teacher, Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher, and Divination teacher that, each of them, seemed promising to stay longer than the people before them.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Honestly, Albus," McGonagall said after hearing the news. "Defense Against the Dark Arts and Potions, that's understandable, but to find a true Divination teacher before the end of the year? The majority of people up to the job are just idiots who are delirious enough to think they can see the future!"  
  
Dumbledore sighed, ignoring his instincts to agree with her. "I must admit, Divination has rather lost its credibility at this school, but that is no reason to simply dismiss the course entirely."  
  
Despite his own words, he couldn't help but think it was a perfectly good reason to dismiss the course entirely.  
  
Yet, he found himself in the Hog's Head a few days later waiting for the interview to end. There had been only one person up to the job - by the name of Sybil Trelawney - and quite frankly, she was wasting his time.  
  
"I See," she said dramatically, waving her arms around in the smoke she had conjured in an attempt to make them look like spirits. "I See - I See danger. Yes, danger draws near. But, that is beside the matter. And, of course, I knew you were coming before I even saw the ad in the Daily Prophet. You are in need of my skills, are you not? Children cloud my Inner Eye, but, for the sake of bestowing my knowledge upon them," she hesitated dramatically, "I suppose I could try. Divination is not something you can teach, however, you must be born with the gift."  
  
Dumbledore nodded patiently, but couldn't help getting irritated. The witch was arguing with herself - saying she would teach, and then saying it wasn't possible. Even before that, she had been rambling.  
  
"I'm sorry," he said. "I'm afraid you do not reach our requirements. We may not even keep the class going after all."  
  
As swiftly as it came, she lost her air of mystery - having it replaced by irritation and impatience. "Well, I must say I've made much better use of my time," she exclaimed, clearly peeved by not being taken as seriously as she'd hoped.  
  
"Couldn't have said it better myself," Dumbledore replied heartily, standing up to leave.  
  
When he turned his back, however, a voice reached his ears that he had never heard before, yet it was altogether oddly familiar. "The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches," the harsh voice droned.  
  
Dumbledore turned around slowly, and saw that the witch's head was back and her eyes were rolling madly. At first, he thought the woman must be incredibly desperate for a job if she went to these lengths, but before he could conclude any further, the entranced witch continued.  
  
"Born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies." Indeed, the witch didn't seem aware of the fact that she was actually speaking. It seemed as if some greater force were speaking through her, leaving her body in a state of disarray.  
  
"And the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not." Dumbledore tried using means of Legilimency to find out whether this was some elaborate show she had rehearsed. But he found that presently, there was no mind to read - no conscience for lying. It was completely out of her hands what words came from her mouth.  
  
"And either must die at the hands of the other for neither can live while the other survives. . . the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies. . ."  
  
Moments later, the color rushed back into the witch's face, and her eyes came back into focus. She eyed Dumbledore strangely. "If there is nothing left to say to me, then I suggest you leave," she snapped.  
  
That's when it occurred to him that she had no memory of what had just happened only seconds before. *But was it a genuine prophecy?* he asked himself. He would have to wait until the seventh month came around. . .  
  
"I may very well have a place for you," he stopped, his mind whirling. He would need his pensieve when he got back to the school. "I'll send you an owl when I find out."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
This was the first report he'd gotten that seemed to be of real danger to him. And it wasn't a good feeling at all.  
  
"And?" Voldemort snapped when the death eater had fallen silent. "Born as the seventh month dies. . . what did she say then?" A wave of irritation overtook the Dark Lord when he noticed that the wizard before him was shaking with fear.  
  
"I - I do not know, my lord. I was caught before I could hear the rest - I'm sorry. I'm sorry, my lord. . ." The wizard continued to mumble nervous apologies over and over until Voldemort couldn't stand hearing it anymore.  
  
"You're useless," was all he said before killing the man.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus looked up from the large dining table the Order was assembled at. His eyes met Rebecca's radiant smile, and he quickly looked away. She really shouldn't be here. This was a meeting for the Order of the Phoenix. Of course, it wasn't his choice at all what she decided to do with her life - but he wouldn't let her throw away her life like he had. Remus had to admit that, despite his silent struggle, Rebecca had actually come up with some good suggestions for the Order.  
  
He didn't even realize the meeting was over until Dumbledore was shaking his hand. He forced a smile, and watched the people leave without much interest until all that remained were Lily, James, Peter, Sirius and Rebecca.  
  
"I really should go," Peter said suddenly, holding his arm tightly. Remus nodded indifferently, but James scowled. With a final glance at everyone, Peter Disapparated.  
  
Lily looked flushed with excitement. "Oh, Rebecca, you really should join the Order!"  
  
Remus shot her a sidelong glance, and fought to stay silent. Rebecca smiled brightly, and opened her mouth as if to agree, but much to Remus's surprise, she hesitated and shook her head.  
  
"I really shouldn't," she said miserably, her eyes out of focus. "At least not now." Lily wasn't one to question people's decisions, and standing by her side, neither was James - but Sirius certainly was.  
  
"Why not?" he asked her. "There's no doubt a Seer would help us a lot." Rebecca didn't answer right away, and it took Remus a while to notice that she was looking directly at him.  
  
"I - " she began nervously. This wasn't something she would like to admit openly, but at least it was only her closest friends - and not the entire Order. Would Remus hate her for this? Would he ask questions? "I'm due to. . . to have a baby."  
  
The silence that followed this statement was so empty, Rebecca was sure everyone could hear her breathing. She glanced at Remus - he didn't seem to be breathing at all.  
  
After slight hesitation, Lily beamed. "That's wonderful! I mean, we can go through this together!"  
  
"I hate to pry," Sirius said coyly. "But, may I ask who the father is?" He shot a suggestive glance towards Remus, who shook his head emphatically.  
  
Rebecca grew increasingly uncomfortable. "I, well, you all know I was forced into marriage, I mean, well. . ." It wasn't exactly easy to say her virginity had been forcibly taken, despite the fact that it was perfectly legal, since it was only her husband. . .  
  
Lily's eyes grew wide, as she began to understand. "I'm so sorry, Becca." She grew quiet due to a loss of words.  
  
For once, Sirius didn't have anything funny (or insulting for that matter) to say. He only smiled weakly, his face humbled and showing immense sympathy.  
  
"Do you want to talk about it?" James asked her. She smiled tremulously when she saw that everyone was so willing to help her. Nevertheless, she found herself shaking her head. "No, it's okay."  
  
"Alright, then," James said, getting the hint. He and Lily stood up, ready to leave. Lily hugged Rebecca, and when she pulled back she said, "Send me an owl, will you?"  
  
Rebecca nodded, watching them Disapparate. "If it's a boy," Sirius said, with his characteristic grin back in place. "Will you name him after me?"  
  
Rebecca let a small laugh escape. "Of course not," she replied facetiously. He glared jokingly before he left. The smile painted on her face gradually fell as the silence eroded it away. She turned around to face Remus, who was still sitting where he'd been before.  
  
He looked up at her, his eyes gray and unreadable. "Malfoy did this to you, eh?" he said, his mouth barely moving, and his face as hard as stone. Rebecca nodded slowly, her eyes brimming with tears.  
  
Remus stood when he saw the state she was in, and his eyes softened with concern. He took her by the shoulders and pulled her close to him protectively. "He didn't hurt you, did he?" He pulled back, and his face grew hard again.  
  
Rebecca started to shake her head, but stopped herself. She couldn't lie to Remus - somehow he always knew the truth, despite what she told him. She bit her lip as a way of saying 'yes'. He stepped forward, his hands holding her arms.  
  
But why was it so much more an issue with him than with James or Sirius or Lily? Why would it matter to Remus if she had a baby? Why was the pain she felt showing clearly in his face?  
  
As if it were an answer to her questions, Remus leaned in to kiss her, his arms extending around her waist. He stopped an inch before her lips, as if waiting for her permission. Closing her eyes, Rebecca closed the distance between them.  
  
All worries were swept away for a small instant, but only until the moment ended, letting everything painful rush back in.  
  
When she pulled back, she looked him in the eyes, willing him to meet her gaze. "Promise me one thing," she said, still in his arms. He nodded.  
  
"Don't go looking for him - Lucius, I mean." He nodded again. "Please," she added when she noticed he was looking away from her.  
  
He met her eyes, and sighed. "As long as you promise me something, too."  
  
"What's that?" she asked, losing herself in his gaze.  
  
"Don't join the Order," he said firmly. She came to herself, and pulled away. Her eyebrows raised and her mouth opened. "Why shouldn't I?" she exclaimed.  
  
"It's not worth it," he said darkly.  
  
"Are you saying it's a lost cause? Remus, I want to fight."  
  
He shook his head. "You can't throw your life away."  
  
"What, like you did?" she asked, slightly amused.  
  
He nodded his head, letting her words emphasize his own point. "Exactly like I did."  
  
Rebecca couldn't help taking his hurt look into consideration, but also couldn't help defending her own determination. This was something she wanted badly, and he wasn't about to stop her.  
  
She shook her head disbelievingly. "What have you got to throw away? Remus, you're only eighteen."  
  
"A little young to die, don't you think?" he replied, raising an eyebrow.  
  
"Sure, but what do you have to lose?" she answered him, searching his face for an answer. What she found told her enough that he didn't need to reply. "You," he said.  
  
Would she give this up for him? Her will, her decision, her spirit for fighting back against what took her family? She pleadingly shook her head, but he cut her off with a firm look. "At least let the baby come first," he said in compromise.  
  
She nodded. She could fight him then. But whatever thoughts of rebellion and fighting were swept away when he kissed her again.  
  
~~  
  
AN: yay! I don't know why, but this made me laugh. Call me weird, but I found it funny how they just kissed and she wasn't shocked or anything. I know that's my doing, being the author and all, but I just don't have the heart to go back and change it because it's so funny! *feeble laugh*  
  
Anyhoo, thanks for reading, I'd love to know what you think. (coughreviewcough) 


	23. Trading Traitors

AN: Odd chapter title, I know. It's getting very hard writing this story and obsessing over LotR at the same time. I keep wanting to put Merry and Pippin in somewhere, but I know that wouldn't work out too great.  
  
~~  
  
By the end of January, nobody had heard a word from Caradoc Dearborn since escorting the several Death Eaters from the Christmas attack on Hogsmeade to London for their prosecution at the Ministry of Magic. Indeed, none of them had shown for their trial, and it was assumed that Dearborn's disappearance was linked with their releases.  
  
By the end of the first week of February, there was no longer any doubt that he was dead - although they never found his body.  
  
When Severus Snape received the news that the teaching position for Defense Against the Dark Arts was open, he saw it as the opportunity he had been waiting for ever since he was a little boy at Hogwarts. Of course, his master saw it as an equally opportune chance, but for different reasons entirely.  
  
There was nothing Voldemort wanted more than to bring down Albus Dumbledore, and in order to do that, he would need a spy closer to him than Peter Pettigrew was. He needed to get past the castle walls that protected Dumbledore's knowledge. He needed to get someone inside Hogwarts.  
  
And Severus Snape was the perfect candidate, for no one knew (including Dumbledore) that he was a skilled Legilimens, taught by the Dark Lord himself.  
  
His ambition and thirst to prove himself worthy of his master's praise led Snape to the all too familiar grounds of Hogwarts, seeking out the Headmaster in response to the open teaching position. But the fate he sealed by stepping into the office of the most powerful wizard in the world was one he had not expected, even after carefully considering the consequences of what he was about to do.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snape was too busy to notice that Dumbledore was keeping far too much eye contact because he, himself, was trying to keep that eye contact in order to effectively raid Dumbledore's thoughts.  
  
But little did he know, that's exactly what Dumbledore was doing to him. "Which teaching position are you applying for?" he asked after a while.  
  
"I was hoping to get a job as a Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher," he replied, still boring into his mind, but to no avail. Was he an Occlumens? Was that why he couldn't get any information?  
  
Once again, he didn't notice how intently the Headmaster had been looking at him until he spoke again. "I like to know the background of a wizard before I have him work for me," Dumbledore said finally, the corners of his mouth twitching slightly with triumph.  
  
Snape still wasn't able to read his mind, but couldn't help but feel as if he were an egg cracked open - mainly because of the way Dumbledore was watching him imperiously. "You know my background. I was one of your students." This was, of course, obvious - but an adequate answer to evade any problems that might arise if Dumbledore knew what he was up to.  
  
And yet, he couldn't help but suspect that Dumbledore already knew everything. More than he did, in fact.  
  
"Yes, but I'm sure an ambitious Slytherin as yourself would have found something to get involved with since graduating."  
  
"I'm hoping to get involved in a teaching career, if that's what you mean," Snape answered firmly.  
  
Dumbledore stopped, ponderously stroking his beard. "It's a pity how many students turned out to become followers of Voldemort, don't you agree?" Dumbledore hinted, and Snape flinched at the sound of his master's name. He nodded, and Dumbledore squinted his eyes, as if trying to read small writing from a distance - yet, he was looking directly at Snape.  
  
"I hope you don't mind me speaking frankly, Severus, but I do not commonly hire Death Eaters to teach my students." Snape's eyes widened in panic. "And Defense Against the Dark Arts, I dare say. . ."  
  
"You have no evidence towards your accusation!" Snape exclaimed, pretending to appear insulted in order to hide the dread and alarm that was growing in his throat, making it hard for him to swallow.  
  
"Indeed," Dumbledore said, bringing out his pensieve. Snape watched in horror as he extracted a thought from his head, into the pensieve, and in turn, conjuring one of Snape's own memories - more precisely, his Legilimency lessons with Voldemort himself.  
  
A series of alibis rushed through his head, each of them increasingly harder to believe. Finally, after racking his brain into exhaustion, Snape allowed himself to recognize defeat. He mouthed wordlessly, but Dumbledore held a hand up to silence him.  
  
"I am a trusting man, and a man that believes strongly in second chances. I will employ you here as well as in the Order of the Phoenix, as we may have use for you. Of course, you will have to renounce your life as a Death Eater."  
  
Snape felt his jaw drop.  
  
"Or, I can turn you in to the Ministry, and let them deal with you now."  
  
It was not an appealing plan to Snape, especially because it wouldn't work. "I would be killed." He sat up proudly, ready to die or rot in prison, knowing it would earn him the glory of his master's approval. "The Dark Lord would never let me back out, and I will not."  
  
And, Snape thought, surely Voldemort would grow more powerful over time and save his worthy followers from Azkaban.  
  
"Don't think I haven't killed dark wizards before," Dumbledore said finally, his kind demeanor quickly being replaced by that of an aura of great power. He was, of course, speaking of Grindelwald. Snape said nothing, all thoughts of honor and glory fleeing from his mind.  
  
"Now, I suggest you reconsider my proposition. I can offer you Occlumency and confidentiality to ensure your safety in Lord Voldemort's presence, as long as you reveal nothing to his side, and everything to ours."  
  
Snape wouldn't let himself nod his head for fear of moving, but didn't shake his head either, for fear of what might become of him if he did.  
  
"There is no need to promise me with your word - I'll know exactly when you are lying. I have a certain likeness to Voldemort in that aspect, yet I doubt he would be this forgiving."  
  
Yes, something did make them immensely different - compassion. And that compassion was what kept Dumbledore from killing him on the spot. There was no doubt he would have deserved it - thinking he could walk into this school without any risks or consequences. Yet, in the end, it was compassion that saved him not only from this, but from a loose werewolf two years ago. . . It was, altogether, an unfamiliar concept to him, but still, he couldn't help but feel grateful that it existed at all. Finally, he heard himself say, "Yes."  
  
Dumbledore smiled slightly. "Consider it binding, then. I'm afraid the position has been filled for Defense Against the Dark Arts by Mr. Fenwick, but don't even think about backing out now. I'll fill you in for Potions teacher, if you don't mind."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Despite the growing fear of his master coming for him, silencing him with death, Snape found it oddly satisfying to reveal so many secrets he had withheld for so long. Surely, he wouldn't be accepted by the members of the Order, but it didn't matter to him. He certainly hadn't done this to make friends.  
  
He went down the list of names he knew, leaving a few out of course, but in the process, he hit a snag.  
  
Peter Pettigrew, the ever-so-faithful friend of James Potter.  
  
Everything discussed in Death Eater meetings was disturbing to him, he had to admit, but there was one thing he took pleasure in. And that was the planned destruction of James Potter. He could almost taste the sweet irony revenge would bring if he were the one to bring James Potter to his death.  
  
For that reason, he told no one about Peter Pettigrew, and using the Occlumency Dumbledore had recently taught him, no one ever found out that he was holding back anything at all.  
  
Of course, he couldn't give the names away all at once - that would be too conspicuous, and surely the Dark Lord would quickly grow suspicious. But there were some names he didn't intend on giving away at all.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James scowled at the table. He couldn't bring himself to look at the nasty traitor before him. Couldn't Dumbledore tell that everything Snape said was a lie? Almost everyone around him seemed to be thinking the same thing.  
  
Moody was gritting his teeth and shooting furtive glances at Dumbledore, Sirius was extraordinarily silent, Peter looked horrified, Frank and Alice were sharing worried looks, and yet Dorcas Meadowes seemed incredibly trusting.  
  
"Have you heard anything about Dearborn?" she asked with rapt attention and unwavering confidence. Sirius was slightly stunned - especially since she'd gone to Hogwarts with them and knew exactly how much of a creep the slimy git was.  
  
Snape was also surprised that she trusted him so much. "Yes, actually. Dead. Heard some people bragging about it not too long ago," he said casually.  
  
Emmaline joined the number of people glaring at the convert. She'd been on the brink of engagement with Caradoc, it was true, and she loved him deeply - and to hear this man speak of his death so lightly was an insult to his memory. Hate showed clearly from her eyes - only slightly blurred by her growing tears.  
  
Peter was struggling to keep his body from shaking. He was doomed - Snape, and Snape only, knew the truth about him. He would surely turn him in.  
  
"It has been agreed that we will not track down the death eaters all at once," Dumbledore said. Snape nodded. "Especially since half of them I don't know," he muttered.  
  
"Exactly how many are there?" Gideon Prewett asked skeptically, as if challenging Snape to make something up off the top of his head.  
  
"No one knows every name - exactly for these reasons I stand before you today - but I'd say roughly four hundred, not counting the dementors and giants."  
  
Hagrid lowered his gaze to the floor. A weighty silence stretched while the members struggled with disbelief, distrust and mild panic. The odds were against them twenty to one - that is, if Snape was being honest.  
  
"Another reason to be wary of who we welcome in our home," Dumbledore said gravely, despite the statement's somewhat amusing nature.  
  
The group nodded numbly, except Snape and Peter - who shared a brief glance. Peter swallowed loudly, yet no one seemed to notice. This was Snape's chance to turn him in.  
  
"I declare this meeting over," Dumbledore broke the silence with a casual air, yet concealed worry. "Good day to you all." Dumbledore lingered until everyone had left, and with a grave nod at Remus, finally Disapparated.  
  
Sighing deeply, Remus stepped into the next room, and saw that someone was already there.  
  
"Oh, hello Remus," Rebecca said offhandedly as if she were busy with something, but was standing solitary in the center of the room with nothing better to do than watch her shoes.  
  
"What are you doing here?" he asked, stalled in mid step.  
  
"Nice welcome you have there for me," she said coolly, but otherwise smiled at him.  
  
"Were you listening to the meeting?" he asked in mild surprise.  
  
Becca shook her head. "I'm a Seer, I wouldn't need to eavesdrop to know what's going on. And besides, what's wrong with having a friend visit you every once in a while?"  
  
"Well, nothing," Remus said uncomfortably. "I was just surprised."  
  
Rebecca smiled. "I need a name," she said in a business-like tone. Remus only blinked, not having a clue as to what she might be talking about. "For my child," she added.  
  
Remus shrugged. "James is a good name." To this Rebecca laughed. "Of course if I asked James he would say the same thing," she said with a wry smile. "But no, it's a girl, I can tell."  
  
"Well, then. . . Jasmine. That's a good name."  
  
"Jasmine?" Rebecca repeated incredulously.  
  
Remus looked slightly disappointed. "Stupid, I know,"  
  
"No," Rebecca said, cutting him off. "Jasmine," she mused. "I like it. We can call her Jamie for short."  
  
Remus gave a small nod before actually catching her words. He almost blurted out 'we?', but thought better of it. It was strange how she was coming to him for advice over anyone else, and yet it seemed perfectly natural at the same time.  
  
And yet, Remus knew she hadn't come over just to come up with a good name. "Becca," he said.  
  
"Hm?" she replied distantly.  
  
"What'd you come here for?" he asked.  
  
She suddenly turned on him with an odd look on her face. It seemed like a cross between stubbornness and concealed anticipation. "You confuse me," she said bluntly.  
  
"How so?"  
  
Rebecca sighed, as if hoping she wouldn't have to explain further. "Well, you kiss me, and then - and then you act like nothing happened."  
  
Remus froze. Was this his fault? "Er. . . sorry?"  
  
Rebecca shook her head. "No! No, it's a good thing. . ." She paused and looked back up at him. "I just didn't know if it meant anything to you."  
  
Was she nuts? "Of course it did. If it didn't mean anything I wouldn't have done it."  
  
"Then?" Rebecca asked.  
  
Remus shrugged. "What else is there to it? It's not like we have to keep it a secret."  
  
Rebecca let a wide smile spread across her face. All the worries about death and terror left her mind. It almost felt like she was at Hogwarts again.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter met with the Death Eaters because he had to, and only because he had to. Snape, however, had a purpose. It almost made Peter resentful, and yet the thought of telling Dumbledore what he'd been doing all the while terrified him beyond reason.  
  
Peter gave Snape a sidelong glance full of disdain. Why did he get to escape from death while Peter sold his soul? Gathering all the courage and bitterness he could muster, Peter stepped up to Snape's side.  
  
"I ought to turn you in to him right now," he whispered shakily, nodding towards the Dark Lord, who was currently speaking to the assembled group.  
  
Snape smiled grimly without turning his head. "I'll turn you in to Dumbledore if you do."  
  
"Not if you're dead," Peter retorted out of the corner of his mouth, surprised by his own words.  
  
Snape turned his head slightly, his eyes still fixed on his master. The smile was completely gone from his face now. "I believe we have an agreement, then?" Snape said, struggling to keep the desperation out of his voice.  
  
But before Peter could answer, his master stepped forward, speaking directly to him. "But we won't let that happen again, will we, Wormtail?"  
  
Peter shook his head, and lowered his eyes - even though he had no idea what he was agreeing to.  
  
"It's suspicious how quick the Order found me," he said, and Peter didn't look up, for fear of eye contact. His master would surely know of his betrayal if he brought his head up.  
  
"Face me, Wormtail." Overcome with a spasm of fear, Peter collapsed to the ground, trembling and muttering desperate pleas.  
  
To his relief, his master said, "I will not kill you, for I still have use for you." With that, he resorted to torture.  
  
Of the countless times Peter had watched his fellow Death Eaters suffer this very curse, he'd never imagined the pain would exceed the horror that showed from his face. After what seemed like an eternity, the feeling of twisting knives stopped, and the air rushed back into his sore lungs.  
  
The Dark Lord dismissed the assembled group, and didn't even wait for Peter to stand before Disapparating, himself. To his surprise, when Peter stood, he found that Snape remained behind.  
  
Snape glanced around to make sure they were alone. "You will *not* tell the Dark Lord about me," he whispered dangerously. "Will you?" he added uncertainly as Peter hesitated.  
  
Wincing with pain, Peter replied, "As long as in return. . ." He stopped to catch his breath, "You teach me to defend my mind." Snape sighed heavily. He didn't know what to call himself - a traitoring traitor, a double agent, or just a confused man. This certainly wasn't a friendship, but a silent agreement to spare each other. Finally, he nodded his head.  
  
~~  
  
AN: There. Whatcha think? I've been stuck halfway through the next chapter for weeks, and I'm not any closer to finishing it. So please review. I need the encouragement.  
  
Reviews! Woohoo!  
  
Nixiy: Yeah, I guess Michael Potter *does* have a nice ring to it, doesn't it? Thanks for the compliment on writing about Remus. It really gets hard after a while to keep him in character.  
  
DragonPrincessNikki: Hey, you! How could I be so STUPID?? You *told* me in your review what was going to happen in your story - I just noticed that now. Please forgive me? Pweeze? Haha, anyhoo. . . I guess now you know that the child is (??) Jamie. Yeah, she's the main character of the first story, so, yeah. Don't go jumping to conclusions *just* yet. James and Lily still have a year, and regarding Rebecca's life, I'm only half-way through. *sighs* What have I gotten myself into??  
  
L. Meylan: OMG! Another review! *hugs reviewer to death* Thank you so much! Sorry it took so long to update. My grandma came down to visit and she's been making me work like a hamster on a wheel. (Does that simile make any sense to you? Because I'm not so sure myself)  
  
Rebecca Lyn: You have such a cool name. Honestly, you do. Anyhoo, yeah, as you can tell, the baby's Jamie. Yay! Now I can finally get this story *going*!!  
  
Flyingpiggy: *pokes head around the corner* hello? 


	24. Vengeance and Cookies

AN: When I wrote the chapter, it was extremely long. So I cut it into two chapters. This one's just crescendo-ing up to the next one. The next one is the third (and final) defiance. Hope you like them!  
  
S* Penweaver: Um. . . I don't *think* I'm JK Rowling. In fact, I'm pretty sure I'm not. I take it as an immensely flattering compliment, though. Glad you like the story, hope this one's worthy of JKR-ness.  
  
Nikki: Hmmm. . . if you have some extra time, and don't mind reading a 21- chapter story, then you can read all about Jamie in "Like an Open Window". It's completely up to you, though. Thank you *so* much for the encouraging thought on my writing. It's nice to know it's at least a bit less pathetic than before ;)  
  
Rebecca Lyn: Thanks for the input on the chapter title. I was a bit iffy on it. It sounded corny to me, but at least you liked it. Maybe I'm just too hard on myself.  
  
Nixiy: Ergh. That's happened to me before. (the message from ff.net saying I've already reviewed) Um. . . I guess you could drug them and marry them (to each other), but that would drastically affect my story, so please don't. Yes, it is frustrating, but I love making idiots out of the characters. It's so fun!  
  
~~  
  
"Let's see, Lily's having a baby, Rebecca's having a baby," Dorcas said now holding up two fingers. "Frank and Alice Longbottom," she held another finger up, "Edgar Bones's wife. . ." She stopped to search her memory.  
  
"Not to mention my sister," Lily muttered.  
  
"And that," Sirius exclaimed with a grand entrance into the room, "is why I say we should celebrate. Come on, drinks all around!" He hauled in a large crate full of Ogden's Old Firewhiskey.  
  
"Sirius!" Rebecca exclaimed. "What an awful thing to suggest for pregnant women! Have you a brain at all?"  
  
James smiled and stood up. "I think it's safe if I help you finish it off, if they won't."  
  
Sirius stood in front of Dorcas, offering her a bottle. She took it just to humor him, but never opened it.  
  
"You, Moony?" Remus shook his head. Sirius and James grinned. Remus shook his head again.  
  
James looked into the crate and frowned. "Five of them are missing!"  
  
Sirius hiccupped.  
  
Remus was still shaking his head, sighing wearily. "Sirius, this is Order Headquarters. Get drunk at your own place."  
  
Sirius held a finger up. "Definitely not. This was precisely my plan. People are going to show up sooner or later." And sure enough, not long after, Gideon and Fabian Prewett and Emmaline Vance were there.  
  
Remus shot Rebecca a meaningful look, but she only gave a wry smile. "It isn't a meeting yet, now is it?"  
  
"What's this?" asked Gideon, giving the crate a small kick.  
  
"Drinks!" Fabian exclaimed, and grabbed two for himself.  
  
"You know what I think," Sirius said to James, his voice slurring already. "I think Remus fancies someone." Dorcas stood up to steady Sirius as he nearly fell over.  
  
"Yeah I do," Remus said, grabbing Rebecca's hand. She beamed, trying (and failing) to hide her joy.  
  
"Hey, what do you think you're doing?" Sirius asked loudly when he saw Dorcas approach the crate of Firewhiskey.  
  
"My bottle's empty," she said sheepishly, holding up the bottle.  
  
Sirius grinned. "I wonder how that happened?" he said. Dorcas shrugged her shoulders, smiling, and took another one.  
  
More members visited, some refusing their offers firmly and others rather enthusiastic to join in. Before long, it was a party - which was exactly what Sirius had been hoping for.  
  
By the time the drinks started taking affect, Lily looked furious and especially annoyed. She practically had to drag James away from the Firewhiskey before convincing him to leave with her.  
  
It was impossible to say how many drinks Sirius had had, but it must have been more than enough because by the time people were leaving he was kissing Dorcas passionately. She was so insanely drunk herself that she didn't slap him like she would have.  
  
Poor Remus lived here, so there was no escape. He was incredibly relieved when everyone left - not just because of the hassle, but because at nightfall, he'd transform.  
  
It didn't occur to him until after everyone was gone that he was going to be alone. Then a stronger fear took over when he saw Rebecca cleaning up the room.  
  
"Go home," he said quickly, and a little harsher than he'd intended. He quickly glanced outside - it was already dark.  
  
"Excuse me?"  
  
"The moon's full. Go home, and send James an owl for help. Don't even bother with Sirius." And with that, he ran from the house, as far into the trees as he could.  
  
Of course, Sirius wouldn't be able to come, but at least there was a chance that James wasn't too drunk to help a friend out.  
  
He stopped and leaned against a tree to catch his breath, glancing warily at the moon. He tried to stay under the shade of the forest's thick branches overhead, thinking that maybe he could hide from the moonlight.  
  
His breathing finally began to slow, and his heartbeat reduced to its normal rate, but before he could actually relax, a sharp pain exploded in his side - spreading throughout his body. The last thing he heard was the sound of rustling leaves before he fell to the ground, and his own screaming filled his ears.  
  
When he got to his feet, he found that he couldn't stand - the moon was hitting him full blast. He remained on all fours, and tried desperately to keep control over himself, when a familiar stag emerged from the bushes.  
  
He would have said something, except for the fact that he couldn't talk. The stag bent its front legs in a bow, and then the back legs did the same, so it was lying on the ground.  
  
The wolf decided to rest on the ground as well in hopes that he could sleep away this nightmare.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
As luck would have it, Dumbledore called for a meeting the next morning.  
  
James sent an owl saying Lily had morning sickness due to pregnancy, which was understandable and easily dismissed. Dorcas looked tired as if she'd been throwing up all night (which she probably had been). Sirius didn't show up at all.  
  
The meeting wasn't very productive - it was full of congratulations for the Longbottoms and for Edgar Bones and his wife, and people wishing Benjy Fenwick well with his new teaching job. Nobody even mentioned a word about Snape, except noting that he hadn't shown.  
  
Dumbledore told them that he had previous engagements, and everyone assumed that meant he was meeting Voldemort and his followers. No one seemed to notice Peter's absence - not even Remus or Dumbledore - so nothing was said of the coincidence.  
  
Seeing as there was nothing of real importance to say, the meeting was ended quickly. Remus sat at the table after the members had left, thinking about James and Lily. Eventually, his thoughts led to Rebecca.  
  
If Lily wasn't feeling all too well, maybe Rebecca was just as bad. Remus felt a twinge of guilt at the thought that she was alone with no one to care for her.  
  
He couldn't for the life of him cook a thing so he resorted to conjuring a plate of cookies, and Disapparated.  
  
He arrived at the front door of her flat, and knocked quietly. He noticed with dismay that the cookies were peanut butter. Rebecca hated peanut butter. But before he could change it, the door opened.  
  
"Hi," he said nervously.  
  
"Cookies!" was all she said before letting him inside.  
  
"They're peanut butter," he began sheepishly.  
  
"Oh, that doesn't matter. I could eat anything these days." She took a seat on the couch slowly, and Remus sat opposite of her.  
  
"You doing okay?" he asked after a while.  
  
Rebecca smiled, and put the plate of cookies down. "Worried about me, are you?"  
  
Remus nodded.  
  
Her smile brightened. "I'm fine. At least for now." She laughed. "You know, you're visiting me so often now, you might as well be the father."  
  
Remus kept his eyes from widening. "If you want," he said, a little unprepared for that.  
  
Rebecca gave a small laugh, and turned back to the cookies. "Did you make these?"  
  
"If I had, they'd look like rocks."  
  
"I'd eat them anyway."  
  
"You sure?" Remus asked her, a small grin spreading across his face.  
  
She nodded. "Thank you," she said, beginning to stand up.  
  
"No, don't get up, I'll just leave."  
  
But she got up anyways. "So soon? You just got here."  
  
"Well, I came to bring the cookies."  
  
"You aren't upset with me, are you?"  
  
Remus froze. "No. Why?"  
  
Rebecca sighed, ignoring the question. "You won't think of me differently? You know, having a child to care for, and all. You'll still visit, won't you?"  
  
Remus closed his eyes, and shook his head. *Why did she worry so much?* He took her hands in his. "Of course, Becca."  
  
She narrowed her eyes, and lowered her head. "You sure? Because, I was thinking for a while it was all out of pity."  
  
Remus rolled his eyes. "Is there any way to make you happy?"  
  
She smiled and stepped forward, nodding her head slightly while she brought her hand behind his neck and kissed him. For the first time in more than a year, her vision went blank and a series of images flashed in her mind over and over. It took her a while to slow them down.  
  
She found herself in a wedding dress. She was quickly replaced by a small girl, laughing and singing. The girl suddenly looked older, and tears were streaming down her cheeks. Another girl appeared, with blonde hair like Remus's. She was standing alone.  
  
Rebecca saw herself once again in a wedding dress.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The Dark Lord was livid, and didn't at all refrain from taking it out on everyone around him. Peter desperately tried to clear all emotion from his mind while his master was shouting threats and curses.  
  
"Anyone, *anyone*, who I find in questionable company will be punished for their stupidity," he spat. "It has come to my attention that there is a leak in our security." Peter shut his open mouth quickly, and cast his eyes downward. Even Snape couldn't help but feel a twinge of fear.  
  
Voldemort acquired an almost satisfied look when he noticed how uncomfortable the group had become. "Though, what disappoints me is that I had to figure this out for myself. None of my followers found it suiting that they should bring it to my attention. Though, I must say I've known it all along. Why else would I fail miserably every time I went after the Potters?"  
  
Peter closed his eyes in an attempt to subdue his fear. He let his mind empty itself of any thought, and then his master spoke once more.  
  
"Any thoughts?"  
  
Peter opened his eyes once more, and glanced around. To his horror, someone stepped forward, though they kept their mask on. "My lord, may I suggest someone in close company with James Potter? I've known Peter Pettigrew all my days at school, and I have to admit that back then, him and his stupid little friends were inseparable."  
  
Peter didn't move an inch, and the only thing he let his mind acknowledge was that the voice sounded female and somewhat familiar. He felt everyone's eyes on him, though he relentlessly stuck to his Occlumency, and refused to let his own fear overpower him.  
  
He glanced quickly at the Dark Lord and saw that his lidless eyes were boring into his. He struggled to remain impassive.  
  
"I think it's safe to say why the Order's on to us," the Death Eater continued with a hint of excitement. "He's the only one among us in contact with them."  
  
To Peter's surprise, Snape stepped forward as well. "Good point, though I must add one thing, Bellatrix." The Death Eater (who in fact turned out to be Bellatrix Lestrange) took off her mask, scowling.  
  
"I believe you are in close relation with Mr. Potter's best friend, Sirius Black," Snape continued, his face cold and unreadable.  
  
"He's my cousin!" she retorted with disgust.  
  
"But he's family nonetheless," Snape replied calmly.  
  
Voldemort turned his attention slowly to the witch in question.  
  
"He is, as far as I'm concerned, not my family!" she cried indignantly, with a slight edge of panic. "This is my family, and I will remain loyal to it." She shot an accusing look towards Peter.  
  
Voldemort watched her with narrowed eyes for a minute, and then turned to Snape, and then to Peter. He seemed to come to no conclusion, which apparently inspired immense frustration in him.  
  
"Very well, then. I will confide none of my plans to any of you, and no one will get in my way. James Potter will die before anything can go wrong."  
  
He gave a firm nod of dismissal, and the group Disapparated hastily. Peter closed his eyes in preparation to leave, but found that he couldn't. He tried again, but still found himself standing in the same cave.  
  
"Wormtail," his master called. Peter turned around, and saw that the Dark Lord had his wand out, restraining him from Disapparating.  
  
"Yes, my lord?" he replied, his mouth going dry.  
  
"You will tell me where he is when I ask it of you."  
  
~~  
  
AN: I got really confused when I wrote this. I wasn't sure if Snape was doing the right thing by saving Peter right there. It was a good thing to do, and made Snape seem a bit more human, but it would have been better if Peter had actually been discovered and killed.  
  
And yet I'm writing Peter almost as if he's a good guy, and I really need to stop that. He's a git. *author repeats to herself* He's a git, he's a git, he's a git. . .  
  
Oh, I'm really excited about the next chapter. Brace yourselves, I'm gonna kill off a character. (not that I want to, or anything) It's sad, but I've been working on it for a while now.  
  
Review! 


	25. A Willing Sacrifice

AN: I might not post for a while. Writer's block. . . ergh. Happy reading!  
  
~~  
  
Rebecca wasn't sure what it was, but she'd been feeling very strange since her most recent vision. It was as if she could close her eyes, and still see the room around her. She hadn't felt this receptive in years. She wasn't sure exactly, but she thought it might have been because of the child she carried within her.  
  
Her daughter would be born with the same gift.  
  
Exhausted, she slowly lowered herself onto the sofa. For a few moments she strayed between reality and imagination, but eventually, sleep got a hold of her, and her breathing slowed. Her thoughts and worries turned to blurry images, which soon gave way to dreams.  
  
But everything was halted when her sleeping vision turned black. What she heard and saw next was too clear and real to be an outcome of her imagination. She tried to reach out, but her arms wouldn't leave her side. She opened her mouth to let out a cry of grief, but no such sound was heard in the sleeping realm.  
  
James and Lily lay before her - dead.  
  
She woke up in an instant to find tears already streaming down her face.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The weary members of the Order of the Phoenix sat in their chairs with an air of fatigue and foreboding.  
  
Dumbledore conducted the meeting as usual, with quick announcements, and then speculation, which would hopefully become actual plans of action. Peter listened closely for any news worthy of reporting to the Dark Lord. Since the previous day, he'd become devoted to finding a way to regain his master's trust.  
  
Remus was subconsciously thinking about Rebecca when that very person burst through the doors into the dining room they were assembled in.  
  
"Miss Waters?" Dumbledore said with an inquisitive raise of his eyebrows.  
  
"I'm really sorry about this, Dumbledore, but it couldn't wait," she said, glancing apologetically at Remus.  
  
Moody glared shiftily, his eyes hooded with suspicion. "Who is this?" he growled. "We can't have people busting into our meetings like this. What if she heard something?"  
  
"She can be trusted," Dorcas countered firmly, and Moody sat back in contemptuous defeat.  
  
"What is it, Becca?" Lily asked with quiet concern.  
  
"You," Rebecca replied breathlessly.  
  
"What about her?" James snapped protectively.  
  
"You, too. Voldemort's after you. Now."  
  
Snape swore under his breath so no one could hear. She was ruining everything he'd been hoping would stand. Dumbledore's head snapped in Snape's direction. "Why didn't you notify us?" he asked him softly, but with hidden tones of accusation.  
  
"I didn't know," Snape replied untruthfully, casting his eyes downward.  
  
Moody rolled his eyes. "Well, if a Death Eater didn't know about his own master's plans, then how does she?" he asked, indicating Rebecca with an impatient nod of his head.  
  
"I - I saw it in a dream," she replied uncomfortably.  
  
"A dream?" came the sarcastic reply.  
  
"A prophetic vision, if you will," Remus interrupted calmly.  
  
"What will you have us do, Dumbledore?" Lily asked in a small voice.  
  
The aged wizard sighed heavily, his eyes unfocused in deep thought. "I'm not sure how he'll find you, so there's no way I can hide you from him."  
  
Rebecca leaned against the wall, her hand trying to subdue her pounding heart.  
  
And then, without warning, Dorcas Meadowes stood from her seat, wand in hand, her eyes blank and unreadable. "I think I have a plan."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Where is he, Wormtail?"  
  
"The Leaky Cauldron," Peter replied miserably. He emptied his mind of all thought, so his master wouldn't know about Peter's last meeting with the Order.  
  
"Is that all you require of me, my lord?" Peter asked, keeping any hope out of his voice.  
  
His master gave a foul smirk that twisted his gruesome features. "You'd rather not stay to watch?"  
  
Peter's eyes widened in horror. "N - no my lord. I was only thinking that, well, maybe someone from the Order might see me, and - "  
  
"You don't think I would kill them as well?"  
  
Peter grew increasingly uncomfortable. "Well, someone might be watching, and we wouldn't know, and - "  
  
"Very well," his master snapped. "Leave, if you lack the nerve."  
  
Peter frowned, and Disapparated.  
  
Voldemort proceeded with a belligerent determination. Focusing inwardly on himself, he Apparated to the Leaky Cauldron.  
  
And there, just as his servant had told him, sat James Potter, holding an empty glass. Strangely, the entire pub was already deserted, and yet Potter's lone figure did not flee.  
  
Voldemort drew out his wand, advancing on the younger wizard. It was odd to see him without anyone else around him - not even his wife - and for him to be watching his predator with such immense calm.  
  
"Are you ready to die?" Voldemort asked with sick pleasure. James didn't react, holding a certain mix of smugness and foreboding gloom.  
  
"I am," he replied, standing up and setting down the glass - which was still smoking from the contents it had been holding.  
  
Voldemort stalled. This was too easy. He raised his wand uncertainly, wishing the struggle would have been more brutal and satisfying.  
  
"Avada Kedavra."  
  
James received the blow without any sign of defense, only closing his eyes with acknowledgement of his own doomed fate.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sirius ran into the room with alarm. "James already left?"  
  
Lily nodded. "He didn't want me to come, he wouldn't let me."  
  
Rebecca shook her head. "Well, you really shouldn't."  
  
Lily clenched her teeth angrily when she felt tears reaching her eyes. "What if something happened to him? I want to be with him."  
  
Sirius stopped suddenly. "Lily, you'd only bring your son to his death," he said - so darkly, that it surprised Lily beyond reason. She nodded her head submissively. "You're leaving, too?"  
  
Sirius nodded gravely, and Disapparated.  
  
Lily sat in silence, only to be distracted by a small gasp from beside her. Rebecca brought a hand to her mouth, her eyes still closed. "He said it," she whispered.  
  
"V-Voldemort?"  
  
Rebecca nodded, horrified. "I can still hear it in my head."  
  
"You mean, he did it? He killed - " Lily's voice trailed off, and she felt her body shudder, tears flowing silently down her cheeks. Rebecca came forward, and they hugged each other, seeking comfort in such a dark hour.  
  
"It was a willing sacrifice. It was the only way."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The Dark Lord gazed down imperiously over his enemy's dead body, only to be distracted by a loud cracking sound which indicated someone Apparating into the room. He spun around, wand at the ready. But what he saw next made him drop everything entirely and step back clumsily.  
  
There stood James Potter, very alive, his eyes blazing and his wand pointing right between Voldemort's eyes.  
  
A loud crack sounded again, only to be followed by a series of deafening sounds as various people Apparated into the pub. Many witches and wizards stood in front of him, their wands out. Among them - with haunted eyes and a face full of pure hatred - Sirius Black.  
  
James stepped forward. "Ready to die?"  
  
Voldemort spun around to where James's body had been lying only minutes before. There lay the peaceful figure of a dark haired woman in eternal sleep.  
  
When the Dark Lord turned back around, Albus Dumbledore was in the pub as well. Before anyone could utter a spell to trap him, the Dark Lord was gone.  
  
Sirius dropped his wand, and ran forward towards the small and pale figure of Dorcas Meadowes - still beautiful, even in death. 


	26. Loyalty and Trust

Disclaimer: these are not my characters or my situations, and I don't give myself credit for them. Don't sue me thinking otherwise.  
  
AN: thanks for the reviews, even though the last chapter *was* a bit under- explained (thanks to Nikki for pointing this out). It's sort of cleared up in this chapter. I guess you can say Sirius is really affected - gosh I'm such a sucker for conflict.  
  
~~  
  
It was difficult for Sirius to finally accept Dorcas's death. In fact, he never really did. It only made him realize what he'd gotten himself into, and what she'd signed up for.  
  
He'd grown more reckless since then - with no real caution or regard for his own safety. He didn't talk as much, and it was hard to get a smile out of him (which was really difficult to believe).  
  
But a part of the old Sirius Black still remained, and was quickly reawakened. He dropped everything he'd planned when he found out about his best friend's big day.  
  
He rushed into the hospital room, completely out of breath. James grinned. "You're late."  
  
Sirius looked over James's shoulder. "It already happened?"  
  
"Yeah. Lily's asleep and so's the baby. But don't blame me. What took you so long?"  
  
Sirius cast his eyes downward. "I. . . er. . . took my motorbike."  
  
James laughed in disbelief. "Why didn't you just Apparate, you idiot?"  
  
Sirius shrugged sheepishly. "I was already on my bike, and I didn't have the time to take it all the way back to my place."  
  
James glanced out the door. "Did you send the owls?"  
  
Sirius nodded. "Rebecca couldn't come. I think a healer told her she'd be having hers in a few weeks. She can't really Apparate now."  
  
"And Remus?"  
  
Sirius shrugged, his expression growing cold. "He wanted to be with her, so. . ."  
  
"What about Frank and Alice? Are they coming?"  
  
At this, Sirius laughed out loud. James looked puzzled, but Sirius only shook his head. "They're in the room next door, mate."  
  
"Is that Sirius?" came a voice from behind James. He turned around and saw that Lily was already awake.  
  
"That wasn't a very good Sleeping Potion they gave you, was it?" he said.  
  
"Well, I didn't drink the whole thing," Lily replied quietly.  
  
"You have a name for the little guy yet?" Sirius asked, walking over to look at the baby.  
  
Lily nodded proudly. "Harry James Potter."  
  
Sirius frowned with immense disappointment. "You didn't name him after me?"  
  
Lily smiled weakly. Her smile faded when she noticed her husband in deep thought. "He needs a Godfather," James said, gazing at the wall blankly.  
  
"No he doesn't," Lily replied, a little uncertain at what James was getting at.  
  
James looked down at his son's small face, and nodded his head slowly. "He does." His eyes traveled up to his wife's worried face. "What if something happens to us?" he said.  
  
"Nothing's going to happen to us, James," Lily replied distanly, pulling a dark lock of hair from her son's face.  
  
"Lily," James replied softly.  
  
"Who, then?" she snapped, cutting him off from telling her the dark possibilities. She'd already considered what her fate could turn out being, and she wouldn't cry over it any more.  
  
"Well, Sirius is the only one here. And it's the natural choice - him being my best friend, and all." Sirius smiled slightly.  
  
"What kind of a. . ." Lily let her voice trail off, holding back her doubts of Sirius's responsibility - especially for a small child. She couldn't argue about this with Sirius in the room. "All right," she said finally.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The next week, Edgar Bones had news of a healthy baby girl named Susan, just in time for his sister's graduation from Hogwarts.  
  
As the morning of August 18th dawned bright and clear, Rebecca went into labor, giving birth to Jasmine Sybil Waters that evening. It didn't take long for Remus to hear the news.  
  
Rebecca gazed in awed wonder at her sleeping child. She didn't even acknowledge the fact that she was crying. "She won't have a father," Rebecca said quietly, almost to herself.  
  
"Sure she will," Remus said, and Rebecca brought her head up. He smiled.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James felt pretty content with how things seemed to be dying down. He hadn't heard anything about Voldemort seeking revenge or any of that - at least not yet. But he noticed that Dumbledore didn't seem to be feeling comfortable, or victorious for that matter. In fact he seemed as troubled as ever.  
  
James knew something was definitely going on when he found an owl addressed to him and Lily saying that it was imperative that they speak with him.  
  
Harry was far too young to leave in his Godfather's care. In fact, Lily felt it would never be a good time to leave her son in the hands of Sirius. So she had no choice but to bring Harry with them to the meeting.  
  
Neither of them had expected that they were the only ones Dumbledore wanted to speak with, but they found that that was the case when they stepped into the Hogwarts Headmaster's office.  
  
"Please sit down," Dumbledore said quietly. James and Lily quickly glanced at each other before taking a seat. Fortunately, Harry was still asleep.  
  
Dumbledore sat back, sighing heavily, and quickly glanced skywards, as if for courage to speak. "I have called you here to speak about matters concerning your son," he said, allowing a quick glance at Harry. His eyes smiled and twinkled blue, but his face remained grave.  
  
James and Lily only nodded for him to continue.  
  
"A prophecy has been made concerning the downfall of Voldemort, and I am beginning to think it is genuine," he began.  
  
James only blinked in confusion. "That's great, Dumbledore, but what does that have to do with our son?"  
  
Dumbledore sighed heavily, searching for the right words. "The Seer who gave the prophecy spoke of a baby being born as the seventh month dies."  
  
Lily frowned as she contemplated this. "That's the last day of July." James gave her a sidelong glance, but she didn't notice - her eyes were fixed on Dumbledore, who nodded calmly.  
  
"It was said that the witch or wizard who was born that day would be destined to defeat the Dark Lord."  
  
James's mouth dropped open slightly, but the next moment, he closed it quickly and smiled broadly. He even gave a short laugh. "You mean to say that Harry - this little boy sleeping here - is going to defeat Voldemort? Not me, not you, not anyone in the Order. . ." He laughed again, but Lily gave him a sharp look to silence him.  
  
"Not necessarily, Mr. Potter. You see, I've already spoken to the Longbottoms about this - "  
  
"The Longbottoms?" Lily interrupted with surprise. "What do Frank and Alice have to do with this?"  
  
"You fail to notice that their son was born the same day," Dumbledore replied.  
  
"What if it's all a joke?" James said, looking to Lily for agreement. "What makes you think it's really true? I mean, I'm sure hundreds of magical little brats were born on July 31st."  
  
"Ah, you see," Dumbledore began, holding up his hand. "There's more to the prophecy that bears witness to its authenticity. It says that that very person would be born to those who have thrice defied the Dark Lord." He paused to note their reactions. "I must admit, there aren't many who have faced Voldemort exactly three times and lived through it. What's even more curious is that two of them would have a child on the exact day as was foreseen."  
  
A draft of silence swept through the room as if it were a swift breeze. The couple seemed to be having difficulty speaking what was on their mind, as if they were grasping loose ends - unable to follow their own racing thoughts.  
  
"My own son," Lily said softly after a while. She looked down and her eyes softened.  
  
James, however, decided to take matters further. "So, if it really is Harry, or whoever, then we'd have to wait a while, right? I mean, a baby doesn't stand much of a chance against a full grown Dark wizard."  
  
Lily lost her loving smile as her head snapped up. "Are you meaning to say that - " she stopped, her eyes wide at the thought she'd stumbled upon. " - that Voldemort will live for years and years until our son is old enough to fight him? What will become of the world? What will become of us?"  
  
James shook his head, taking off his glasses to rub his eyes.  
  
"It's does no good to dwell on the future," Dumbledore sighed, noting Lily's panicked face. "While we must prepare for it."  
  
"And how will we do that?" James asked with a hint of exhaustion in his voice.  
  
"Protect Harry, as you would protect yourself."  
  
James nodded his head in understanding, bit couldn't help speaking in defense. "But Voldemort's not after Harry, is he? He's after me. He's always been after me. . ."  
  
Dumbledore closed his eyes, wishing he didn't have to be the bearer of such terrible news. "You see, this is why it is dangerous for Harry to be your son. But even above all that, I wouldn't be surprised if the Dark Lord cares nothing for your death in comparison of what he knows about Harry."  
  
"He knows?" Lily cried. "Voldemort knows?" She turned to James for comfort, but only found the reflection of her own horrified state.  
  
Dumbledore sighed once again, each sigh adding to his age and weariness. "He only knows the half of it, and so do you. It is better that way. Good day."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"She wasn't supposed to die," Sirius said with a bitter shake of his head. Remus gave him a sidelong glance. *Why was he bringing it up again after a month? Hadn't they suffered enough without hearing it all over again?*  
  
James only shook his head in agreement, trying to restrain the thoughts that had been tormenting him for the past month.  
  
Whether James was listening or not, Sirius didn't seem to care, and continued his contemplation. "The plan was for her to stay until someone from the Order showed up."  
  
James gripped his hair in frustration. *Couldn't he just shut up for a moment?* Remus seemed to notice James's pain, but didn't dare interrupt Sirius while he looked so broken and furious.  
  
"But no one seemed to show up, so she kept up the disguise until it was too late. . ." Sirius let his voice trail off while his teeth clenched together angrily.  
  
Remus rubbed his eyes, letting go of a little self-control. "Just shut it, Padfoot," he said quietly, but firmly.  
  
Sirius's head snapped in Remus's direction, and his eyes narrowed dangerously. "Why? Afraid to hear the truth?"  
  
James let out the breath he'd been holding in. "It's my fault, alright? Is that what you wanted to hear? I was late."  
  
Sirius sat back, a little stunned. "No, I wasn't blaming you at all, Prongs. I never even thought that."  
  
"Then what are you getting at?" Remus asked, quickly losing interest in the meaningless conversation.  
  
Sirius brought out his wand and set it down on the table next to him. "How'd Voldemort know where she was?" he asked, still piercing Remus with his glare.  
  
Remus shook his head nervously. "I don't know."  
  
Sirius started scratching his chin in thought, tipping his chair back on two legs. "There's a leak in our security, and she knew it. She knew it so well, that her plan depended on it. And you know what? It worked."  
  
Remus narrowed his eyes, and brought out his own wand, setting it down beside him. "Yes, I noticed."  
  
Sirius let a bitter grimace spread across his haunted face. "So, someone among us is in league with Voldemort."  
  
Remus rolled his eyes. "We all know that. Snape."  
  
Sirius shook his head, leaning forward. "But Snape stayed at Headquarters that whole day."  
  
James looked warily at both friends, a little nervous at what Sirius might be getting at.  
  
"Are you suggesting something?" Remus asked with a raise of his eyebrow.  
  
Sirius leaned back in his chair, letting it tip comfortably on two legs again. "All I'm saying is that it's curious that James lost his parents, Lily lost her parents, Rebecca lost her parents, but yours were never killed. They're purebloods, aren't they? Aren't you?" He paused to note Remus's reaction. "How did Voldemort know where James would be eating on Christmas day?"  
  
James's mouth dropped open in shock. "Stop it, Sirius."  
  
Remus only glared at the wizard sitting opposite of him, who continued. "The only people who knew were Rebecca, Lily, and us four. It wasn't James who told the Dark Lord, that's for sure. I'm pretty certain it wasn't me, and Rebecca and Lily would never do a thing like that. Peter worships us. But you? What excuse do you have?"  
  
Remus didn't answer.  
  
"Why is your family so safe?" Sirius asked finally, grabbing his wand.  
  
Remus stood, his characteristic solemnity forgotten. "You want to know what happened to them?" he said fiercely, grabbing his own wand. Sirius stood as well, as if accepting his challenge. He brought his wand before him, pointing it dangerously at Remus.  
  
"They left me," he replied simply and yet painfully.  
  
Sirius frowned, unsure whether to believe him, but didn't lower his wand.  
  
"They left me to find a cure for me," Remus continued bitterly. "They were sick of hiding me in my room and locking the door, no matter how much I tore the place apart. They knew I was suffering, so they left for research." He stopped, and lowered his own wand, not even caring to see if Sirius had lowered his.  
  
"I got a letter a year later saying they were killed. I was sixteen. I didn't tell anyone, except for now in my own defense against accusations of betrayal."  
  
Sirius stepped back, his face still twisted with anger, though a little softer than before.  
  
James sat wide-eyed at the scene before him, but said nothing.  
  
Remus broke the silence, gaining control once again. His voice got quieter, and his face grew calm again. "You're the only family I have, and I'm surprised that you'd suspect me after all the years you've known me."  
  
Sirius pocketed his wand, showing no sign of regret or embarrassment. In fact, he looked even angrier than before, though his voice was just as steady as Remus's. "Who is it, then? Who is it we shouldn't be trusting? Tell me, who has more credibility - someone who ran from their own family in order to do what's right, or a werewolf that keeps secrets?"  
  
Remus shrugged, shooting his own angry glare back at Sirius. "I don't know, but I must say you've changed, Sirius. And not for the better, I'm afraid." With that, he Dissaparated.  
  
Sirius stood there a few moments, still gripping his wand tightly. "And you haven't changed at all," he said resentfully, before leaving as well.  
  
James sat as a silent witness to an age old friendship falling apart at its final test of loyalty and trust - speechless.  
  
~~  
  
AN: Kudos to anyone who saw this coming. I doubt anyone did, but I think I left clues. Didn't I? Well, anyhoo, hope you liked it, and I hope things were cleared up and all. Happy 2004! 


	27. Conscience

Disclaimer: Not mine. Can't sue.  
  
This one's, well, let's just say I really need to start another comedy. This is a bit creepy. Hope you like it anyway!  
  
And, by popular demand, I present to you: Peter, the GIT!! Woohoo!  
  
~~  
  
Teaching Potions was hell.  
  
Snape couldn't stand the students, but what was worse was hearing the little brats talking about what a great Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher Professor Fenwick was.  
  
By the time August began to give way to September, and the next school year was about to start, Snape decided to take action.  
  
It was in the middle of a Death Eater meeting that the thought occurred to him.  
  
"I need you to do me a favor," Snape whispered to Peter, who narrowed his eyes scornfully. "Why should I?"  
  
Snape sighed in frustration. "Because I can tell Dumbledore about you any time I'd like."  
  
Peter frowned, but nodded his head finally. "What is it?"  
  
"Turn in Benjy Fenwick."  
  
Peter's eyes widened. "What side are you on?"  
  
Snape wasn't too sure himself. "My side. Why should you care, anyway? You're the traitor, aren't you?"  
  
"I suppose so," he admitted distantly, as if he'd never thought about it before. He didn't want to be, it was true, but somewhere inside of him, he knew this was the only place he'd be understood. No one here wanted to die fighting. Peter knew this wasn't the right thing to do, but still he found himself thinking - isn't survival the right thing?  
  
"Sure, I'll do it. It's not like it matters," he muttered under his breath before stepping forward.  
  
"My Lord," he began with mandatory respect. "There is a very active member in the Order of the Phoenix who is truly a threat to us," he said, making it up as he went along.  
  
Voldemort's eyebrows rose with mild interest. "Yes?"  
  
"Benjy Fenwick," he said, and quickly adding, "I didn't know of him before."  
  
After a while, the Dark Lord nodded his head, a wide smirk spreading across his face. "This sounds like the perfect initiation for our newest member."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Regulus Black had never used the Killing Curse on anyone or anything before, and he wasn't too confident it would work for him at all. He'd only graduated from Hogwarts a month ago, and they certainly hadn't taught him how to do it there.  
  
He walked along the dark street that led to where Benjy Fenwick was supposed to live. The house number was fifty-two, though Regulus was just passing thirty.  
  
Sure, he could Apparate and just get it over with, but he felt that he'd rather walk. Maybe he needed time to think, or maybe he was just doing whatever he could to delay his task.  
  
He stopped, hearing a rustle in the bushes. His wand whipped out and he spun around, but all that emerged was a small kitten. It must have been lost.  
  
Regulus glanced at his wand. This was his last chance to test himself before the real thing. All he wanted to do was give himself confidence in knowing he could actually wield the power of death - and yet, he felt himself hesitate as the kitten innocently cocked its head to the side in curiosity.  
  
"Avada Kedavra," he whispered hastily, closing his eyes as if it would soften the blow. When he opened them, the small creature lay limp and lifeless on the wet pavement. It didn't even have the chance to realize it's own mistake.  
  
He took a clumsy step back, horrified at what he'd done, and the fact that he could do it. He heard the pitiful cry echo in his head, and he ran forward along the street not even noticing how the house numbers continued to increase.  
  
Forty-one, forty-two, forty-three. . .  
  
He stopped when he saw that he was passing fifty-one. The next house loomed over him ominously even though it was the same height as all the rest of the houses along the street.  
  
*It's only a test,* he told himself. *Only a test.*  
  
And yet, if he felt sick and horrified over the murder of a small animal, how would a human life be any different? What if it was his mother in that house? Would he still do it? Would she be proud of her faithful son?  
  
His breathing sped up as his heart did as well. He shook his head. He couldn't do it. He could never do it. Abandoning all reason, he fled.  
  
He was killed the following day.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snape noticed with dismay that there were no tears of mourning the next day when he met with the Order. His doubts were confirmed when Benjy Fenwick himself Apparated, cheerful as ever.  
  
Snape swore silently, waiting for Dumbledore to start the meeting. He looked up when he noticed Dumbledore watching him intently. Almost the entire Order followed his gaze. He tried emptying his mind of all thought, but he knew it was too late when Dumbledore sat back and finally spoke.  
  
"Is there something you'd like to tell us, Severus?" he asked, his piercing blue eyes filled with a profound gravity. "Any developments?"  
  
But before Snape could say no, Dumbledore cut him off. "No planned attacks, were there?"  
  
Snape noted the danger of the situation, and had no choice but to spill it all. Or at least some of it. "Benjy Fenwick is in trouble," he said coldly, noting with disgust Dumbledore's nod of approval. "Though, no specifics were discussed, so that's the most warning I can give."  
  
Gideon and Fabian Prewett looked at each other grimly. "We'll be expecting it."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Voldemort nodded his head, signaling Antonin Dolohov to leave, who Apparated in eagerness to get the job done as Regulus had not.  
  
When he arrived in the dark house, he found it was seemingly empty. Silently, he crept around the corner into the hallway, being careful as to not let his footsteps echo. When he swiftly snapped his body around the corner into the next room, his mouth literally dropped. With a faint spasm of panic threatening to overtake him, he abruptly retreated.  
  
He Apparated back with a fearful glance toward his annoyed master.  
  
"That quick?" Voldemort snapped. Out of breath, Dolohov shook his head firmly. "No. The whole Order's there. I can't do it."  
  
Voldemort's crimson eyes narrowed briefly, but just as swiftly, seemed to come to life.  
  
"No," he said with obvious excitement. "No. If all they have to offer is strength in numbers, then I think it's time they were taught a lesson." He looked out across the sea of cloaks with satisfaction. "I'll have my inner circle fight them - but keep your masks on."  
  
At the Dark Lord's command, a few dozen Death Eaters stood forward, covering their faces. Peter was one of them.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"He left!" Emmaline Vance exclaimed, with a hint of hopeful triumph. "One look at us, and he left!"  
  
"No," Remus said, bring out his wand slowly. "He's going back for more people."  
  
Sirius let his anger build up, hoping it would help him fight. He glanced at Remus, not sure if he'd been right about him at all. But he held onto his pride, not even letting the thought of apology enter his mind.  
  
It was only him, Remus, Benjy, the Prewetts, James, Emmaline Vance, and Moody - though it must have seemed like more than that when the Death Eater had rounded the corner.  
  
A tense and uncomfortable silence followed as every member anticipated the impending battle. But when the dreaded cracks sounded and the eight of them saw how utterly outnumbered and consumed they were, their attitudes changed completely.  
  
Anticipation was no longer the right word, but fear didn't even begin to explain.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Lily waited with dread while Harry slept for a merciful while. Her fears and worries were beginning to drown out the sound of the torrential rain pounding like static, and violent winds thrashing at the rattling windows. In her own world of terror, Lily remained untouched by the rhythm of the cruel weather.  
  
She numbly glanced over at the figure of her sleeping child with longing. Sleep seemed like a consoling alternative to the world right now, though she couldn't bring herself to close her eyes for more than a few seconds.  
  
Clenching her teeth to overcome any sign of emotion, Lily got up to search the cupboards for the strongest Sleeping Potion she could find.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter tried standing back in the corner so he could easily slip from the battle without notice. He'd almost succeeded, until he noticed his friend, James, notice him out of the corner of his eye. Peter adjusted his mask before defending himself from the attack.  
  
With a second thought to his instincts of killing, Peter only stunned James, though it looked convincing enough.  
  
At the other end of the large room, past Gideon and Fabian taking on five Death Eaters at once, he noticed a few of his fellow cloaked wizards dragging Benjy Fenwick out of the back door. Peter found this as his opportunity to escape from the battle, and to escape from having to attack Remus or Sirius.  
  
He calmly followed the three Death Eaters outside into what looked like a greenhouse, thankful to be protected by the vicious storm outside.  
  
"Are you going to kill him or what?" one of the men asked impatiently.  
  
"No," said one of the others. "This chap's caused too much trouble for us to do him a favor like that. Crucio!"  
  
Peter flinched slightly, but found that the sickening screams and wails didn't horrify him as much as they used to. He merely remained passive and listened as the victim's cries were swallowed in the deafening noise of the storm beyond the glass walls.  
  
In the man's flailing and attempts to gain control over his own agony, his arm flew out, knocking the Death Eater's wand from his hand.  
  
Peter watched in awe as the others scrambled around for their own wands, almost forgetting that he was actually standing there with them. He heard one of the wizards speak harshly in his direction, but they didn't have his attention until he heard his name - or what had become of his name.  
  
"Wormtail!"  
  
Peter's head snapped up, and he saw that the others were holding Benjy Fenwick - who was quickly regaining strength - down with their weight. "Your knife," the Death Eater nearest to him said, or commanded, rather.  
  
On impulse, Peter reached into his pocket. He glanced at the knife briefly, remembering his own guilt about accepting a gift from Sirius. *Well,* he thought. *I might as well put it to use.*  
  
Quickly, he thrust it into the Death Eater's hand, turning his back to the scene after catching a glimpse of the victim's face, twisted with terror and pleading.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was the third time Rebecca had woken that night. Or at least, it was the third time she could remember. She'd hoped the visions and feelings would have stopped when Jamie had been born, but she found it only continued to collaborate until it was nearly unbearable.  
  
It was almost as if she were subconsciously counting down to something. . . something very near.  
  
The scream had sounded familiar - but they always did. She concluded that she could come to no conclusion, so she sighed, pulled back the covers, and got up to find something to eat - or anything to keep her waking mind busy.  
  
She silently crept by the cradle where Jamie slept, but before she could take another step, the baby let out a cry almost instantly. Rebecca smiled to herself. Already, her daughter could sense people - or at least just her mother.  
  
She bent over, stretching out her arms to pick her up. Her arms folded over to cradle her unhappy child, and the crying stopped almost immediately.  
  
She noticed with delight that she hadn't inherited any physical traits that in any way resembled the Malfoys. Jamie's hair was still thin and whispy, but clearly an almond brown like Rebecca's. The eyes would remain gray for a few more months, but she guessed they'd be like hers as well. Or, at least, she hoped so.  
  
She'd heard that Lucius had finally gotten the son he wanted, through his wife, Narcissa. This was both a relief and an insignificance to her, but she couldn't help hoping this meant Lucius wouldn't go after Jamie. At least, not while the world seemed so hectic.  
  
She smiled, noting that Jamie was once again asleep. She put her back carefully, and tucked the blanket close to Jamie's chin. Standing back, she rubbed her eyes with a weary sigh.  
  
She wasn't going to get any sleep tonight.  
  
~~  
  
Despite the fact that this one was a bit creepy, I think you're gonna like the next chapter!! *squeals* Just let me write it, first. . . 


	28. Last Chances

AN: I have never eaten rutabaga, nor do I want to.  
  
Valarauko: You're back! Yay! Wow, that must have been a LOTTA reading, huh? Thanks for the compliment, though I'm not sure it's true. (haha)  
  
Danae: Yay! Thankees to you! *frowns* Fine then, TAKE HIM!! *sobs uncontrollably*  
  
This Parrot has ceased to be: Awesome name by the way. OMG! Your favorite paragraph was *my* favorite paragraph. That's just creepy. Wow, we've got a deepthinking review here. I just thought a storm would be a nice mood to give the feeling that something's changed and gone dreadfully wrong. Can I borrow your brain for school or something?  
  
Neoma: Thanks! Really good? I sure hope so. . .  
  
Nixiy: Yes, Peter will be ever-so-increasingly evil. And Snape will grow a backbone. Haha.  
  
Nikki: Please note this is 16 years before that. He's on his way, so be patient for the evilness to shine through. (haha) I think this chapter should help. And yes, I have been making Snape a little too corrupt. Thanks for your advice, you have no ideahow much it helps!! Oh, and sorry for killing Dorcas and the Prewetts. It sorta had to happen, but I'm still sorry.  
  
All4DaEstrada: Yay for Emmy! *hugs Emmy* Well, I'm glad you like it, despite the impending tragedy later on. I'm trying to find an optimistic note to leave it on, but what can I say? I'm a sucker for conflict.  
  
~~  
  
Rebecca woke to a tentative knock on her door. Slightly annoyed by the fact that her small chance of sleep had just perished, she slowly got up - a little disoriented by her exhaustion.  
  
She opened the door roughly with an unenthusiastic hello, but her sleepy eyes snapped wide open when she found herself face to face with the person who'd made her night so difficult.  
  
Despite his cold features, a small smile fluttered across Remus's face. "Did I wake you?"  
  
Rebecca shook her head numbly, stepping back to let him inside.  
  
They stood still for a moment, searching each other's faces. Rebecca was confused and a little lost, but then again, perhaps it was because she hadn't eaten in a while. Nevertheless, she had a reason to be confused. After all, she had no clue what Remus wanted.  
  
So why did he look just as lost and confused?  
  
"You okay?" he asked, still not moving to sit down or make himself more comfortable.  
  
"Yeah," came Rebecca's faint reply.  
  
"And Jamie?"  
  
Rebecca glanced behind her. "She's finally asleep," she said, her eyes drooping, and her body threatening to lose consciousness, despite the fact that she was standing.  
  
Remus's face softened as something seemed to dawn on him. "Have you had any sleep?" he asked with quiet concern.  
  
Rebecca let her shoulders drop, ready to confess that she hadn't. But instead, she decided to turn the tables. She'd had enough of talking about herself.  
  
"Have you?" she asked him with just as much concern.  
  
With the faintest trace of a warm smile, Remus shook his head. "I'm fine," he said reassuringly.  
  
"You could have died," she blurted, as if the statement had been pushing its way out until she'd finally opened her mouth to let it. "You're not fine."  
  
Whatever happiness was present in his face seemed to flee at her words, but a certain determined hope remained in his eyes. "Yes," he confessed. "I could have."  
  
Rebecca felt a wave of self-hatred for driving away his only happiness wash over her. She bit her lip.  
  
"I can't tell you nobody tried to kill me," he continued, to Rebecca's surprise. "Still, I managed to dodge the curses and make my way out alive. . . but for what? So I could come over and visit you the next day?" He stopped, gazing at the carpet as if it held the answers for him.  
  
Rebecca merely stood in a speechless stupor, still trying to digest his words.  
  
"One slip and I'd be dead," he said, shaking his head slowly. After a few eternally prolonged moments, he brought his head up to meet Rebecca's intent gaze. The way he was acting was really beginning to scare her, but she said nothing. "And that's why I came."  
  
Rebecca frowned with bewilderment. "You came because you almost died?" What was there to say? He wasn't making any sense.  
  
He shook his head, walking forward to stand in front of her. "I came because I've only just realized I don't have all the time in the world as I used to."  
  
Rebecca felt a surge of different emotions enter her body in a chaotic tidal wave, causing her eyes to sting. It was hard to keep track of everything with all the sympathy, fear, pity, misery, and, of all things, love.  
  
"I can't wait for things to happen themselves when I seem to be losing opportunities left and right. . ." His voice trailed off and Rebecca began to feel the warmth of his body - hearing his heart beating almost as fast as hers. He glanced at her lips quickly before closing the distance between them.  
  
At that sudden blissful instant, a loud wail sounded somewhere behind her, declaring that her daughter was wide awake, for whatever reasons. Closing her eyes in despair, Rebecca stepped back from his embrace.  
  
She turned her back to him reluctantly, but before she could leave to tend to her crying baby, an arm caught hers, turning her around.  
  
"Marry me?"  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter sat silently, intently watching the other members of the Order of the Phoenix, yet feeling worlds away from them.  
  
Tides of guilt had weathered away at his heart for so long, he could feel it numbing. He looked around the room at people he'd known for a little while, and others he'd known most of his life. But now it was different since he'd already crossed the point of no return. He didn't feel the sympathy they felt for the Bones family - after all, it was him who had killed them, in a way.  
  
He couldn't be a friend and an enemy at once, he'd concluded - it was too emotionally overwhelming. Eventually, he would bring everyone in this room to their deaths, and it was better to accept it sooner than later. By now, he'd learned to hate love.  
  
Peter was one of the select few who didn't shed tears that day for the loss of Edgar Bones and his wife. Rather, he smiled inwardly as he noticed how much less crowded the room was compared to a year ago.  
  
The Order was failing, and Peter began to feel pride for being a part of that victory.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Sirius?" Lily called when she heard the familiar crack that indicated Apparation. Her call was answered by the sound of cupboards opening and closing. She entered the kitchen to see it was exactly who she'd thought.  
  
"Why do you insist on eating here everyday?" she asked with obvious frustration and amusement.  
  
"Because I can't cook," he answered as if it should have been obvious. "What's for lunch?"  
  
James walked in with one bottle of baby food in each hand. "Squashed peas, or creamed rutabaga?"  
  
Lily vanquished both bottles with her wand, and began raiding the cupboards muttering, "There's got to be something more appetizing than that."  
  
"Harry's calling you," Sirius said when he heard a baby starting to cry.  
  
"You'd think his Godfather might help out every once in a while," she muttered sarcastically as she left the kitchen. Sirius grinned as he watched her leave.  
  
"Did Remus tell you what he did yesterday?" James asked in a solemn tone, shaking his head.  
  
"What'd he do?" Sirius replied with a drastic change in attitude - cold and seemingly uninterested.  
  
"He proposed to Rebecca," James said with a bitter laugh.  
  
"Oh really?" Sirius replied offhandedly. "And?"  
  
James frowned enormously. "She said no."  
  
Sirius burst out with a sudden barking laugh. "I don't blame the poor girl."  
  
With a shocked raise of his eyebrows, James replied, "Excuse me?"  
  
Sirius waved his hand as if it were of no importance. "He always keeps to himself - kind of hard to trust the guy, isn't it?"  
  
"Blimey," James said, nearly disgusted. "You still on about him?" To this, Sirius nodded his head emphatically. James paused, his mind working furiously to figure out what might have started this in Sirius - someone who he'd come to understand so well.  
  
"Well if you're about to suspect Remus, it's a little hard to overlook Peter," James began. "He's never around, and when he is he's a bit jittery."  
  
Sirius rolled his eyes in frustration. "Have a little faith in the guy. He saved your life, after all, didn't he?"  
  
"And you think Moony wouldn't do the same?" James replied with an inquisitive raise of his eyebrow. He kept his voice calm, since he didn't feel comfortable yelling at Sirius. It was hard to believe they never fought, at least not out loud, but it was true.  
  
Sirius opened his mouth as if to counter this question, but he stopped when waves of daunting memories flooded into his mind. His eyes lost their competitive fire, and an unnaturally haunting darkness crept across his face. "Have you already forgotten the countless times he's tried to kill us?"  
  
James took a horrified step back. "That wasn't him, Sirius. That was. . . he isn't himself when that happens."  
  
Sirius scowled. He couldn't help but feel that maybe James was right, but he wouldn't admit it. The fire inside of him had flared enormously, and by now, it was nearly impossible to put out. Hatred had once again gotten a hold of him.  
  
"How are we supposed to know that?" he answered testily. "Wouldn't that be the perfect excuse if someone had stopped him from murder? Don't you remember how obsessive with perfection he was at school? He's not right in the head, James."  
  
James just shook his head in disbelief. He thought war would bring out the best in people - courage, love, loyalty, and bravery. Why did suspicion and hate have to be put into the equation?  
  
"You always told me you'd die for your friends, mate," James said quietly. "What will you die for now?" 


	29. Turning Around

Nixiy: Hmmmm. Believe it or not, I don't even like writing romance, so I'm not sure I'll actually write about the wedding. Maybe I'll just summarize it. Besides, she said no. *points and laughs at Remus*  
  
awkward: thank you! I actually hate the first one. I dunno why. Nevertheless, I don't have the heart to bury it in my backyard. And it kind of contributes to this story. Thanks for reviewing, and I hope you like the chapter.  
  
Nikki: *cough cough* haven't even kissed yet? Don't know each other well? They've known each other all through school, he started showing feelings (aww) in seventh year, they got 'together' together when she told him she was pregnant (which was about 8 months ago). Tada? I don't write fluff, in fact I don't even like writing romance, so I didn't put kisses in every scene just for the heck of it. I thought it would get repetitive and boring. Just assume they've kissed say. . . 317 times? (haha) Sorry, I had way too much sugar and I'm writing too much, huh? Best chapter yet?! Wow! Thanks, girl!  
  
This Parrot has ceased to be: Go Monty Python! I can't believe it took me that long to get that.  
  
~~  
  
~~  
  
It was one of those days – Peter could tell by the insane gleam in his master's eyes. It was a day of cruel inspiration and murderous intentions. The Dark Lord had formed a plan.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Dumbledore was at headquarters closely examining the Daily Prophet for any suspicious developments, when his speculation was interrupted by the loud hooting of an impatient owl – itching to be relieved of its burden.  
  
Dumbledore quickly detached the note from the owl's leg, unaware of the fuss it made as it took off due to the rapt attention he was giving the note, which read;  
  
I will be brief and anonymous in case this owl is intercepted. (Dumbledore noticed a few scribbled attempts to write a 'V') The Dark Lord has a plan he will carry out today. He did not mention any specifics, but he did say something about an invisibility cloak. He in fact spoke in length about the Potter boy. Be wary.  
  
Dumbledore nodded his head gravely as he held the note over the flame of the candle in front of him – setting fire to the evidence. Even if the owl was perfectly safe in delivering the letter, there was no need to say who it was from. Severus Snape must have figured that as well when he'd written it.  
  
The safest thing was to call a meeting immediately, so he could keep an eye on all of the proceedings. It there would be an attack on any of the members of the Order, the assassin would only find themselves searching an empty house.  
  
Yes. It would be safer to have everyone gathered here, he concluded. Or so he'd thought.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Dumbledore carried out his plan as he'd intended. Lily came with James this time, carrying Harry in her arms, and the Longbottoms brought their son as well. All the members of the Order had either brought their infant children who were too small to leave alone, or had left their families with other friends while they gathered here at headquarters.  
  
A rushing thought entered Remus Lupin's mind – he shouldn't let Rebecca and Jamie be alone. But at the painful thought of Rebecca, a ringing began to sound in his ears, pulsating from the back of his neck and echoing throughout his head.  
  
He hadn't had such a pounding headache since N.E.W.T.s – except now his whole body seemed to be in similar agony.   
  
He didn't even notice Dumbledore was speaking to them at all – he couldn't hear any voices over the stress and misery. But slowly and ever so gradually, a sound came to him that had never passed his ears, but seemed to be coming from the depths of his own mind.  
  
Someone whispered softly, and the painful thoughts were hushed in order to listen to the small, yet powerful voice.  
  
James made a familiar and timeless gesture of ruffling his hair – even if he was out of school and had no one to impress. It had become a habit, and a sign of anxiety. He grasped Lily's hand for comfort, knowing his son was a primary target for whatever was intended to come to pass.   
  
Sirius tipped his chair on two legs as he watched the dwindled group with narrowed eyes that darted back and forth, pausing occasionally on Remus. After a few silent minutes, however, he began to see what he'd been suspecting all along begin to unfurl.  
  
Slowly and deliberately, Remus brought out his wand. Just as gradually, he stood from his chair and turned to face James and Lily. But the aim of his wand fell upon Harry, who woke from his slumber at his mother's flinch, but didn't utter a cry.  
  
Dumbledore spoke calmly, but with hidden tones of power and command. "Remus, put your wand down."  
  
But the wizard in question only shook his head, a hateful scowl that seemed to be foreign to his kind face showing clearly now as he set out to kill Harry Potter.  
  
Sirius shot up from his chair, his wand out in an instant, but Dumbledore got to him first. Remus stood stock still, rooted to the spot as Dumbledore whispered spells and charms, his eyes darting back and forth to all the people around the room.  
  
"I knew it," Sirius said triumphantly and with a small (and well disguised) hint of pain at the betrayal. "I knew it all along."   
  
Neville Longbottom gave out a shrill cry of discontent.  
  
Remus would have fought back in his defense, shaken his head, done something. . . except that Dumbledore's drawn wand restrained him from any further movement.  
  
Lily's face was horrified, only mirroring the state of shock everyone seemed to be sharing – excluding Remus and Sirius. James stood, getting his surprise and mild disgust under control. Shock soon gave way to disbelief. He grew suspicious – not of Remus, but of the overall situation.  
  
On account of sheer luck, or perhaps desperate revelation, he sent a spurt of crimson and gold sparks towards the farthest corner of the wall. An odd and muffled sound emitted from the spot.  
  
Dumbledore spun around as he heard shuffling and frantic footsteps, and the spell abruptly let go of its hold on Remus.   
  
Closing his eyes, Dumbledore followed the sound, aiming where he thought the source may have been running to.  
  
The spell he whispered indeed hit something, and whatever it was must have fallen to the floor. He grasped at the air, and when his hand came back up, it was holding a silvery luminescent fabric – an invisibility cloak.  
  
Uncovered was a stunned man in hooded black robes and the mask of a Death Eater. His wand was drawn and lay clutched in his limp hand.  
  
Sirius was torn between relief and stubborn contempt. He spun back on Remus, who gave him a pleading look. Despite the tension, James could clearly conclude and believe that Remus had acted only under the influence of a powerful Imperius Curse.  
  
The room was deadly silent, but the looks that were shared were clear enough as if they'd been sung.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was amazing and utterly horrible how tension and pressure had made Rebecca say the stupidest thing she'd ever said in her whole life. She had already begun to feel the regret of denying bliss swelling in her the moment she'd said it.  
  
But Remus had left quickly – too quickly for her to see the error of her ways.  
  
She didn't have the nerve to ask him over, and lacked the security to see him herself. Only Jamie's young cries were of consolance to her heart's muffled screams.  
  
In her agony and misery, strange and unwelcome visions flooded into her mind's eye. Though dark and frightening, she knew they were, indeed, the future. In those late hours of the night and early hours of the morning, while Jamie slept peacefully, Rebecca gained an ominous knowledge of what was to come.  
  
At fleeting images of her own death, Rebecca remembered Remus's words to her. As she gazed numbly at her own dead body, she realized that he was right – she no longer had all the time in the world.  
  
Her days were numbered, and she found she'd rather spend them by Remus Lupin's side than painfully alone.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: "…wouldn't Sirius have told you they'd changed the plan?"  
  
"Not if he thought I was the spy, Peter," said Lupin. "I assume that's why you didn't tell me?" he said casually over Pettigrew's head.  
  
"Forgive me, Remus," said Black.  
  
~~~ PoA pg 373 (just to show that the conflict during the war between Remus and Sirius wasn't my idea. It was the great and all-powerful JKR's doing.)  
  
By the way, reading that chapter of PoA is so much better than the first time. Or second, or third. Go read it! 


	30. So Be It

Nikki: Um.... very long. Sorry. I didn't exactly PLAN it like that, but that's how it's turning out.  
  
This Parrot has ceased to be: Yes, Sirius will see the error of his ways, but he has to be arrested first! haha. Yeah, it was a little short. I'm not sure but this one may be even shorter. Sorry.  
  
Nixiy: I think Dumbledore is supposed to be like that. I don't think he'd voice out loud everything he was thinking, and trust me, he thinks a lot. It's hard to write about him, but hey, it sorta worked, didn't it?  
  
Disclaimer: I no own. You hear me?  
  
AN: I like Peter in this chapter. He's more Peter-ish - you know, the one Rowling writes about. Okay, I know I've been slower with updates, but I'm officially banned from the internet, and here I am on the school computer writing this and Reviewer notes and there's five minutes until first period and the librarian is eying me like a hawk. So don't complain. I also like the connection between Sirius and Peter. Obviously, this will only lead to conflict, and we all know I just LURVE conflict. *rolls eyes at herself* 'So be it' is such a funny phrase, don't you think? I certainly hope you have nothing against it because I think I used it like three times. Haha.  
  
Whoever started these author's notes must be out of their mind.  
  
~~  
  
Mustering her courage and confident posture, Rebecca came to an inevitable conclusion. After everything she'd seen, death didn't scare her anymore. She drew in a quick, steadying breath. No, death didn't scare her at all anymore. . .   
  
She told herself the same thing over and over until she actually found herself believing it. Death did not scare her. This was what she had to do, and if she lived for twenty years or only twenty days, then so be it.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Wearily and sullenly, Remus once again brought out his lunar charts. He studied them for a moment, but found there was no need - the window beside him said enough about the moon. About three more days and it would be full.  
  
He heard a distant sound from within the house, but he ignored it.  
  
Despite the fact that he no longer needed them, he left the charts out - gazing numbly as if he could see through the parchment. He only found that the vivid illustrations of the moon were impenetrable and real.  
  
He clenched his fists, and shut his eyes tightly to prevent himself from dwelling on his pain.  
  
He'd never forget the flicker of disgust in Rebecca's face when she'd found out so long ago. Perhaps he'd only imagined it, but right now it didn't seem to matter as he began drowning himself in his own self-pity. He found it was easier to feel sorry for himself than look on the bright side of things. At a time like this, a small tap on the shoulder was enough for him to jump from his chair in a spasm of panic.  
  
And just that thing happened.  
  
Remus spun around, his surprise only rising to it's peek when he saw it was Rebecca. Hesitating only briefly, she threw herself forwards - grasping his face in her hands and kissing him deeply.  
  
When she let go, Remus stepped back ineptly - feeling slightly intoxicated. It was hard to think clearly when he'd gone from one extreme to the complete opposite. Only moments before, he'd been contemplating how useless his life was, and in an instant it seemed to all come back to him.  
  
The headache intensified. "You?" he mumbled, rubbing his forehead.  
  
She nodded her head, not one bit sheepish - but instead, immensely grave. Smugness hadn't stolen her yet.  
  
"You - how'd you - where's Jamie?"  
  
Rebecca nodded behind her towards the door. "Sleeping in the other room."  
  
A part of him was completely lost in the conversation, but another part was still holding onto that kiss, and didn't want to talk at all. "I don't have a crib for her, though," he mumbled, looking over her shoulder as if to check.  
  
"You do now," she replied, the amusement and smugness finally grabbing a hold of her. Remus gave her a bewildered look when he found that she was smiling.  
  
"I brought all my things with me, hope you don't mind."  
  
"Do I? I mean, I don't." He paused. "Why?"  
  
Rebecca smiled her playful smile once again. "I figured if I married you, that implied we'd be living together, am I right?"  
  
His first instinct was to kiss her, but he didn't. He didn't even react at all for a few seconds. Instead, his pain's echo began returning to him. She'd cause him so much pain. So much pain.  
  
"Why didn't you just say so in the first place?" he said harshly, only realizing he'd snapped when the words were already out.  
  
Her face fell, and her eyes locked with his in pleading. "I'm so sorry," was all she said.  
  
He paused for a moment, seeing that she'd automatically known what he meant by it.  
  
Contempt wasn't a common thing for him, but it certainly wasn't unfamiliar. Nevertheless, it faded away into oblivion at the look on her face. She'd been feeling the same things, he could tell.  
  
Already, he could feel his spirits lifting. "I need to tell you that I don't cook," he said quickly. "I hope that isn't a problem."  
  
Rebecca shook her head. A smile had never come easier.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James and Lily couldn't contain their excitement at the news. Sirius, however, looked scornful - despite the countless times he'd tried to play cupid when they were at school.  
  
Deep down he knew he was happy for them, and that's what made it all the more sickening. Sirius had always thought himself equal with Remus.   
  
They'd always done well in the same classes, they'd always helped out in the same pranks, and they'd both found a girl they'd cared about at one point or another.  
  
However, Remus never felt he had to impress anyone, so he didn't. Even if he did just as well as Sirius, the teachers liked him better. Even if he came up with plans for some practical joke, it was always him who escaped from trouble.  
  
And when Sirius had finally found someone who seemed to be more than all the other girls he'd been with, she goes and dies to save everyone while Remus lives happily ever after.  
  
It was the same case with James, but that was something completely different. James was the victim - he'd always been the victim - it'd been that way ever since his father had become such a well-known Auror. After all he'd been through, he deserved to have a happy life. And Sirius felt it was his purpose to make sure nothing happened to ruin that - since he couldn't enjoy the same life.  
  
The wedding was in a month, they said. Sirius promised himself that he'd find some place better to be as an excuse for not showing up.  
  
Out of the corner of his eye, Sirius spotted Peter, sitting in the corner. He looked just as bored and aloof as Sirius felt. He gave him a small smile of understanding when he caught a hint of jealousy in Peter's eyes. He didn't smile back.  
  
At least, not at first. Peter felt he'd rather be anywhere else than here right now. He also knew it was completely his choice to leave, and that no one would think it strange. He narrowed his eyes in thought. Just to be sure, he ought to pull it off better than before.  
  
He no longer felt uncomfortable with what he was doing - whether it was right or wrong, it didn't matter to him anymore. He sat up straighter in his chair, deciding it was about time he acted like it.  
  
After all, he'd need to gain enough trust for them to share everything without a doubt of his intentions. He turned his head and gave Sirius   
  
Black a convincing smile.  
  
He stood, and to his surprise, everyone followed suit after him. With renewed confidence in what he was doing, or pretending to do, he lifted his glass in a toast.  
  
"To unwavering friendship," Peter said, and if anyone had known better, they would have seen his smile for what it was - the first feelings of superiority.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snape stood as still as he could. He was afraid to move - if he did, he might catch his master's eye. However, if he looked too stiff, it would be suspicious.  
  
He tried to clear his mind so no one would see or hear what he was thinking, but the jumbled thoughts kept flooding in, as if his brain was turning to itself for advice as to making sense of what he'd just done.  
  
He wanted Benjy Fenwick dead, and yet he was forced to reveal the plans for that very thing to be carried out. Why, then, did he continue to help the Order?  
  
Why did he insist on saving James Potter's son?  
  
Granted, it was said that this very boy was to defeat the wizard pacing irritably before him. It was difficult to believe, but deep down, Snape was hoping it was true.  
  
Somehow he felt himself becoming more loyal to Dumbledore than to. . . his master. After all, Albus Dumbledore had saved him, a Death Eater, even after he'd lied blatantly. Gratefulness for that compassion was becoming stronger than his fear of the Dark Lord.  
  
Content that he was beginning to understand his own actions, Snape tried to relax and wipe his emotions clean from his mind just in time for Voldemort to turn around and begin the meeting.  
  
Snape joined with everyone else in the mandatory bow of respect to their master. He smirked, for he knew better - none of them had respect, only fear for their wasted lives.  
  
When Voldemort had turned his back to address the other half of Death Eaters, a residual thought flew back to him. Perhaps he'd gotten his reward, he thought bitterly. After all, in Professor Fenwick's absence, Dumbledore had given Snape charge over both Potions and Defense Against the Dark Arts for the rest of the year.   
  
"Mr. Wormtail tells us the Order was assembled at headquarters the day the attack was planned, is this right?"  
  
Peter nodded proudly.  
  
"And it was also him who notified Mr. Finst of this, so he would be able to get to Harry Potter," Voldemort continued. Peter nodded once again, a smug smile creeping across his round face.   
  
The Dark Lord stopped his casual pacing, and turned slowly and imperiously towards Peter. "And yet, once again my plan has failed to follow through."  
  
Peter's smile faded into a frightened look of humility, and he lowered his head in meekness. Snape held no sympathy for him. Peter had backed himself into a corner, blocked his only escape, and stood proudly as if he'd done the smart thing. Out of all the hundreds of followers Voldemort had, Snape was the only one who could see this.  
  
"No matter," said Voldemort, shaking off his anger. "Now that we know how bad security is at Headquarters, we can follow through on destroying the place. Even better, do it during a meeting. . . His cold voice trailed off in thought.  
  
Peter brought up his head, a look of anticipated horror upon his face. "My Lord?" he ventured. "They've placed an Anti-Apparating jinx on the place on top of the Fidelius charm. The only way now is walking in, and you'd need Dumbledore to give you personal consent just to enter." He stopped abruptly, feeling he'd spoken out of turn. He collapsed to the ground.  
  
Voldemort's unnaturally pallid face reddened with anger, ready to take it out on the pitiful creature groveling with mercy before him. He whispered the Cruciatus Curse while the Death Eaters took pleasure in watching the unjust punishment.  
  
But the Dark Lord pocketed his wand quicker than usual, only because he wanted Peter to be in a well enough condition to provide more information.  
  
"The Potters, then. Where have they moved?"  
  
"They haven't," Peter gasped. "They live in the same place as always." He hadn't meant to sound as if he were trying to make him look stupid, but he should have known that's how his master would have taken it.  
  
Peter cried out in terror when his master brought his wand out again. Snape shook his head as he watched the merciless torture passively.  
  
If this is how the man had chosen to live, then so be it.  
  
~~  
  
AN: might not post again for a while. I'll try, but I'm running out of excuses for using the school computers. Review! 


	31. The Unwelcome Warning

AN: one HUGE IMPORTANT thing. You remember chapter 4 i think it was, where it was Christmas and Mr. and Mrs. Potter were murdered? Well, I just realized that I need to change something. I repeatedly said the house was on Godric's Hollow, but it's not. Okay. I think I might even rewrite it because I'm that obsessive. The Godric's Hollow home won't show up for a couple chapters.   
  
So, if you get an email from ff.net saying I changed something, that's all it is.  
  
Ok, then. Read on.  
  
~~  
  
It is urgent that I speak with you and Lily. Leave your house immediately, and bring Harry. I will be waiting in the Three Broomsticks in Hogsmeade. It's safer than Diagon Alley, and with all it's comings and goings, we won't be overheard. Come as soon as possible, I'll be there.  
  
Remus Lupin  
  
James set down the letter slowly. He turned his head when he heard the owl take off. Frowning in thought, he noticed it was a different owl than the one Remus usually used.  
  
He wasn't sure if he should go immediately as the letter had said. After all, it was nearly midnight – there wouldn't be anyone out in Hogsmeade. On the other hand, that could have been exactly what Remus had been counting on.  
  
"Lily?" James called out.  
  
In a matter of moments, she was walking into the room, her face bright and smiling. Her smile faltered only slightly when she noticed her husband's thoughtful expression. "What is it?" she asked, noticing the letter he was holding.  
  
"Remus wants us to meet him," he said finally, standing up. "Get Harry."  
  
Lily blinked, and smiled again. "I'm sure Sirius would be happy to watch – "  
  
"No," James said, cutting her off. "No, bring him. Remus wants us to." He smiled warmly so she wouldn't pick up the urgency in his voice.  
  
Slowly, she nodded, and left the room.  
  
He gave the room one last look before leaving after her.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Just as James had expected, Hogsmeade was empty. Only a few lights flickered in the village's homes in the distance. He proceeded down the street quietly, with Lily by his side, until he approached the entrance to the Three Broomsticks.  
  
He entered cautiously, only to find Severus Snape sitting at one of the tables, sipping some unidentifiable drink.  
  
"Er, hello Severus," Lily said, a little uncertain of her greeting. Snape nodded in acknowledgement.  
  
"Have you seen Remus – I mean – Lupin?" James asked, trying his best to make his voice friendly as he stood before someone who would have been his worst enemy.  
  
Snape gave an odd smile. "Nope. Not looking for him are you?"  
  
"Why?" James asked coldly, not very eager to engage in a conversation.  
  
Snape shrugged indifferently, gazing into his empty glass. "Only because he won't be coming."  
  
"What'd you do with him?" James snapped, brandishing his wand threateningly.  
  
Snape glanced calmly at James, then to his wand, and back to his empty glass. "Nothing. He doesn't know you're here. I sent the letter."  
  
James stepped in front of Lily and Harry. "What do you want from us?"  
  
Snape set his glass down, and turned his gaze skywards as if he were bored with the situation. "I don't want anything from you," he said. "Or your family for that matter."  
  
"Then why'd you call us here?" Lily asked, just as coldly as James, only lacking the hostility.  
  
Snape let his eyes travel to hers, swallowing hard. He was unsure whether he wanted to do this, but it was too late to back out. It was against everything he'd promised himself for years and years – forsaking his accumulated hatred and revenge. Instead, he'd followed his twinge of compassion – that awful compassion – and now, he thought dryly, he was just like them, and they would live another worthless day only to spend it in panic about tomorrow. Shaking his head, he stood up. "Go home and you'll see."  
  
James felt his mouth drop open. "What's that supposed to mean?" he demanded, but before he could ask any more questions, Snape had Disapparated.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James sprinted through his own empty house, only to see that everything was just as he'd left it. He stopped in the hallway, and bent over with his hands on his knees, breathing hard and trying to catch his breath. He could see there was nothing wrong with the house, but still, he was nervous from Snape's words. It was either a warning or a threat, but either way, he was uncomfortable.   
  
Nevertheless, he Apparated quickly back to where he'd left Lily and Harry, aware that it hadn't been wise to leave them there alone. But what was he supposed to do? Bring them back to the house without checking it first?  
  
"It's fine," he said, gasping for air, adding hastily, "I think."  
  
It was enough for Lily, who Apparated back, with James quickly following suit.  
  
Upon returning, Lily found the house was just as James had said it was. Satisfied, she tiptoed upstairs with Harry in her arms. She entered his room, and walked over to the cradle that sat in the center of the room. Slowly, she laid her sleeping baby into the layers of quilts and blankets.  
  
She smiled warmly, though she shivered when a fresh blast of cold air swept into the room through the open window. She turned around to where the window was, but stopped in her tracks when she noticed a glow filtering through the white curtains.  
  
"James?" she yelled, failing to hide her alarm. Before she could realize her mistake, Harry woke, crying loudly at the commotion of his father running into the room.  
  
"What is it?" James said with worry clearly written on his face.  
  
Lily nodded towards the curtained window, as she picked up Harry to calm him.   
  
James ran to the window, and threw open the glowing curtains, letting the sky's green glow pour out into the room. Harry's frightened cries grew louder as his father's face blanched a pure white.  
  
He ran from the room, and tore down the stairs, his heart pumping a terrified rhythm in his chest. Once he reached the street, he turned around, and began to back away slowly. His gaze traveled upwards, above the windows, past the roof to the terrible sight that was suspended over his home.  
  
With a sickening green glow about it, the Dark Mark stared back at him – a sign of a coming storm.   
  
He exhaled shakily through gritted teeth with the unwavering knowledge that this would never be over.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The Order had swept through the house checking for jinxes and leftover curses. Harry was crying louder than ever, and Lily was doing what she could to comfort him. James was a complete mess, unsure whether to help out or stand by his family's side.  
  
Another crack sounded, making James nearly jump. He spun around, and saw that Sirius had arrived – wide-eyed, and yet immensely relieved.  
  
He walked up, glanced at the screaming bundle of quilts in Lily's arms, and brought out his wand with a grin.   
  
"Silencio."  
  
Lily's mouth dropped in horror as she watched her baby cry even harder in frustration that he wasn't making a sound. James let his mouth drop open as well, but only to say, "We needed that, mate."  
  
Lily rounded on James, "We certainly did not!" Her stress seemed to have been accumulating, and now she'd found a good reason to let it all out on her husband. "The poor boy's helpless now! How could you let him do such a – "  
  
"If you'd rather listen," Sirius cut in gravely. "Then by all means, I'm sure you know the counter-curse…"   
  
Lily glanced back down at Harry, and smiled apologetically at her son. "No, that's – that's alright." She had to admit it was a relief to have a little less noise.  
  
Sirius sighed, letting his smile fade from his face. "Well, it's a good thing you weren't here when it happened."  
  
James nodded, narrowing his eyes.  
  
Sirius looked around him before adding casually, "Where were you, anyway? It's early morning by now."  
  
James searched for a response, but Lily got to it first. "We had a warning."  
  
"Oh, really? Who knew, then?"  
  
"It doesn't matter," James said, waving it off.  
  
"No, really. Who was it?"  
  
"It's not important now."  
  
"Prongs."  
  
"It was Snape, alright?" He apparently wasn't too happy admitting it, and Sirius didn't blame him.  
  
"Oh," he said, suddenly failing to find anything funny to say.  
  
James felt a shadow descend upon him, and he turned around to see Rubeus Hagrid looking down at him.   
  
"Is the house alright, Hagrid?" Lily asked tentatively.  
  
Hagrid turned his head. "What? Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's fine. We're jus' abou' done with the tests and all. It's jus' tha' – " he stopped, his voice lowering. "Now that it's clear tha' You-Know-Who knows where yeh live and all, well, yeh migh' want ter think abou' movin'."  
  
Lily turned to see James's face. She knew he wouldn't take it well – he'd lived in this house all his life. James swallowed and nodded his head with difficulty. "Thanks, Hagrid," he managed to say with a forced smile.  
  
Satisfied, Hagrid turned and headed back to where the others were working.  
  
"We won't have to sell it, James," Lily said quickly with reassurance. "It's only temporary."  
  
James nodded distantly. Sirius frowned with the effort of coming up with the perfect line – but to no avail. Clearly James wasn't in the mood. In fact he probably wouldn't be for a long time.  
  
Sirius shook his head. That certainly wouldn't do. 


	32. The Cannons and the Wasps

S*Penweaver: Thank you! I think that's my favorite chapter, so I'm doubly flattered.  
  
Nixiy: I know what you mean. Well, there you have it, they moved.  
  
Nikki: Thank you. *calls to Snape* I'm proud of you! *Snape sneers hatefully* Yeah, my dad's always telling me he's a git on random while he's reading. And I tell him that he's on the right side so shut up. Of course I use kinder words than that.  
  
Gollumgal: Thank you! Hope you like this chapter.  
  
~~  
  
Remus ran up to where Sirius and Peter were standing, extending his hand.  
  
"I got what you asked for," he said. Sirius didn't respond, but only took whatever it was from Remus's hands.  
  
"So this is where Lily and James are staying?" Peter asked, keeping as casual as possible. Sirius nodded his head, a smile spreading across his face.  
  
"Harry too?" Peter persisted. Remus laughed. "Where else would they keep him?"  
  
Peter nodded his head, glancing around. "What street is this again?"  
  
"Why does it matter?" Remus asked.  
  
"Chestnut Way," Sirius answered, giving Remus a sidelong glare. "Best not to tell anyone that, eh Moony?"  
  
Remus narrowed his eyes. "Let's go then, shall we?"  
  
Sirius stopped in his tracks, his mischievous smile fading. "We? No, Moony. Don't you have a wife to tend to, or something?"  
  
Peter didn't say anything, not sure whether he should take sides. After all, if he sided with Sirius, Remus wouldn't be too quick to defend Peter if he needed it. And if he sided with Remus, Sirius wouldn't trust him enough to tell him anything.  
  
Remus looked as pained as ever. Still, he gritted his teeth and didn't move. "He's as much my friend as he is yours."  
  
Sighing in defeat, Sirius felt himself begin to understand that it was true – and yet another half of him couldn't help but wonder...  
  
Peter glanced up quickly at the house before him. 314 Chestnut Way – he'd have to remember that.  
  


* * *

  
It was too dark to see a thing, except in the moonlit hallways, where two figures crept – clad in black. One of them held a pair of gags and blindfolds, and the other held their wand at the ready.  
  
At the end of the hallway, the two assailants split – one to the left, and one to the right.  
  
As one crept towards the baby's room, the other snuck the opposite way, to where Lily and James Potter slept. The attacker set the gags and blindfolds into the pockets of his cloak, while bringing out his wand with the other hand.  
  
Silently, he edged around the bed to where a lump of brilliant red hair was clearly visible. Noting that Lily Potter's breathing was still shallow and that nothing had awoken her yet, the man clad in black whispered a sleeping charm to make sure.  
  
Slowly, he brought out a blindfold, and tied it tight – even if there was no need to. Concluding that a gag was not necessary, he proceeded to the other side of the bed.  
  
Working slowly and carefully, the assailant pointed his wand to the sleeping man's hands. Using his wand he bound them, quick enough that James didn't wake up until it was done. Hastily, the man brought out the gag and blindfold, tying it well enough that James could not see or make a sound.  
  
With a quick grin, the assailant brought his hood up to hide his face, and removed the blindfold – coming to a decision that it would be plenty more entertaining that way.  
  
Meanwhile, the other assailant entered Harry's room. Fighting the urge to kill the boy right away, the well-hidden Death Eater brought out his wand to silence, bound, and levitate the boy. He then concluded a sleeping charm would do a load of good as well.  
  
The two attackers met at the front door, one levitating a struggling man and his sleeping wife, the other with their defenseless child.  
  
Outside stood another man, holding a ministry car's door open.  
  
James let out a cry of surprise and confusion, but it was only muffled by the cloth tied around his mouth.  
  
The man only laughed, and said, "It's for your own good, you know." With horror, James realized he knew that voice very well.  
  
The man who had spoken sat in the back, keeping hold of James while Lily and Harry slept in the next seat.  
  
The car started, and before they knew it, they were speeding down the streets of London.  
  
"You sure you can drive this thing?" the man by James called to the front.  
  
"Better than you can, I'm sure," answered the driver, chuckling. James knew that voice, too, though he told himself it must be someone else.  
  
"Who are you?" he demanded of the man next to him, though his muffled words were barely audible. Nevertheless, the man seemed to understand.  
  
He hesitated, then came to a conclusion. "I might as well," he said. He indicated the ropes around James's hands and said, "It's not like you can do anything about it."  
  
He let his hood down, and laughed out loud at James's reaction. "Yeah, it's me. But don't worry, we're just going to have a little fun. Heaven knows you need it."  
  
"Would you shut up back there, Moony," the driver, who James concluded must be Sirius, called back in irritation. "I'm trying to find out where the stadium is."  
  
Remus rolled his eyes. "Well now that you've ruined the whole principle of blindfolds, he knows he must be going to a Quidditch game."  
  
James beamed with excitement behind the gag stuffed in his mouth.  
  
"The Chuddley Cannons are playing the Wimbourne Wasps," Peter contributed, finally speaking up.  
  
"You can wake Lily and Harry and untie James now," Sirius said. "I'm not sure they'd let us in if we didn't."  
  


* * *

  
James hadn't been to a quidditch game since – well, since the last time he'd played back in school. It was quite different sitting and watching instead of actually flying, but he had to admit, it still gave him the same awe and wonder, even if he remained grounded the whole time.  
  
The fact that they were in the Top Box only added to his excitement.  
  
Despite the fact that he knew Sirius was a huge Cannons fan, James stood firm and rooted who he'd always rooted for – the Wasps.  
  
Their seeker was great, but the player everyone was following was Ludo Bagman, the only beater who could be brutal and lovable at once. Lily agreed, along with the witch next to her, as they gazed dreamily at the handsome, club-equipped black and yellow blur.  
  
James felt a nudge against his seat, and turned around to see what had caused the disturbance. He found that a man who seemed to be a ministry worker had just sat down behind him. The man flashed an apologetic smile.  
  
James nodded. His excited nerves and jittery cheerfulness gave him the feeling that he needed to introduce himself.  
  
"James Potter," he said brightly, holding his hand out. Lily turned her head and looked at her husband disbelievingly.  
  
The man's face quickly fell, and an odd gleam shone through his eyes at the recognition of the spoken name. Only a moment later his happy smile was back in place.  
  
He shook James's hand. "Er – Rookwood."  
  
Peter's head whipped around, and he sunk down in his seat to hide himself from view.  
  
"Wasps or Cannons?" Rookwood asked James offhandedly as he gazed across the Quidditch pitch.  
  
"Wasps all the way," James answered proudly.  
  
Rookwood smiled faintly, still not looking at James. "Got special tickets," he said proudly. "Compliments of Ludo Bagman."  
  
Sirius spun around – all of a sudden immensely interested in the conversation behind him. "You know Bagman?" he said with awe.  
  
Rookwood nodded smugly. "You might say that." He nodded his head toward Peter's slouched, yet obvious figure. "Isn't that right, Pettigrew?"  
  
Sirius and James's eyes lit up in unison, and they both turned their attention to their small friend. "You know them, Wormtrail?"  
  
"I don't know what he's talking about," he said, giving Rookwood a warning glare.  
  
Rookwood replied with a simple smile of self-satisfaction, and sat back in his seat.  
  
James paused in thought. "Hey, Sirius," he said, turning his head. "How *did* you get tickets in the Top Box?"  
  
Sirius laughed nervously. "Nothing illegal. Got 'em from a friend. You might know him – then again you might not."  
  
"Who?"  
  
"Oh, no one," Sirius said casually, waving his hand to dismiss the issue. "Just some bloke I know by the name of Dung."  
  
"Mundungus Fletcher," Lily said with a furious gleam in her eyes.  
  
"Oh, so you know him, do you?" Sirius asked her innocently.  
  
Her voice was full of malice. "He sold you my homework in fifth year," she said heatedly.  
  
Sirius flashed a wicked smile and nudged James in the arm, who lowered his head in shame.  
  
"Oh no, I bought that nice piece of work for my good friend here," Sirius said gravely, and Lily's eyes flashed in James's direction.  
  
James smiled nervously. "I had no choice. You see, I wasn't doing well in Charms that year, and I asked you if you could tutor me," He laughed quickly at the memory. "And you threw your drink in my face, don't you remember?"  
  
Lily folded her arms. "What else could I do? It was the seventeenth time you'd asked me out that whole week."  
  
"Oh, so you were counting, were you?" James replied smugly.  
  
Remus reached over and hit James hard on the arm. "You just missed about five goals, you idiot."  
  
James kissed Lily on the cheek, and took Harry from her. She gave him a lenient smile, noting how thick and dark her son's hair was growing in. It was no mystery that he would grow to look just like James, the only question was – what would he be like? Smiling, she figured it was only a matter of time before he'd be tearing the house apart in a James-like manner.  
  
Between the laughing, cheering, and balancing Harry on his knees, it seemed that James had suddenly become the happiest he'd been for the longest time. She turned to look around her – Peter and Sirius were engrossed with the game, but Remus was watching James and laughing quietly to himself. He must have been thinking the same thing.  
  
Sighing, Lily only hoped it would last long enough for James to endure another year.  
  
~~  
  
AN: Well, I thought too much drama wasn't good. So I did James a favor. But this only means the next chapters will be extra dark. Sorry, but that's what happens when someone like JK Rowling invents a history with so much death. I can't really skip it.  
  
If Rookwood sounds familiar to you, he should.  
  
Review! Please? 


	33. Storm's Eve

Reviews:  
  
~~  
  
Winter came and passed eventually, leaving only the cruel memory of its brutal storms and the promise that the coming Spring promised nothing.  
  
Surely out of frustration, Voldemort sent out the orders to destroy the recently abandoned home of the Potters.  
  
All who attended the Lupin wedding waited in vain. Remus seemed to be the only one who wasn't surprised that Sirius hadn't come as he said he would. Nevertheless, he promised himself that he wouldn't let Sirius Black's blind stupidity keep him from happiness.  
  
Snape, however, was oblivious to the emotional issues of his fellow members of the Order. He was still in his own world of ignorance and denial – ignorance of the danger he was in, and denial of the shred of decency and kindness that had begun to grow within him.  
  
The only times he seemed to realize how wrong he was, was when he saw Peter – someone who he'd once thought as meek and submissive, now growing to become nothing short of what he truly was now – a Death Eater.  
  
Sly, cunning, and willing to go to any lengths to achieve his intent, Peter was beginning to show what seemed to be hidden Slytherin traits he must have bore all along as a Gryffindor.  
  
Snape found that he, a Slytherin to the core, was beginning to prove to be someone Godric Gryffindor would smile upon. It was insulting, disgusting, and entirely his own fault. But what could he do about it? Turn around once again?  
  
The Death Eater meeting was over, but Snape remained lost in thought – finding the cold and meandering gloom of the cave somewhat comforting.  
  
He was broken from his reverie when he noticed someone shorter than him, hooded and hidden. Snape raised his eyebrows in question, and the Death Eater lowered their hood.  
  
Snape found that it was Peter, smirking with his arms crossed. Yes, this little man had changed – that was for sure.  
  
"What?" Snape growled, finding the knowing grin slightly unnerving if not incredibly annoying.  
  
Peter laughed. "Heard what you did."  
  
Snape scowled, his lip curling. "What could I do that you would find so amusing?"  
  
Peter smiled, shaking his head – savoring the irony. But his face dropped before speaking. "That you saved the Potters while I organized their murder."  
  
Snape felt his eye twitching. He couldn't stand this. "It wasn't noble at all, when you think about it. I ruined your plans simply because I don't like you."  
  
Peter shook his head admonishingly, like an adult shaking their finger at a child. "No," he said. "I had nothing to do with it. It was them."  
  
Snape's eyes were spitting fire.  
  
"Remember James? You were supposed to be his enemy."  
  
"Yes," Snape countered. "And you were supposed to be his friend."  
  
Peter sighed in confession. "True, but a man must do what he can to survive."  
  
"I'm not dead, either," Snape replied, disproving the inferiority that Peter was implying.  
  
Peter's eyes widened with gravity. "Oh, but you're worse off than dead. You're soft."  
  
Snape's jaw tightened, and he grew desperate for a reply just as insulting. "If I'm so soft," he began, racking his brain. "Then how is it I can handle two teaching jobs at once?"  
  
Peter pondered briefly, then replied simply, "If Dumbledore trusts you that much, then you must be soft."  
  
Snape slipped his hand into his pocket, gripping his wand tightly behind the folds of his cloak.  
  
"But unfortunately, he doesn't trust you that much."  
  
Snape's anger faltered only slightly, giving way to mild interest. "What makes you say that?"  
  
Peter cherished the simple fact that he knew something Snape didn't. But it was childish to keep it from him, so he answered. "Haven't you heard? Dumbledore has Frank Longbottom set for the Defense Against the Dark Arts position for September."  
  
Snape's jaw dropped, and yet he found that he wasn't very surprised. His hand clenched into a tight fist around his wand, which threatened to snap at any moment.  
  
"Go on," Peter said in challenge. "We both know what you're thinking. Go ahead and kill him."  
  
Snape found himself almost shudder at the thought. His first reaction was shock. He was shocked at the suggestion of murder.  
  
"You can't do it, can you?"  
  
Biting his tongue so hard, it bled, Snape brought out his wand in one swift movement, and when the red beam from the spell perished in the depths of the cave's shadows, Peter fell – unconscious.  
  
Satisfied, but only faintly in comparison to his damaged pride, Snape left Peter alone, face down on the cold earth, deep down beneath the hills of the countryside.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"You do know you're out of milk, don't you?"  
  
James turned to Lily, who sighed in frustration.  
  
"If you want milk so badly, Sirius, get it yourself," she replied sharply.  
  
Sirius frowned as he watched her storm from the kitchen. "Blimey," he said, with a look of incomprehension. "And I thought she'd be nicer once she had the baby."  
  
His eyes widening, James shook his head emphatically.  
  
Sirius shrugged. "But, really. You have no milk."  
  
James opened his mouth, but before he could utter a sound, an owl flew in. His eyes followed the bird closely as it landed on the counter next to Sirius.  
  
James stepped forward to retrieve the letter from the owl, but stepped back with a bitten finger. He made a scornful face at the bird, who hooted indignantly.  
  
"I think he came for you, Padfoot."  
  
Slowly at first, Sirius snatched the letter quickly from the messenger's beak, and opened it immediately – his eyes scanning across the paper. Satisfied, the owl took off with a sharp look at James, who attempted to mend his mangled fingers.  
  
Sirius didn't say a thing, but only ripped the parchment in half, then quarters, and so on until it was beyond repair. James abandoned his injury to gaze ineptly at his friend.  
  
"What was that for?" he asked.  
  
"Nothing," Sirius answered quickly, his eyes narrowing hatefully. His eyes burned not with tears, but with the cruel irony of the memories that were returning to him.  
  
"Sirius?" James began, noticing his look – that look that was so reminiscent of a younger Sirius, a boy no older than sixteen turned up at his front doorstep.  
  
This same boy scowled darkly at the wall. "Nothing important," he muttered. "Only that my brother's dead."  
  
James paused to digest his words and his expression. Somehow it didn't fit. "I though it didn't matter to – "  
  
"It doesn't matter to me," he snapped. "It's only... he died in September, almost seven months ago. It took my mother that long to remember me."  
  
James exhaled heavily as comprehension dawned on him, even though he didn't understand how Sirius felt. He didn't know what it was like to hate people so deeply who had cared for you – given you life. Sirius could remember teaching his brother to tie his shoes, how to hold a wand, and how to ruin a perfectly good birthday cake with his face.  
  
How could he forsake all those years with a simple shrug and a sigh? How could he hate him when he was long dead? And now his mother, that bitter old woman, sat at home alone – the memory of her children all but buried when she'd decided to write a letter.  
  
"That's over now, mate," James said. "We're your family. Peter and Remus and I."  
  
No, James. You have your family. And Remus? He's nothing but an animal. And Peter. Peter wasn't enough – not enough to fill the void that seemed to be growing by the day.  
  
"I have no family," he said finally. Without another word, he left.  
  
James sighed wearily. He stood still and blinked slowly like an old man ready to lay his head down forever and sleep.  
  
This conflict, this hate, this pain – it hadn't always been there. James wondered if he was the only one who could remember at all what it was like to live inside protected walls, to live happily as a child should, to laugh in the face of the danger only because of the fact that there was a glass screen separating him from that outside harm.  
  
Childhood was lost to them by now – but if only they could remember that feeling of content security. . . when there was no risk in friendship, only happiness.  
  
"You'll remember before the end," James said to the air that had settled around his motionless body.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James watched in rapturous awe as he saw himself step forward and walk for the first time. After that triumphant rise, and those victorious and exultant little steps, Harry stumbled again, crashing and burning into the soft carpet.  
  
Lily was smiling in her own euphoria of watching her child succeed. "You think if he's walking so early, that means he's a wizard?"  
  
James let his smile fade. It had never been a question to him – he'd always assumed his son would be a wizard. . . simply because. "It's too early to tell, isn't it?"  
  
Lily grinned wickedly. "My fat nephew can't even crawl yet."  
  
James snorted in surprise and amusement at his wife's sudden brutal honesty. "Aren't all babies fat?"  
  
Lily shook her head gravely. "Not like Dudley."  
  
James frowned, and Lily caught his eye. "You'd have to see it to believe it," she said grimly.  
  
"Daddy."  
  
"What do you want?"  
  
"Daddy," Harry mumbled, repeating the word. For a lack of better words to express himself, he stuck to the small handful of words he knew.  
  
"Appasaw."  
  
"Huh?"  
  
"Appasaw. Appa, appa, appa."  
  
"You think he wants applesauce?" Lily asked quietly while Harry rambled on.  
  
James shook his head in surrender. "For all we know, he could want an orange pony and we wouldn't know it."  
  
Lily rolled her eyes impatiently.  
  
"I don't think he wants anything," James assured her. "He looks happy to me."  
  
Harry watched his Mummy and Daddy talk while he chewed on the end of a pillow.  
  
"Can't we give him that Speech Potion?" James asked.  
  
Harry turned his head. Mummy looked mad.  
  
"Have you heard of the effects that potion could have on a child? He's too young for a potion like that."  
  
"At least he'd be able to talk," James muttered.  
  
Lily shook her head, smiling slightly. "You'd only get jealous that he was more eloquent than you."  
  
Harry looked back at Daddy. He giggled his baby laugh.  
  
Glaring playfully at Mummy, James reached forward to pick up Harry.  
  
"So," he said. "What do you want for your birthday, now?"  
  
"Appasaw."  
  
"I see." James rubbed his chin, and Lily smiled, shaking her head.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snape frowned, shaking his head. This was not good.  
  
And yet, who was he to object? Hadn't he been planning this all along?  
  
"314 Chestnut Way, my Lord. It's in London."  
  
"And they'll be home this time?" Voldemort replied coldly.  
  
Peter narrowed his eyes determinedly, glancing roughly at Snape. "I'll make sure of it."  
  
Who was he to object? 


	34. Fidelity

Disclaimer: This is not my story. It belongs to a filthy rich British woman who shall remain nameless. Only the mistakes are mine.  
  
~~  
  
"Something's wrong."  
  
Albus Dumbledore cast a scrutinizing look across the handful of witches and wizards. Fifteen people in total – excluding Aberforth, of course – was what was left of the bustling crowd that had originally joined.  
  
"All is not well," he continued into the uncomfortable and cheerless silence. It was an obvious statement, but still needing to be said.  
  
Alastor Moody's patience was beginning to run low. The filth of betrayal needed to be aired out in the open. "One of us is not being honest. It's only a matter of time before we find them."  
  
James looked to Peter, who looked to Snape, who returned the glare. Sirius glanced towards Remus, who stood up abruptly.  
  
"This is ridiculous," he declared – that rare spark of irritation flaring. "We know there's a spy. There must be. But if it's one of us, wouldn't it be better to investigate this in secret?"  
  
Sirius folded his arms stubbornly.  
  
Remus shot him a quieting look. "Someone in this room knows what this is all about, and right now they're probably hatching plans to waste whoever it is that knows."  
  
"It's true," Snape growled from the corner. Surprised and disapproving looks were involuntarily sent his way, but he didn't seem to notice. Peter coughed loudly, and Snape smiled slightly.  
  
"It's impossible to know who it is, but I just can't help but marvel at how quickly the Dark Lord knows what we discuss in this room."  
  
Peter was livid, but tried to keep an interested and alert look on his face like everyone else.  
  
Sturgis Podmore appraised Snape coolly before speaking, himself. "If you're in such close contact with his Death Eaters, then why aren't we getting as much information?"  
  
Snape had anticipated something like this. "With all due respect, Dumbledore, you're too trusting. This spy is drinking in your words because you have no other choice but to speak to all of us. The Dark Lord trusts no one. Not even me."  
  
Moody scowled. "Then what good are you?"  
  
Snape returned the scowl with just as much hostility. "Knowing how easy for me it would be to tell the Dark Lord everything I know, you should be more careful with how you speak."  
  
James rolled his eyes. He really was the same creep he'd always been.  
  
"But I do know something," he continued quietly. His eyes met James Potter's. "He knows where you live. He's not just after you. Lily and Harry, too. It's all he talks about."  
  
Peter slammed his fist on the table, causing everything to tremble. He glanced uneasily at the curious faces around him. "That's awful," he mumbled, his eyes spitting fire at Snape, who let a smile reach his eyes that only Peter could detect.  
  
James gawked at Snape, unable to keep his jaw from dropping open. This wasn't the first time he'd done this. Was he really saving them from these attacks, or was he the one organizing everything in order to look like the hero?  
  
Lily spoke for her husband. "What do you suggest we do?" she asked Snape timidly.  
  
Snape looked at her as if she were mad. "You expect me to come up with something? It's not my fault you give out your address to everyone you meet."  
  
James found that familiar hatred engulfing him once again. He should have known. Sirius was glaring furiously, as was Peter, but Remus was the only one who managed to keep his face blank.  
  
"Thank you, Severus," he said evenly, frowning slightly.  
  
"Who did you leave Harry with?" Dumbledore asked quickly.  
  
"Ms. Figg," Lily replied uneasily.  
  
James glanced quickly between Lily and Dumbledore.  
  
Dumbledore observed the ceiling for a moment before giving a small nod of his head. "Dedalus, Elphius, Mr. Podmore, would you please give Arabella a visit? Check the house, outside the house, and make sure the boy's fine. I'm not sure she'd be able to defend herself properly."  
  
Lily could tell Dumbledore had something up his sleeve, but she couldn't exactly tell yet.  
  
"Severus, you may leave as well."  
  
Once the four wizards left, Dumbledore continued. "Mr. Potter." Dumbledore paused. "James, who would you trust your life with?"  
  
James was struck dumb. What was he supposed to say? "You know I trust everyone in this room..."  
  
"That's what worries me," the old man replied wearily. "Remember this isn't just you. Or Lily. It's Harry."  
  
"I'm his Godfather," Sirius announced, standing up. "I should be the one to... well... what exactly is it you want me to do?"  
  
Dumbledore let a smile escape his grave face. "We need a secret keeper. One person."  
  
Remus shook his head at Sirius. "It should be you, Dumbledore. There's no question."  
  
"I'm afraid I can't," he said, turning to face Lupin. "I'm already the secret keeper for this Order. I can't protect them while I'm keeping your own home out of sight."  
  
Sirius snorted derisively.  
  
Dumbledore noted this wearily. "It's settled, then," he said. "Alastor, Frank, Alice, Remus, Peter, Rubeus – you may go."  
  
Everyone left as they were told, including Peter, who gave the room an assimilating look before Disapparating. Remus walked through the large oak doors, and closed them quietly.  
  
Dumbledore turned his gaze to Lily. "Are you familiar with the Fidelius Charm?"  
  
Lily let an involuntary 'yes' roll off her tongue before she caught it. She could see where this was going. "Yes, but I'm not the right person for this, I'm sure."  
  
"You received top marks in Charms, did you not?"  
  
"Yes, but I don't think – "  
  
Dumbledore held up a hand to silence her. "Thank you for volunteering, Mrs. Potter."  
  
Lily opened her mouth in protest, but she smiled instead.  
  
Sirius tipped his chair back on two legs, bringing his hands behind his head. "Does that make me the lucky man of honor?"  
  
Dumbledore nodded gravely in contrast to Sirius's eager enthusiasm.  
  
"I never did like keeping secrets," he replied, grinning. "But I'll try."  
  
"This is no joke, Mr. Black."  
  
Sirius nodded his head submissively.  
  
"The word fidelity – it means complete and absolute loyalty and devotion."  
  
James gave Sirius a sidelong glance.  
  
"You'll do this?"  
  
Sirius nodded again.  
  
"Very well," Dumbledore said with a sigh. "Tomorrow – you, James, and Lily will meet me here. I'll tell you where you're going. I'll give you today to pack your things."  
  
Sirius, Lily, and James looked to each other in silent agreement.  
  
"It's set," James said. "October the 23rd it is."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was dark and late – perhaps even early in the morning – but there was nothing now that could bring Sirius to sleep.  
  
This small flat was where he was going to stay. He wouldn't leave at all. Contact would be most likely forbidden. It would be difficult, but he would do it for James.  
  
But how would people know that he couldn't speak to or owl them – at all? Sure, he could tell people – only a few – but wouldn't it already be obvious? If someone heard the Potters were in hiding and that Sirius Black was missing in action for some reason, wouldn't it be obvious?  
  
Just as swiftly as the thought had come, it quieted all other thoughts until it was all his mind would dare to dwell on.  
  
Was he really doing them a favor? What kind of secrecy would the obvious choice be? And if it wasn't him, who would it be?  
  
Sirius examined the meticulous shadows that crept across the stucco ceiling above him. It would need to be someone trustworthy, rarely noted, small, insignificant, and utterly loyal.  
  
A reminiscent smile came to him as he remembered the days when a small little oddball would relentlessly follow around the three kings of Gryffindor.  
  
Peter – he would never fail.  
  
It was perfect.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James levitated the trunks before him.  
  
"Unca Lupin!" Harry shouted, holding out his arms. Remus smiled, glanced at Lily, who nodded her head. He stepped forward, letting Harry's arms reach his shoulders. He laughed when Harry started to laugh, and lifted him atop his shoulders.  
  
As casual and calm as ever, Sirius Black stepped into the room. He grinned at Harry, and let his eyes meet Remus's.  
  
"What are you doing here?"  
  
"I live here, Padfoot."  
  
Sirius looked back up at Harry, grinned again, and lifted him from Lupin's shoulders. Remus crossed his arms in front of his chest, frowning.  
  
"Daddy?"  
  
Remus turned around. "In here, Jamie."  
  
A small girl stumbled in, wide-eyed and cheerful.  
  
"Say goodbye to Harry."  
  
"Bye!" She waved her tiny arm enthusiastically.  
  
Dumbledore smiled bleakly. "I have a car waiting in front. The Knight Bus is too risky. Come on."  
  
Silently and unmovingly, Remus watched them leave.  
  
The ride was unnaturally quiet. Common sense told them it was just another spin in a muggle car, but now they began to realize the enormity of what they were doing.  
  
As it struck them all individually that they would be hiding for the rest of the war, they began to feel the need to say goodbye. To anyone. From now on they would make no contact and receive no contact. It would be impossible to tell how the world would be when they emerged from their hidden walls of protection.  
  
The car halted in front of an old two story house, overrun with weeds and curling vines that clung to the hidden brick.  
  
Nearly buried by shrubs and trees was a large slab of rock. It must have been the centerpiece for an old garden; remnants of once brilliantly colored flowers were scattered across the brush and overrun paths. Without a closer look, one would assume it was only a large boulder, but behind the dirt and brittle vines was the title "Godric's Hollow".  
  
"There's no need for me to stay," Dumbledore said. Without further indication as to where he'd led them, he left.  
  
"Where's home?" Harry asked quietly, a little confused by the unfamiliar and daunting sight.  
  
Lily swallowed. "This is home."  
  
Harry scrunched up his face in intense thought, but he couldn't quite grasp it.  
  
"Only for a little while," James said. "It's only hide-and-seek, see? We'll stay here and keep quiet until the game's over."  
  
Harry nodded his head in vague understanding, but a disapproving frown remained on his small face.  
  
The four of them walked slowly down the barely discernable path to the front door. Stepping in, they were overwhelmed by the musky smell of dust and mold.  
  
Awkwardly, James glanced around. "So, er, I'll take Harry upstairs and find him a room, and you can, well, prepare."  
  
Lily nodded as one taking orders. She watched James until he was out of sight, and then slowly she brought out her wand.  
  
"Okay," she said. "All we need is the secret keeper," she began.  
  
"That's me."  
  
"Yes. And... the house."  
  
"That's this dump."  
  
"Yeah." She glanced at her wand. "I've never tried this before so – "  
  
"Wait." Sirius held up a hand. "I should tell you... I don't think I'm the right one for the job."  
  
Lily sighed with relief that she didn't have to do the spell quite yet. She shook her head. "You're right," she said.  
  
"I am?"  
  
"I didn't want to tell James," she said uneasily. "It was his decision. But I thought that, well, it'd be too easy for Vo– Vol– "  
  
"Voldemort?"  
  
Lily flinched. "It'd be too easy to figure out. He'd go after you, and... well, he'd do what he had to to make you speak – "  
  
"I wouldn't tell him a thing."  
  
"Well, I know that," Lily said exasperatedly. "But, well, I assume it'd be painful, so it shouldn't have to happen."  
  
Sirius sighed. He wasn't alone in thinking this. "Nobody would expect Peter to be the one."  
  
Lily's eyes brightened. "Exactly."  
  
Sirius let out the breath he'd been holding in for the past 24 hours, finally feeling that he'd gotten somewhere.  
  
"Listen," he said. "Don't tell anyone. Not even Remus. Especially not Remus. And don't tell James until the last minute – he'll only argue."  
  
Lily nodded her head excitedly.  
  
James walked in. "Is it done? Did it work?"  
  
Lily opened her mouth wordlessly.  
  
"She needs more time," Sirius said quickly.  
  
"Alright." James gave them a quizzical look, but shook it off before opening his trunk.  
  
"I'll come back tomorrow," Sirius said quietly, watching James rummage through his things hastily.  
  
"No, wait," he said. He brought out his invisibility cloak. "Here," he said, handing it to Sirius. "Give it to Dumbledore. I'm sure he can put it to use while we're here."  
  
Frowning, Sirius took it.  
  
"And one more thing," James said. "I brought my mirror."  
  
"Your what?"  
  
James grinned. "Don't tell me you'd forgotten those detentions."  
  
He held up a small mirror, and comprehension dawned on Sirius's face. He grinned as well.  
  
Lily looked confused, as they'd expected, but just as Sirius smiled, her face hardened.  
  
"Dumbledore said no contact."  
  
"You know what that is?" Sirius asked incredulously.  
  
Lily rolled her eyes. "James told me."  
  
"I did?"  
  
"You wouldn't stop bragging to me about how you could talk to each other with those stupid mirrors. I never had the nerve to turn you in."  
  
"You told her?"  
  
"I don't remember telling her."  
  
"The important thing is, what if it gets in the wrong hands?" Lily cried.  
  
"It won't," Sirius assured her.  
  
"But – "  
  
"Lily," James said in pacifying tones. "We're in a war. We need to know what's going on."  
  
Lily sighed in frustration because she knew he was right. She could already tell how much it scared him to be completely isolated from the rest of the world, and she had to admit it frightened her, too.  
  
"All right."  
  
"I'll see you three tomorrow," Sirius said, with a meaningful look at Lily. She bound forward and grabbed him in a tight hug before he could escape.  
  
James laughed. "He said he'd see us tomorrow." Of course, he couldn't know that this was the last time he'd see him for a long time, for only Peter would show up tomorrow, and Lily would be left to explain.  
  
Nodding his head at James, Sirius Disapparated. The crack pierced the still air, and echoed until it evanesced, leaving them in a lonely and unbearable silence – wishing the company could have lasted longer.  
  
~~  
  
AN: I'll be lengthening this out. It won't happen next chapter. Actually, the next chapter will be rather long. If anyone feels like yelling at me, feel free to do so. If not, then a nice pleasant review would suffice. 


	35. Secrets of the Blind

I think ff.net is being temperamental, and not sending alerts out. Or maybe the reviews aren't getting sent. Or MAYBE NOBODY LIKES ME! *cries her poor little eyes out*  
  
Well, that was odd, wasn't it?  
  
~~  
  
Peter waited for the blow, which never came. No yelling, no threats, no torture, no murder, no curses. Nothing. Voldemort's eyes merely deepened with fierce gravity.  
  
His silence held more rage than a thousand screams could possibly wield.  
  
Peter stayed rooted to the spot, fearful and unable to tear his eyes from his master's demanding gaze.  
  
So suddenly, it made Peter flinch, he heard the Dark Lord speak, though his lips weren't moving.  
  
"You understand what I can do to you, don't you, Wormtail?" came the cold sound in his mind.  
  
Peter didn't defend himself. He no longer needed his Occlumency – not in front of Voldemort, at least. He no longer had anything to hide or be ashamed of. His countenance was stained with murder and torture, and it pleased his master. He was finished with defending the weak and the righteous, so he willingly surrendered his mind.  
  
He didn't answer. Voldemort got the answer himself, plunging into his servants thoughts. Spoken words weren't enough – not anymore.  
  
"Then don't come back to me until they are dead."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Dumbledore called us here?" Peter glanced around Sirius. There was no one behind him. He'd come as soon as he'd gotten the note. He'd been sure they'd be talking about the Potters.  
  
"Nope," Sirius said shortly, rocking back on his heels. "Just me."  
  
"Listen," Peter said suddenly – his voice stronger. It was different, Sirius could tell, but he only assumed it was the stress of the recent events wearing down on his friend. "D'you think I could – I dunno – see James, or something? I mean, I'm worried, you know?"  
  
Sirius smiled. "Oh, have I got the job for you."  
  
Peter felt a small jolt in his mind. The trusting and unwavering confidence in Sirius's eyes was beginning to prove to Peter that his plans were effective, and his acting hadn't been all that bad.  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"I need you to do me a favor."  
  
"Anything." Peter's heart jumped to a staggeringly fast pace.  
  
"Take place for me as secret keeper, would you?"  
  
He felt a thrill of success. He opened his mouth for his involuntary answer, but stopped himself. This wasn't done yet.  
  
"What for?" he asked inquisitively.  
  
"Well, you see, I'd be the obvious choice, so they'd catch me too quickly. But you... they'd never expect you."  
  
Peter nodded his head in appeasing haste. "Of course."  
  
Sirius sighed, feeling as if the weight of this burden had been lifted from his shoulders. James was safer than ever before.  
  
"Okay," he breathed. "It's 97 Godric's Hollow. Remember that."  
  
Peter glanced skywards. "97 Godric's Hollow."  
  
"Got that?"  
  
"Got it."  
  
"See them tomorrow for the spell. Lily'll know what to do."  
  
"Alright." Peter feigned a look of nervous apprehension.  
  
"And you'll probably have to find a place to hide, yourself. Just tell your mother your moving out – she'll probably be too happy to care."  
  
"Okay."  
  
Sirius let his face fall. "And one more thing, Peter."  
  
Peter scratched his head, nodding for Sirius to continue. What more could he possibly ask of him now?  
  
"Don't tell anyone, *anyone*, about this." Sirius's eyes darkened – not threateningly, but with intense warning. He, of course, meant Remus, but to Peter it held an entirely different meaning.  
  
He smirked inwardly. "Not a soul."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Remus? Is that you?"  
  
As an answer, Remus stepped into the room wearily. He immediately noticed how her robes stretched over to fit her stomach, which was increasingly growing more and more round. They didn't make such a big deal as they had with Jamie, especially with all the bigger things going on around them.  
  
But in so many ways it was a bigger thing to Remus. This was his child. Jamie was more than he could ever ask for. . . but deep inside he couldn't help but remember that he simply wasn't her father.  
  
"I'm here," he said.  
  
She stood when he refused to sit down. "What's the decision? Are you – "  
  
"It's Sirius. They chose Sirius." She wasn't sure, but she could have sworn she'd heard bitterness in his voice.  
  
"That's good – when you think about it. I don't know what Jamie would do if I told her that her father couldn't talk to us or go anywhere."  
  
He shrugged. "Where is she?"  
  
Rebecca smiled. "Playing. Don't worry, I'm keeping an eye on her."  
  
"Are you sure she isn't – "  
  
"Don't try changing the subjects on me," she cut him off knowingly. "There's something bothering you, I know it."  
  
He shook his head. Rebecca narrowed her eyes at him. He nodded his head in confession. "It's Sirius," he burst. "That idiot – he thinks I'm the spy."  
  
"Are you?" she asked him calmly.  
  
"No," he said awkwardly.  
  
"Then why should it bother you?"  
  
He stopped, caught off guard.  
  
He shook his head. "I dunno," he mumbled.  
  
"He knows you, Remus. He knows he's wrong."  
  
"It's that damn wolf," he spat. His eyes filled with pain and hatred for himself – so much, it shocked Rebecca out of her calm assurance.  
  
"It's not you," she began uneasily.  
  
"Of course it isn't. But does he see that?"  
  
"Of course he does, Remus."  
  
"No," he corrected her. "He used to."  
  
"He still does," she persisted. "He's just confused, that's all."  
  
"I'd be confused too if I had to control a wild animal that tried to kill me every month, only to be apologized to the next day."  
  
"Stop doing this to yourself," Rebecca pleaded.  
  
"I never meant to hurt him," he continued, ignoring her. "I never meant to hurt anyone."  
  
"Of course not," she answered soothingly. "You wouldn't do that."  
  
"I'd never hurt anyone."  
  
"You're right," Rebecca said firmly, turning his head to face her, tracing a deep scar on his cheek with her finger. "Only yourself."  
  
He surrendered his bitter complaint.  
  
"Now you stop it," she said sternly. She had to admit, she was a bit disturbed by it. She'd never seen him act anything short of calm and composed. She'd always had him to comfort her – but now it was her time to return the favor.  
  
"You have a family now. Just calm down and we'll wait this out."  
  
"Can you See anything?" he asked her quietly. His hope was all but gone, she could tell.  
  
"No."  
  
"You could before," he offered.  
  
She took a reflective pause. He was right. Her Sight had gotten stronger and stronger, until finally it collapsed. She could still do the trivial things of the present – watch Jamie in the other room, feel other's emotions – but the future was all but lost to her.  
  
"I could. I still can, I'm sure. . ." She stopped. How much time did she have left anyway? ". . .just not now."  
  
"Why'd it stop?" he asked, a little troubled.  
  
"I don't know," she said – more to herself than to him. "I could See things I couldn't See before. It got to the point where I couldn't control them. They came without my bidding."  
  
"You told me it felt like you were counting down to something."  
  
"Yeah," she said distantly.  
  
"And you think it's come?"  
  
She bit her lip – hard. Certainly she'd stopped Seeing because her life was nearing its end. But something else was coming. That's what she'd been feeling all along. But now that her gift was all but gone, she found she had no warning with which to stop it.  
  
It was inevitable.  
  
"Yes, it's come."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
CRACK.  
  
"That's Sirius," James said in relief. He got up from the tattered couch, anxious to get this over with.  
  
"In here, James," Lily said. She was already there.  
  
"Let me explain."  
  
James stopped dead. "Peter?" he said bewilderedly.  
  
Lily smiled calmly. "Yes. He's going to be our secret keeper."  
  
"Wh – why?" he stammered.  
  
"Sirius was the obvious choice," Peter said.  
  
"It was too dangerous," Lily finished.  
  
James sighed in frustration. "Lily, there's a perfectly good reason I chose Sirius."  
  
She crossed her arms over her chest. "And what's that?"  
  
Harry ran into the room. "Seewus, See – " He stopped, and dropped his arms to his side when he saw Peter. He looked to his father for an explanation. "Where Seewus?"  
  
Peter laughed nervously, and smiled at Harry warmly. He stepped forward and got to his knees so he was down on Harry's level. "Hey, you."  
  
James glanced nervously at Peter, stepped forward, and whispered, "There's a reason I didn't choose Peter. Ever think of that?"  
  
Lily's mouth dropped open. "He's been nothing but loyal to you, James. He's your friend, and he wants to help."  
  
"I wouldn't be too sure of that."  
  
"We need him," Lily said loudly. Peter turned around, and stood up, looking expectantly to James.  
  
"Thanks, mate," he muttered, forcing a smile.  
  
Lily nodded her head approvingly. "Let's do this," she said, bringing out her wand. "Ready?"  
  
Peter smiled.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Tired of tapping his fingers, James picked up his mirror from the table beside him.  
  
"Sirius," he said.  
  
Within seconds, that very face appeared. "What happened?" came the worried voice.  
  
"Nothing catastrophic," James replied indifferently.  
  
"James?" Sirius said. His eyes were searching. "I can't see you."  
  
"Of course you can't," James said in bored tones. "I'm in hiding – only Peter could."  
  
Sirius lowered his eyes. "So he did it, eh?"  
  
"Yeah," came the angry reply. "Scared, were you?"  
  
Sirius shook his head. "You know it was the better choice."  
  
"It was my choice."  
  
"It was Lily's, too," Sirius countered.  
  
James rolled his eyes, though Sirius was unaware of the reaction. "Well then, we might as well include Harry's vote, and he wasn't too happy to see Peter, either."  
  
"Have some faith in the guy, Prongs."  
  
"I've tried," James said. "But I guess I don't have a choice now, do I?"  
  
"No, you don't," Sirius said, grinning as he always did. "Now stop worrying. You're in hiding, you should be throwing a party or something. Remember the riots we used to make in the common room?"  
  
James smiled, and Sirius seemed to have sensed it.  
  
"Like that."  
  
James shook his head – remotely grateful that he had Sirius as a friend. "Don't forget to let me know if anything important happens – like if Voldemort snuffs it, or something."  
  
Sirius laughed. "As long as you let me know if you're dead."  
  
"I'm not laughing, Padfoot."  
  
"You're safe," Sirius said. "So stop complaining. Nothing will happen to you, do you hear me? Nothing."  
  
"You sure about that?" James bore a skeptical smile.  
  
But Sirius didn't smile. "I promise. As Harry's Godfather, Lily's friend, and your brother I won't let a thing happen to you. Not under my watch."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Ah, the irony. The one who's looking out for them the most is the one who's giving them away to the slimiest git that ever spoke in a British accent.  
  
Reviews:  
  
Prongs4: I think everything here's broken. Holy monkey buckets! 34 chapters? *looks around* Have I really written that much?  
  
Miss Piratess: Ooh, hey suspense is good! Poor Snape, having to be all sentimental and compassionate because I said so and because he had subway for lunch. Thanks for the reviews, they make me happy. And happy's good. Oh, and I'll send Sirius a memo with everything you said. I don't think he'll take it well, though.  
  
GollumGal: I hate Peter, too. And Snape. Though I like making fun of him, so he's good to have around.  
  
Awkward: At least they died quickly... before they could have had the time to realize their mistake. Ha, that reminds me – in History we read about this guy named Vladmir and my teacher called him Voldemort. I think I was the only one who laughed. 


	36. The Rise and Fall

AN: The school librarian is especially vindictive today, so I have no time for answering reviews. Though, there were so many, so thanks to EVERYBODY.  
  
~~  
  
"I have news, my Lord."  
  
The Dark Lord's eyes flared. "You." The word came like ice. "You have caused me enough failure."  
  
But Peter smiled. "You could not possibly fail. Not with what I have for you."  
  
Whatever intrigue now had a hold of Voldemort was not hidden well. "What is it?"  
  
Wormtail's lip curled. "Many secrets, my Lord."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"The signs of a werewolf are listed in your books on page – " The professor stopped when he noticed one of his students had his hand up.  
  
"Mr. Weasley?"  
  
Bill cleared his throat. "Sorry Professor Longbottom, but I was wondering... has anyone survived the Avada Kedavra curse?"  
  
The professor stood in front of the board, his mouth hanging open. "I – I don't – how is this relevant to the lesson, Mr. Weasley?"  
  
Bill smiled. "It isn't, professor."  
  
However, Professor Longbottom smiled, shaking his head. "I remember one of my first year students asking me the same question this morning."  
  
"Yeah, that was my brother, Charlie. He told me you refused to answer, so I thought I'd give it a try." The class laughed.  
  
The professor gave it a moment of thought, then replied, "I've known no one who's survived a hit from that curse – the Killing Curse, that is – but that doesn't mean it can't happen." The classed hushed.  
  
"Perhaps," he said. "Perhaps the times will change. Perhaps someone will stand against it... against this chaos. I assume that's what inspired the question, Mr. Weasley?"  
  
Bill nodded.  
  
"Well, perhaps that very person will show us the way – defy death. Perhaps someday we'll understand why."  
  
Each student glanced to one another restlessly. They had no clue what their teacher was speaking of, and they were beginning to think he didn't, either. Defying death? Surely, he wasn't making any sense?  
  
But as he stood before them, the professor thought fleetingly of his son – and what he could be. Perhaps he was the one?  
  
"There's a cure for everything, I'm sure," he said in conclusion. "It's only a question of how long it takes for us to discover it."  
  
"Even for werewolves?" called one of the voices in the back.  
  
The professor smiled. "Thank you, Mr. Shaklebolt, for leading us back to the lesson."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"We can't strike immediately," Voldemort said ponderously. Wormtail nodded his head, urging his master to continue speculating.  
  
"They are too cautious in the beginning."  
  
"Yes, my Lord."  
  
Voldemort glanced harshly at him. Peter lowered his head in humility.  
  
"We will have to wait – but not for too long. They may give up after too long. And we cannot let a rat leave its corner, can we now?"  
  
Wormtail shook his head, pressing his mouth shut lest he let a word slip. Voldemort smiled, noting how much power he could wield over his servant – this worthless, yet incredibly fortunate servant.  
  
"They'll wait as we wait for the 31st." He laughed a cruel, sickeningly joyful laugh. "Come now, Wormtail. Imagine dying on the night of the dead."  
  
He marveled at his own heartless brilliance.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"We could have lived beautifully." Lily sighed, and James cast a weary look her way.  
  
"A tall, white house, with a brilliant garden, and stone steps leading towards the front door." Harry quieted to listen. "Friends would come by to visit often. Harry could play in the yard. There'd be trees to climb, and fruit to pick. He could play all day with his little sister..."  
  
"Sister?" James cut in dubiously.  
  
Lily shrugged, sighing. "We could have lived beautifully. But we can't – not anymore."  
  
"Lily – "  
  
"No. It's over, James. Even when we do get out this... place... things will never be the same. Harry will live to defeat Voldemort, remember? Which means he will reign for years to come – or at least until Harry can hold a wand properly."  
  
Harry frowned. Nothing made sense.  
  
"But what about Neville Longbottom? Isn't he also a possibility? Maybe it won't be Harry..."  
  
Lily shook her head. "All the same, we'll have to wait. I don't know how long I can hide, James."  
  
"But there're things Dumbledore hasn't told us," said James hopefully. "He even said we didn't know it all. Maybe there's hope. Maybe it'll be okay."  
  
Lily's face grew bitter and her lip trembled. "You'd think if the other half of it all were at all pleasant, he'd tell us."  
  
James swallowed the lump in his throat.  
  
"He chose not to tell us the other half for a reason, James. He doesn't want us to know what will happen – so we won't stop it."  
  
"Things will happen, of course," James agreed. "And there's no doubt he knows more than we do. But we can't blame him for that."  
  
"No," Lily said. "There's only one man who's to blame for all of this." Her eyes brimmed with tears. "After all he did – all the lives he took away from us – from everyone." Her weeping eyes shone with despair... and hate.  
  
"It's a pity we can only kill him once."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Wormtail. It was here, you said?"  
  
"On this street, my Lord." He pointed his finger to an empty lot of weeds and stones covered in the ruins of old vines and dead trees. "It's standing there."  
  
"I do not see it. What must I do to see it?"  
  
"It's number 97 of Godric's Hollow. Just remember that, my Lord."  
  
Wormtail began to step back until he was no longer by his master's side. Voldemort surveyed the empty lot, and slowly – ever so slowly – the ground underneath began to stretch and rumble to fit what was beginning to come forth.  
  
A house, beyond neglect and devoid of care and beauty. It stood, looming in the night – lonely and somewhat inviting. The Dark Lord smiled triumphantly.  
  
"I've won."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
James lay next to Lily, wide awake and alert. The last time he'd fallen asleep at a time like this, he'd awoken to find his parents dead. He wouldn't close his eyes when the time demanded that he stay awake. Stay awake and alert. Over and over, his heart would whisper it to him. Never sleep, never die.  
  
For days he'd anticipated this. Night and day he listened – he knew something would have to come eventually, whether it be good or ill. It could be a friend on the doorstep, or his own doom – he did not know. But sooner or later something would have to come.  
  
As his thoughts continued, they began to spiral down into a dreamlike state. He could feel himself being dragged down into the welcoming arms of gentle slumber, and for once he didn't protest.  
  
As soon as his weary eyes had closed, and his head had been laid to rest, the floors below him shook with a resounding boom. Lily was up before James had time to register the sound in his mind.  
  
"James?" Her voice was trembling with fear.  
  
"Stay here," came the swift reply.  
  
James fled from the room, jumped down a few stairs, and within seconds came stumbling back up in clumsy panic.  
  
"Lily, take Harry and go! It's him! Go! Run! I'll hold him off – "  
  
"How will I get out?" she cried, but James didn't answer, he only ran back, kissed her firmly and desperately, and ran back to the landing of the stairs. She was momentarily bewildered, but then realized what the intent was. That kiss was goodbye.  
  
She stumbled from the room, hearing a distant crack and rumble through the walls as a door was forced open.  
  
She ran to where Harry was sleeping – or used to be sleeping. He was wide awake now, and crying his eyes out. She held him close to her, searching around the room for a way out. But there was nothing, not even a window.  
  
She heard the shatter of glass, the upturning of a table, and what had to be... Harry cried harder, drowning out his mother's own cry of despair. She heard the fall of a dead body below her.  
  
"Sleep," she whimpered. "Sleep, please. Close your eyes... you shouldn't have to see..."  
  
The door creaked open, a cackling laughter behind it. "What kind of fate is this?" she cried.  
  
Voldemort held his wand before him, stepping forward, advancing towards Harry.  
  
"Not Harry! Not Harry! Please – I'll do anything – "  
  
Voldemort smiled. This was the kind of sweet struggle he'd been hoping for. "Stand aside," he said quietly, but she shook her head defiantly. "Stand aside, girl!" He laughed when he found how much fear he'd put into her.  
  
"Not Harry, not Harry, please not Harry!"  
  
"Stand aside, you silly girl... stand aside now..." He was quickly becoming annoyed with his miserable prey.  
  
She put Harry back in his crib, and stood firm in front of it – shaking from head to foot. "Not Harry, please no, take me, kill me instead – " Nothing could save her, she knew it. All she could hold on to now was her blind maternal instinct. "Kill me instead," she pleaded.  
  
"I will, don't you worry. I'll deal with you later, now stand aside!"  
  
She fell to the floor, weeping and screaming with whatever pleas she had the strength left to scream for. At the end of all things, at the foot of her deadliest enemy, all she had left was mercy. The want of mercy, the need of mercy...  
  
"Not Harry! Please... have mercy... have mercy..."  
  
Voldemort laughed. This was what always amused him most. The point where people came to the pitiful end of their existence and clung to the delusion that mercy was what could save them.  
  
They always held to the hope that he had mercy for them.  
  
The curse hit her, silencing her.  
  
Voldemort laughed louder than ever, advancing on Harry... his very own downfall.  
  
"This is your victory, Harry." The child screamed louder, his mouth nearly swallowing the rest of his face.  
  
"Not going to fight me? What kind of a wizard are you?" He laughed, bringing his wand before him – right between the boy's eyes.  
  
Suddenly, the boy fell silent. His face lost its pleading shape of misery and blind fear – and he gazed at his predator mildly, as one watching a rainbow begin to shine through the clouds.  
  
He'd been hoping to torture the boy for a while, but his vacant expression was beginning to make Voldemort uneasy.  
  
"Avada Kedavra."  
  
As suddenly as the crying had stopped, a new noise erupted. The beam shot forth, rebounding from the boy twice as lethally brilliant as it had been set out to be.  
  
Before the Dark Lord had time to accept his defeat, his body was lifeless – and his spirit fled with all the raging panic it could possibly contain.  
  
Emerald green shone through the room, filtering out through the windows, utterly shattering all it hit. The destruction was deafening.  
  
Within the eternal second it had commenced, it was gone the next.  
  
Harry blinked his confused eyes, glancing around at the ruins he lay in, and slowly, he remembered his own discontent and began to cry again.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: I have got to start a comedy again, or I'll just blow up with angst. 


	37. The Final Betrayal

So many reviews. Not to mention such LONG reviews. It wouldn't be right to say the same thing over and over to each of you, so I'll say it now. First off.  
  
1) No, this not the end. It's really sort of the beginning of the fanfiction. Everything else was just a tiny interpretation of details that went too far (about 30 chapters too far). This is where the story I cooked up a year ago begins. At least, once I arrest Sirius.  
  
2) sadly, my summary does have to do with the story.   
  
3) yes, things will get happier. Just not right now. ;D  
  
4) You guys have seriously affected me - directly. I used to think this was only a hobby, like an excuse for not doing my spanish homework. But the encouragement is just so OVERWHELMING. I'm starting to think that maybe I should be writing?  
  
5) Nobody in their right mind could take credit for this an not feel awful about it. Just imagine if Rowling had wrote it. It is her story, after all.  
  
6) Here's the chapter you wanted. I just hope it's not dissapointing, seeing as all of you are expecting a miracle out of me, or something.  
  
That said, I'll shut up.   
  
~~  
  
Peter stood before the site of disaster – thunderstruck.  
  
He'd been sure that if he'd only stayed and waited, his master would have promised him an overwhelming reward in his triumphant euphoria. But as each minute passed, Peter began to understand that something had gone terribly wrong.  
  
He'd never seen a Killing Curse do damage like that. He was certain no one could have survived that blast. Perhaps it was intentional. Maybe it was only the Dark Lord's rage unleashed. Surely only someone like him could have done damage like this?  
  
But just when Peter had come to the conclusion that that was all it was – that Voldemort had Disapparated as soon as he'd finished – he heard the faint, distant echo of a child's cry.  
  
Without a doubt, he knew what that had to mean – Harry was alive, and Peter's master had left him.  
  
His face contorted with horror. It was over for him. Voldemort had to be dead. He wouldn't have left without killing Harry Potter… and here the child was – unscathed.  
  
In the very hour where Peter had shown his true colors and destroyed everything he'd once valued for some greater glory, the glory was gone. . . leaving the horrible parody of laughter amidst the rustle of swaying trees.  
  
It was hard to say how long he'd stood there – thinking, planning, wondering, and dreading. But just as the moon began to set behind the tall trees in the distance, Peter heard a sound that caused him to flee.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sirius had been planning this visit all week. He thought it'd be better if he didn't tell Peter when he'd be checking up on him. . . that way word didn't get out. Owls were too risky, and telling him face to face only risked eavesdropping.  
  
Besides, it wasn't like he was going to interrupt anything.  
  
Sirius stepped up to the small house. It was run down and nestled in the middle of a thick horseshoe of trees. It didn't stand out, and you would probably never find it unless you knew it was there.  
  
Sirius knocked, and after several minutes of silence, finally decided against it. He turned the knob, but the door was locked. Cursing under his breath, Sirius brought out his wand. Impatiently, he blew the door open. He'd only meant to unlock it, but excited nerves and growing fear had only added to the mix.  
  
"Peter?" he called. Silence was all that answered. "You blockhead, wake up." He sprinted down the hallway. "Where are you?"  
  
This wasn't right. It couldn't be right. It was Halloween, but Peter wouldn't go out, would he? It's not like he had any friends besides them.  
  
Hastily, he brought out the small mirror from his pocket. James would know. . . Peter would have told him if he'd left.  
  
"James," he said quickly.  
  
"James!"  
  
As a fresh wave of panic set in, Sirius Disapparated.  
  
Instantly, his own flat was in view. He ran through clumsily, threw himself onto his motorbike, and sped off into the night. If something was wrong. . . he didn't want to think about it. . . but if there were dead bodies – or injured (he decided injured was a better word to think of) he wouldn't be able to Apparate with them.  
  
He nearly missed the house because he'd been scoping out for an empty lot. . . but in the area there presently were no empty lots.  
  
He lowered the bike down to where the house was supposed to be hidden. All that was there was a giant pile of rubbish – the remains of an old home blown apart.  
  
His heart staggered, and his face went deathly white.  
  
In the distance, he could see a large figure – a familiar figure. "Hello?" he called. The figure turned around. It was Hagrid. . . holding Harry.  
  
It was a terrible sight. The boy's forehead was torn open, and blood was streaming down his screaming face. Sirius gasped for breath, shaking like mad.  
  
"James?" he whimpered. Hagrid shook his head slowly, his face already wet with tears.  
  
Sirius could feel the weight of his body bearing down intensely on his knees, which were buckling. He fell to the ground – sobbing in the cold dirt. Each cry dragged him lower and lower until he forgot that he had life in him.   
  
He clenched his jaw tightly. "Harry," he mumbled. He still had Harry. He wearily got to his feet. Hagrid's face stretched with the effort of keeping from crying, himself.  
  
"Got me orders from Dumbledore. Had some'un watching down the street, and they told 'im. I'm sorry, Sirius. I'm so sorry."  
  
"Give Harry to me, Hagrid," Sirius said, not bearing to look the poor child in the face. "I'm his Godfather, I'll look after him."  
  
Hagrid sighed. "Sorry. Dumbledore – he said Harry'd be livin' with his aunt n' uncle. Don't know why, but I think he has a plan. Don't yeh worry, he'll be safe."  
  
Sirius suddenly lost all he had left in the world. Nodding his head numbly, he painfully accepted it. It was Dumbledore's will… It had been Dumbledore's bloody will for him, Sirius, to keep these secrets. There was only one person to find now. The gaping void in his heart only left enough space for the deepest hatred and rage he could possibly contain.  
  
"Take my bike," Sirius said with much effort. "I won't need it anymore."  
  
Hagrid frowned incredulously, and Sirius turned his back on his wasted life. . . destroyed, utterly wasted and destroyed, because of him.  
  
There was only one person to find, and that person was Peter Pettigrew.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter fled the scene when Hagrid arrived. For once, he hadn't made a mess of things, hadn't chosen the wrong side, hadn't killed his chances of success by his own stupidity. . . and yet he still was running – empty-handed, guilty, and scared beyond reason.  
  
Things had definitely gone terribly wrong, and for once it wasn't his fault. But he would still be the one to pay. As long as Sirius was alive and well, Peter would forever be the one to pay.  
  
He was destroyed. . . utterly wasted and destroyed.  
  
There was only one person to find, and that person was Sirius Black.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
*Where would I go if I were a rat?* Sirius thought angrily. He'd been searching everywhere. He'd tried Diagon Alley, Hogsmeade – all the obvious places.  
  
But then it hit him. Peter still had family – he'd say goodbye, wouldn't he?  
  
No, Sirius thought. Peter didn't care about anyone. He couldn't have if he'd done something like this. But after all, maybe Peter was already dead?  
  
The spy. The word triggered a memory in Sirius's mind. Remus.  
  
If Peter was the spy – if he'd been all along – then there was still someone he had left. Someone he'd treated awfully. Someone who would be just as enraged to hear the news.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Peter's thoughts raced. He had to find Sirius. If not to kill him, then to remove all doubt that he was the guilty one. The trouble was. . . where would Sirius go?  
  
Certainly, he'd catch on quickly. He'd always been sharp like James.  
  
Sirius wouldn't be accepting apologies. In fact, he was probably looking for him now. So, now all Peter had to figure out was where Sirius would *think* he was.  
  
He tried Hogsmeade, Diagon Alley – all the obvious places. But then he thought that maybe Sirius had taken a different approach – gathering allies.  
  
Surely, Remus would be just as enraged to hear the news.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sirius stumbled along the street. He couldn't Apparate to the house, or else he could wake muggle neighbors, and push them into curiosity at what had made the sound outside.  
  
At a time when Sirius felt as murderous as this, it wasn't wise to have any witnesses.  
  
But before he could reach the street that lead into the woody area where Remus's house was hidden, he found someone already ahead of him, facing him.  
  
"I thought I'd find you here," the person said.  
  
"Peter," Sirius muttered fiercely. As he drew closer, he could see the wizard was smiling. Sirius wasn't sure, but he didn't want to think of the possibility that Wormtail might have something up his sleeve.  
  
"Was it you?" Sirius asked him shakily.  
  
Peter lifted his wand in the air. "Shall I make it known to the world?"  
  
"I'll kill you!" Sirius said, struggling to keep his voice down. His hand inched closer to the pocket of his robes where his wand was, and Peter snapped his wrist towards Sirius, sending red sparks his way.  
  
"Imagine killing your only proof? Shall I wake the muggles?" His wand rose higher in the air.  
  
Sirius gave him a threatening look, and Peter smiled all the more. From his wand erupted a loud cracking sound and a flurry of red sparks that invaded the night air.  
  
Sirius wasn't too confident with his wand, knowing he had no spell with which to block a Killing Curse. He merely separated his feet in preparation for jumping aside.  
  
But Peter didn't strike. He made another loud cracking noise with his wand, and waited until people had poked their heads out their front doors.   
  
Peter lowered his wand to Sirius's level, and Sirius tried to keep his own hand from shaking. He had to find the right opportunity to reach for his wand. Meanwhile, some of the more bold and curious muggles stepped out of their houses entirely.  
  
At this point, Peter hid his wand behind his back with one hand, to give the impression that he was unarmed.  
  
"How long has this been going on?" Sirius muttered, only loud enough for Peter to hear.  
  
"Whatever are you talking about?"  
  
"You know what I'm talking about. Voldemort."  
  
Peter cringed only slightly. "I had no choice," he said mildly.  
  
"No choice?" Sirius exclaimed quietly.  
  
"He was too powerful – I had no choice."  
  
"A confession," Sirius bellowed to the witnesses, who frowned in bewilderment.  
  
Peter swallowed hard, pulling something out of his pocket that Sirius couldn't identify clearly. "I can't believe you'd do this, Sirius."  
  
"Do what?"  
  
"You know what I'm talking about," he said, raising his voice. He closed his eyes as one steeling themself for excruciating pain. "You were their secret keeper, weren't you?"  
  
Sirius clenched his jaw and Peter feigned a look of misery and anger. He screamed in a sobbing voice, "Lily and James, Sirius! How could you?"  
  
Sirius felt the hot knives of rage pierce him. He brandished his wand, Peter cried out in pain as one of his hands slipped, and from behind his back came a blinding flash of white light.  
  
Sirius stumbled back, shielding his ears from the deafening blow. The light left a shallow mist, which slowly faded, and Sirius could see the hazy outlines of fallen bodies. To his right he saw something scurry as a rat would, down into the sewers.  
  
Sirius yelled out, jumping for the sewers, but narrowly missing Peter's tail. He stood, enraged and bitterly defeated. He looked up at the houses, and immediately heard muffled shrieks of fright and the sound of windows being shut.  
  
"Damn!" Sirius muttered furiously.  
  
He surveyed the street – or rather what was left of it. He found something crimson glinting in the moonlight, and tentatively, he approached it.   
  
Accompanying a bloody mass of skin in the indistinct shape of a finger was a knife – a knife Sirius instantly recognized. It was the one he'd given Peter as a gift.  
  
The irony hit him like an arrow. It was his fault. He'd given Peter everything he needed. The knife, the secrets, and his unwavering trust. It must have been the best day of the bloody rat's miserable life.  
  
His eyes numbly traveled upwards to where the sky was lightening to a musky gray. The fog was already settling, bringing with it an eerie silence.  
  
Amidst that silence a loud cracking sound erupted, followed by a series of more noises. People had Apparated behind him.  
  
"Merlin's beard!" one of them said softly. "Who did this?"  
  
Sirius laughed, noting how suspicious it must have looked to see him with his wand out, in the middle of a giant crater littered with a dozen bodies, standing over a heap of bloodstained robes and the fragment of a finger.  
  
One of the muggles had come out, sobbing. "He did it!" she cried, pointing her accusing finger at Sirius. "He killed them all! My Robbie just came out to see. . ." She broke down next to the huddled figure of a man in pajamas.  
  
Sirius turned around miserably, feeling dizzy – and still laughing. "Who are you?" he asked ineptly, like a drunken man. He felt as if he were going mad. He could still feel the wrenching pain that was tearing his soul and his sanity apart.   
  
"Cornelius Fudge, Junior Minister of the Department of Magical Catastrophes, and you are under arrest."  
  
"I killed them," Sirius mumbled disbelievingly as two wizards seized him with their wands. "I killed them all."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~ 


	38. Morning News

"Mum, come and look!" Percy cried happily. "Come and see, mum!"  
  
"Not now, Percy," she said offhandedly, as she picked up her Daily Prophet. She seemed transfixed by her paper, and somewhat overjoyed.  
  
Percy frowned, disappointed. He'd go brag to Fred and George about what he'd found.  
  
"Fred! George! I want to show you something!"  
  
"Quiet down, Percy, you'll wake Ginny."  
  
Obediently, Percy hushed. He ran outside and found Fred and George sitting in a giant puddle of dirty water.  
  
"What are you two doing?" he asked, crossing his arms in front of his chest.  
  
"Mud pie!" Fred shouted, and George threw a large glob of mud that landed suspiciously close to Percy.  
  
"Mum'll get you for this," he said warily.  
  
"What do you want, anyway?" Fred asked, standing up – which wasn't a very impressive act, seeing as he was only three and came to Percy's navel.  
  
"Look what I found!" he whispered as he dotingly prized his hands open.  
  
"It's a rat," Fred said flatly.  
  
"Isn't he cute, though?" Percy asked expectantly.  
  
"Yeah," George answered sarcastically. "Look's just like his mum, doesn't he?" Fred sniggered, falling back into the mud in hysterics.  
  
Percy stuck his nose in the air. "Not my fault you'll never get to hold Scabbers."  
  
"Why'd I want to hold an ugly thing like that?" George asked.  
  
"Yeah," Fred said. "Call him Scabbers, you make him sound like a disease."  
  
Percy frowned scornfully, and turned back to his rat. "I won't let anything happen to you, Scabbers. Especially not those two." The rat squeaked gratefully.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What have I got behind my back?" Remus asked.  
  
Jamie screwed her face in concentration and closed her eyes tightly.  
  
Rebecca sighed. "Are you testing her again, Remus?"  
  
Remus nodded, smiling at Jamie, who beamed. "Daily Puppet!"  
  
"Daily Prophet," Remus corrected her, chuckling.  
  
"Let me see that," Rebecca said, snatching the paper from Remus's hands. "Have you read it yet?"  
  
"No," he said. "What's it say?"  
  
Rebecca turned the page. "Oh, just some wizard that got awarded an Order of Merlin, First Class. Doesn't look too exciting. Looks like someone was arrested for his murder this morning."  
  
"That's the front page?" Remus asked incredulously.  
  
"No," Rebecca said. "I skipped that. It's usually just rubbish they put on the front to catch people's attention."  
  
"Well, what rubbish do we have today?" Remus said, laughing.  
  
"You take it," Rebecca said, holding out the paper.  
  
Remus grinned and took the paper.  
  
"I didn't get any sleep last night," Rebecca said with a sigh. "Had the strangest dream."  
  
"Voldemort defeated?" Remus exclaimed.  
  
"Don't say that name in front of..." Rebecca stopped herself. "What did you say?"  
  
Remus continued reading, and Rebecca sat down slowly, her eyes fixed on Remus.  
  
"No," he said. His eyes widened with horror and he threw the paper from him as if it had burned his hands.  
  
"What?" Rebecca asked him.  
  
"No." He shook his head. "No."  
  
"Remus, what? Speak to me!"  
  
He glanced at her, and then to Jamie. "I have to leave," he said abruptly. His face was white, and he looked ill.  
  
"Tell me, Remus!"  
  
He took a shaky breath. "It's all in the paper. Sorry, but I have to go somewhere..."  
  
"Where are you going?" Rebecca asked, picking up the paper from where it had been discarded.  
  
"Anywhere," Remus said breathlessly. Inside, he knew where he was going, what he was going to do – but he couldn't possibly say it in front of his family. He would kill him...  
  
Something triggered in his mind. "What did the paper say?"  
  
Rebecca frowned. "Didn't you just read it?"  
  
"No," he said. "After that. Who was arrested for murder?"  
  
Rebecca narrowed her eyes, and opened the paper. "Early this morning, Ministry officials Apparated to... hey that's just down the street!"  
  
"What does it say?" Remus said evenly.  
  
"...for the arrest of... of Sirius Black."  
  
"Damn you," Remus muttered under his breath, and Disapparated without another word.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The world was in a state of utter joy. Witches and wizards rejoiced, people were excused from work, Hogwarts students were exempt from their studies, and owls had invaded the air.  
  
It was like a national holiday. Everyone was celebrating and everyone knew why. Evil was gone – Voldemort had been defeated in the night. Everyone was buzzing with more news, and the story on everybody's lips was the one of the small boy named Harry Potter.  
  
So many had told it different ways, that some merely dismissed it as a crazy rumor. But as November 1st wore on, and it seemed that everyone knew of the story and testified of its truth, these people were forced to accept it as fact.  
  
But where this miraculous boy was now that he had no home, nobody could tell.  
  
To the muggles' eyes, which were blind to the news of witches and wizards, it seemed that a large group of people had woken up and left their homes all simultaneously cheerful. They didn't know it, they needn't know it, but someone had saved them all from a nameless fear they wouldn't have been able to acknowledge until they'd been killed by him.  
  
But among the large host of people that rejoiced, there was a very small handful of people that couldn't find it in their hearts to feel happy. Not with Lily and James Potter dead.  
  
There was an even smaller group that felt worse. These people knew the whole story. These people were affected directly. These people had known Sirius Black.  
  
These people felt utterly deceived.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus walked slowly along the street, suddenly realizing he had no clue as to where he could find Dumbledore. He needed to speak with him – or anyone for that matter. Silence only brought him memories, and with the shock of everything happening all in one night, memories were almost as painful to accept as the news the morning had brought him.  
  
As Lily and James's smiling faces faded from his mind, he began to think about Sirius. It was unthinkable, incomprehensible, unbelievable... How could he do this?  
  
Remus had always known without a doubt how much Sirius cared for James. They were inseparable – like brothers, except they never fought. Remus had been defensive and somewhat hurt by Sirius's suspicions, but he'd always concluded it was just out of worry for James. He didn't like having to be the one in suspicion, but he'd continue to tell himself that Sirius had the right intentions.  
  
He'd never even begun to think that Sirius was only trying to take the attention off of himself.  
  
It was illogical, really. But, then again, perhaps that's what made it so brilliant.  
  
Part of him was perfectly content that Sirius was off to Azkaban. If anyone deserved such an awful place, he did. And yet, another part of him couldn't help but come to anger because he hadn't gotten to him first.  
  
Sirius, the spy. A murderer, a traitor. Clever, comical, annoyingly handsome... but foul and dark underneath it all. It was difficult to accept, but in the memory of Lily and James, Remus had no choice.  
  
It was useless – wandering aimlessly. But he found he couldn't bring himself to go home. Not with his family there. He'd have to keep on a happy face for their sakes, and right now, he couldn't. He couldn't possibly go home and let them see the way he was torturing himself.  
  
Now, more than ever, and for the first time in his life, Remus wished more than anything it could have been a full moon.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Rebecca sat, her hands shaking and no longer capable of holding the paper in her hands. Jamie seemed to have detected the gravity of whatever was troubling her mother, and she quieted her complaints of hunger and boredom and whatnot.  
  
It'd been hours since Remus had left, and she'd received only one letter since then. It was from Dumbledore. It must have been the same note sent to many, because the words had all been perfectly scripted, but her name hastily scribbled.  
  
The words ran through her head like a broken record, attached to it the familiar rumble and weariness of Dumbledore's voice when something was weighing on his mind.  
  
Harry is perfectly safe.  
  
Sirius Black will never harm anyone again.  
  
Lily and James Potter hadn't died without a cause.  
  
And the statement that struck her the most – whether we choose to remember him or not, utter the vile sound of his name, or remain silent forever... Voldemort has not left us.  
  
She wasn't sure what Dumbledore's tone might have been. What had he been thinking when he'd written that note? Perhaps he knew that none of this was an accident.  
  
But along with all the tearing emotions of misery, anger, irony, hopelessness, grief, and despair – she still felt something within her relax. Whatever had kept her blind for so long was gone... she could feel Dumbledore's mind in this letter.  
  
He was feeling just as much pain as anyone else. But not only for what had happened, but for what he knew was sure to come.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Opened books were scattered across an array of different tables Albus Dumbledore had conjured quickly. The sun was lowering, and Harry was surprisingly patient.  
  
Dumbledore smiled, thumbing through a few pages he'd researched before. "Only one thing left to do," he said soothingly, when Harry shifted.  
  
He pulled a chair up right in front of the boy, and he lowered himself slowly to the seat. Harry did not move an inch, and Dumbledore leaned in closer.  
  
The boy seemed to suddenly lack in attention span, as his round eyes traveled upwards to the vaulted ceiling. Dumbledore enforced the boy's gaze to meet his own with his weathered hands.  
  
Slowly, the old man's eyes closed. "Legilimens," he whispered.  
  
In a matter of seconds, after rushing images of green flashes and screams, Harry snapped back, clearly violated and upset. A distant wine issued from Harry's mouth, erupting into a wave of tears.  
  
Dumbledore frowned apologetically, though he'd gotten the information he'd needed. It seemed to him the story, or at least the last five minutes of it, had played out perfectly. It was a horrible thing for a child to live through, but the perfect circumstances for the protection he'd been researching the past year.  
  
It was an old spell, really – too old to be remembered or found credible – but effective nonetheless.  
  
And as the old wizard gazed into the young wizard's face – the face of any hero and every hero before doing what Dumbledore had been obligated to do in his life, he saw himself – and James at the same time. This boy would overthrow the murderer of his family... and not a thing could touch him while his mother's blood sheltered him. From now on, Lily's screams ran through his veins.  
  
Dumbledore raised his wand to complete the spell.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Remus didn't return until well after the sun had set, in hopes that Jamie had been sent to bed.  
  
When he Apparated into his house, however, he found this was not so.  
  
"Daddy!" Rebecca held Jamie back when she saw Remus stumble.  
  
"Remus," she breathed, taking a closer look. "Have you been drinking?"  
  
His eyes were hazy. "No," he drawled hastily.  
  
Rebecca exhaled slowly, frowning immensely. "You sure – I mean... Remus?"  
  
He seemed to come around again. He sent a meaningful look Jamie's way, looked back and repeated firmly, "No."  
  
Rebecca nodded miserably. "Jamie, honey, you go upstairs and I'll be up in a minute."  
  
Jamie looked to each of them, unsatisfied without an explanation, and reluctantly trudged up the stairs.  
  
"Are you – "  
  
"Yeah," he growled. He scratched his head. "I... I just – found myself drinking. And it..." He stopped. "I forgot it all after a while."  
  
Rebecca's eyebrows met.  
  
"Sorry... I was... it was the Three Broomsticks. And I... Rosie was there." His voice faltered, and his face contorted with grief.  
  
"Madam Rosmerta?"  
  
He nodded. "Rosie knew... she... James and I... and Sirius – we snuck there all the... I – she didn't charge me for them, so I didn't stop..."  
  
He swayed, but Rebecca held him by the shoulder. "You haven't done much drinking before, have you?"  
  
He was a mess, and he seemed to have difficulty pulling a sentence together – and Rebecca had a feeling it wasn't only because of the alcohol.  
  
"James made me once. I spat it in Peter's face." A feeble smile fluttered across his face, but fled when another entered his memory. "Sirius laughed so hard, he bought me another."  
  
Rebecca said nothing, only nodded. She wasn't sure when or how to stop him. Then again, maybe he needed this. He needed to cry – though she could tell he was fighting it.  
  
"I can't believe it," he said.  
  
"Wh – what Sirius did?"  
  
Remus answered with a scowl.  
  
"I can't, either."  
  
"It doesn't seem right."  
  
"It isn't right."  
  
"Nothing's right." His face was set like stone.  
  
"But Harry... he wasn't hurt. It may not be logical, but at least that's right."  
  
"He got what he'd dealt in the end, though, didn't he?" Remus spoke so softly, Rebecca had to lean in to hear.  
  
"Sirius or Voldemort?"  
  
"Both," he said in a near whisper.  
  
"I don't know, Remus. This isn't over. For either of them."  
  
"Oh, it's over for Sirius. With all the dementors breathing down his neck – the sheer memory of what he'd done'll kill him."  
  
Rebecca was unsure. "Something's not right. And not just what he did... it's more than that."  
  
Remus's eyes drooped – a clear sign that he wasn't paying attention. His eyes snapped open again.  
  
"Maybe you should sleep it off," Rebecca said, shaking off her uneasy feeling.  
  
Remus nodded distantly. Rebecca said something else, but the words must have faltered in his mind. The room was blurring, and fading to black.  
  
All he needed was a good rest. To sleep forever. And after forever had come and gone, then maybe he'd be able to bear another day in the empty place the world had become to him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Just to avoid any doubt of when the end is, I'll say it now. Chapter 43 will be the last one. I'm only guessing, but that's the best guess I can give. 


	39. The Other Side

In the weeks that followed the mysterious downfall of the Dark Lord, left and right, Death Eaters were being hauled into Azkaban. And just when the fortress isolated on the sea seemed to be nearing capacity, more and more kept showing up from the shadowy places of Britain.  
  
Lucius stood among the scattered faces of his partners in crime.  
  
"I've called you here... in the absence of our master." He swallowed.  
  
"Some have not shown, I see."  
  
The circle consisted of some fifteen people out of the original four hundred.  
  
Bellatrix Lestrange, along with her husband, Rodolphus, stood up zealously. "Where has our loyalty gone?" Bellatrix cried heatedly.  
  
"This is all that's left?" Rodolphus questioned angrily. "Avery, Karkaroff, Snape, Bagman? What do you think they're doing now?"  
  
"Pretending to celebrate with the rest of those fools, that's what I say!" called their youngest, Barty Crouch.  
  
Lucius smiled, satisfied. "And what will we do, now that the Dark Lord is not here to condemn them?"  
  
"You!" Bellatrix shrieked, pointing her finger at Lucius. "You, Mr. Malfoy... how could you blaspheme so blatantly?" She was shaking, and her eyes bulged madly, grotesquely distorting her obvious beauty.  
  
"Whatever do you – "  
  
"Our master has not left us!" Barty claimed loudly. "You, Mr. Malfoy, who claims to be the second in command, are only one of the skeptics!"  
  
"You accept him as dead, because that means you can take his place!"  
  
Lucius held up a hand. "Hold on a minute. I'm only considering the possibility." Barty shot Bellatrix and Rodolphus a knowing smirk. "All we need to do is investigate."  
  
"Surely, this is only a trick of Dumbledore's," offered Macnair.  
  
"Smokescreens and tricks of the hand," Antonin Dolohov said maliciously. "Muggle's magic."  
  
"No one could have killed the Dark Lord. They're hiding him."  
  
"But who would know?"  
  
"Isn't it obvious?"  
  
"We can't attack Dumbledore!"  
  
"Nonsense, you cowards! The gaffer's older than all of us combined."  
  
"No, you sorry lot, the second in command. Who d'you think he'd confide in if he had to?" The young Crouch's eyes were penetrating, and wildly fanatical.  
  
A breeze that swept through the Riddle house was the only answer.  
  
"Frank and Alice Longbottom," he said. "Members since 1971."  
  
Bellatrix's red lips curled. She'd grown to like this kid a lot. "The first," she said.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Snape couldn't stand the thought of James Potter dead. Despite the times he'd fantasized about the almighty braggart's downfall, he'd learn to accept his guilt as something everyone experienced with such murderous thoughts.  
  
He'd done good. In fact, in the end, he'd done all that he could without revealing himself, and others. But after all he'd done, the pride he'd surrendered, the way he'd risked himself for someone he hated so dearly – and what happens? He's killed, and once again, Severus Snape is the name everyone whispers behind their hands.  
  
And then there was Harry Potter. The saint. The miraculous boy wonder. The savior of wizardkind. The son of a quidditch legend. Who didn't know his name? He was sure to be famous just like his father, only worse.  
  
And Snape knew exactly what Dumbledore would ask of him. Why else would he keep him as Potions teacher when he so openly rejected the notion of him teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts? Snape was just another man at his post, patiently awaiting the day that Harry Potter would show his angelic face at Hogwarts so he could fulfill his duty in protecting the miracle of a child.  
  
It was revolting to think of, but he knew without a doubt that come another ten years, this would be the old man's politely demanding request.  
  
Snape continued his teaching, avoiding all of the students' childish questions, letting his bitterness grow – simmering like the bubbling cauldron before him – until it was all he could feel. He was numb to life, numb to love, numb to the compassion that had put him in this miserable position.  
  
Though, the students continued to assume the man had always been this way. They laughed behind their hands, subconsciously accepting it as common knowledge that Professor Snape felt no pain.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"You remember when Lily finally gave in to James? I never knew if she really meant it, or if it was just to shut him up. It was seventh year, wasn't it?"  
  
Remus didn't answer.  
  
"Try to think about it, Remus. How happy they were."  
  
"He wasn't as desperate then," Remus admitted reminiscently. "He gave up until Lily actually started to miss the poor nuisance."  
  
"She loved him, though."  
  
Remus seemed to look through the wall, watching his own memories. "He was ecstatic – like a boy at Christmas."  
  
"I heard he picked her up and carried her through the Gryffindor common room," Rebecca said.  
  
A ghost of a smile passed over his face. "And then he tripped over a chair, dropped her unceremoniously, and started swearing."  
  
Rebecca smiled. It was a start. "Sirius was actually impressed with the vocabulary he'd acquired."  
  
The thread that had held Remus's smile together snapped in an instant. "He always did swear too much."  
  
Rebecca, despite knowing how delicate the balance had become, decided to take it a step further – knowing she would regret it. "But that was just Sirius. He knew nobody minded."  
  
Sure enough, Remus's face cried betrayal. "You're defending him again."  
  
"Not at all," she said. "He just couldn't have been... you know... like that all his life. He was good once, wasn't he?"  
  
"I don't want to talk about it."  
  
"But Remus, that's what you have to do. When something happened to me, you'd make me talk. Whether I liked it or not, you made me confide in you."  
  
"This is different."  
  
"It is not, and you know it. I'm hurting, too, Remus. I need you for reassurance."  
  
Remus sighed. "I'm sorry."  
  
"Talk to me, Remus."  
  
"I'm sorry that I can't be who I've always been. If this is what you expect me to do – to talk calmly and rationally – then I beg you just to suspend belief for a moment and think that maybe I'm feeling worse than you could ever imagine."  
  
"But you're not."  
  
His head snapped up, incredulously irritated.  
  
"I can feel it, Remus. It's torture. Not what I feel, what you feel. You couldn't care less because you think you're only hurting yourself, but there're Seers in this house. And not just me."  
  
Remus blinked at her, his expression nearly vacant. "Then maybe I should leave."  
  
"No," was her immediate response.  
  
"Make up your mind, for God's sake. Do you want me around, or not?"  
  
"Of course," she stopped, noticing her hypocrisy. "I'm here for you. Just... don't push me away."  
  
Remus nodded his head, unsure that he could keep his promise. A warm feeling he hadn't felt for a while spread throughout him when he looked down to where Rebecca's robes were stretched over what would be his child.  
  
"Do we have a name yet for him?"  
  
"Her."  
  
"For her?"  
  
Rebecca bit her lip. "Actually, I do."  
  
"Well, then?"  
  
She glanced at Remus uncertainly. "I don't think you'll like it."  
  
"Try me."  
  
She pulled back the curtains to look at the night sky. "I don't think I like it, either."  
  
"Then why should we use it?"  
  
"Because... I saw myself, holding her, saying her name softly."  
  
"In a dream?"  
  
"In a vision."  
  
"Why do you feel you have to – "  
  
"Because. It's what I name her. It will be her name. I saw it."  
  
"So, if you hadn't seen this, you wouldn't be naming her accordingly?"  
  
Her eyes didn't leave the window. "That's right."  
  
"You don't have to bind yourself to fate."  
  
"You mean I should fight it? Change the future?"  
  
Remus caught himself before saying something foolish. He knew dealing with time and vision was dangerous. "No."  
  
"Then I must accept it."  
  
"If it wasn't your idea, then who decided for you?"  
  
Rebecca didn't answer.  
  
Remus dropped the subject, feeling it ran deeper than only names. "What'd you call her?" he asked softly. She sighed.  
  
Remus stepped forward to see what had caught her interest in the sky. The moon was shining overhead, rapidly waxing full. "What's the moon got to – "  
  
"I called her Luna."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~ 


	40. Justice

Reviewer Notes:  
  
NJ Nets Fan: Yeah, I thought I'd tie them together. Though, I wrote about it a year ago, and now I'm kind of stuck with her. Well, there she is.  
  
Nikki: I'm not to keen on the idea of having Luna in here and all, but I wrote about it in my first story (which was about a year ago now, so my views have changed quite a bit) So, I apologize if the storyline's a bit, well, unrealistic. I'm stuck with it, since this is, in fact, a sequel.  
  
Miss Piratess: Yes, Luna. I had the strongest urge to exclude her from the story, but I realized the whole Luna/Remus thing was written in stone... since I, erm, wrote it... not particularly in stone, but it's a well enough analogy to ff.net.  
  
GollumGal: Oh, come one, don't HATE him! He's a poor confused little fellow. He'll figure it out in 12 years or so.  
  
Kuutamo: I guess 'bastard undesirable piece of scum' just about sums him up nicely. And you better update.  
  
Prongs4: A lot can happen in 5 chapters. And look, another chapter! How'd that happen?  
  
Awkward: Awesomazing... hmmm... that's nice! I think I'll use that!  
  
This Parrot has Ceased to Be: I could ignore what I said in the summary, but then, what good would a summary be? Sorry to say, but I'll have to. But don't worry, I watched 'The Lorax' by Dr. Seuss in Biology today, so I think I'm ready to write a remotely happy ending to put a small band-aid on the enormously big tragedy that is bound to ensue. And I had a Shamrock Shake from McDonald's if that makes any difference.  
  
Meiko: No! That wasn't the end! No, go back. There.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was early May that Rebecca went into labor. Just as before, Remus was with her the whole way. He was only grateful it wasn't the full moon, or he'd have missed everything.  
  
But just when he'd first held his daughter in his arms, whom they'd obediently named Luna, he could have sworn he'd seen the full moon in her eyes.  
  
He smiled warily. Her eyes were beautiful, but at the same time haunting. No one else would ever understand that connection. The moon was his worst fear, and yet it was the aura that surrounded his own child.  
  
He looked back to see her eyes were closed. He was momentarily surprised that she'd fallen asleep. So innocent, defenseless, and completely trusting in him.  
  
It was only a question of whether Remus would let her down.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"As a faithful servant, you will not question your master's decision. I will have her taken care of."  
  
These, of course, were still nothing but words spoken in vain. Voldemort never did favors for his minions. Rebecca had been merely a pebble in his servant's shoe. And, like any master, he knew that a worker in discomfort worked harder.  
  
But now that he was gone (and Lucius still believed all this fanaticism among the Death Eaters was all rubbish) there was no danger in doing things himself.  
  
He was a free man again, and he had many friends in high places. His life was still in order, probably more so now that the Dark Lord wasn't controlling it.  
  
Aside from his wife and his heir, there was still one Malfoy left to be dealt with – and that was Jamie. Everyone knew that Mr. Lupin was a pureblood, but Lucius was the only one to have done his homework. There was a muggle somewhere back there in those lines. He was a half-blood, and he was raising Lucius Malfoy's daughter.  
  
They'd given her a muggle name. Jamie was still his, and he would keep her in his family. She was a Seer, after all. The Malfoy family could use a Seer.  
  
It was a pity she hadn't given him a son, or he might have acted sooner. But now that his life was uneventful, he needed something to go after. Narcissa had had complications when having Draco. She was barren.  
  
Lucius had always been taught that it was a shame for a family with such noble blood to produce only one heir. He'd invested himself in Jamie, and now she'd be raised to love filth.  
  
He stopped himself. He'd need to lay low for a while. With wild Death Eaters running around, all the important wizarding families would be on their guard for such an attack.  
  
It was only a matter of time.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Frank, did you hear something?"  
  
Frank Longbottom didn't even glance up from his paper. "Must be Neville. I gave him some Exploding Snaps."  
  
Alice sighed, looking in the other room. "I can see that."  
  
When her husband had immersed himself back into his reading, Alice spoke again. "Are you sure you didn't hear anything?"  
  
Neville tentatively reached out to touch one of the game pieces, which in turn exploded in his face. Neville started to cry.  
  
Frank sighed, putting his paper down. "Alice, I think we have enough noise to worry about." He got up from his place at the table, and went over to assuage his unhappy child.  
  
Alice walked over to the cage that held the family owl. She opened the latch, but frowned when the bird looked around her and hooted loudly.  
  
Alice turned around, and saw from where she stood, three figures advancing on Frank and Neville.  
  
"Frank!"  
  
One of the figures turned around, and swore. The other two sent curses into the next room, but none of them were green, to kill.  
  
"Find Dumbledore," she said to the owl, which took off in order to miss the spells sent its way. Another figure joined the one moving in on her, both with their wands out, and both laughing. One sounded like a woman.  
  
"What do you want?" she asked them, when she felt her back hit the corner of two walls.  
  
Both spoke their incantations simultaneously, but Alice wasn't dead when she opened her eyes. She couldn't move. She heard her husband shout.  
  
"What are you talking about?" he said, unable to keep his voice from rising.  
  
"The Dark Lord. Where are you keeping him?"  
  
The other Death Eater was twirling Frank's wand in his hand.  
  
Frank laughed. "Sorry to disappoint you, but he's dead." He glanced behind them and saw Neville poke his head out of the broom closet. Stay in there, son. Whatever you do.  
  
His answer had struck the two, judging by their hateful murmurings, like a direct blow.  
  
"Tell us."  
  
Alice was shaking. "We don't have him, I swear, he's dead. He's gone."  
  
"Tell us!" the woman shrieked.  
  
"Hush, dear. People like her are slow with this sort of thing. Think a little pain'll get the message across?"  
  
"Not particularly," Alice muttered.  
  
"Shut up, you!" The woman sent forth a spell that hit Alice square in the chest.  
  
Frank heard his wife screaming, and without thinking, he bound forward. He felt something strike a blow to his head, and he fell. He saw the broom closet shut tightly, and then he saw the floor.  
  
One of the men had their foot on his back. "Tell us now, and we'll easily tell our friends to let your wife go."  
  
"There's nothing to tell."  
  
"Crucio!"  
  
Alice felt herself hitting furniture, her hands were covering her head, her eyes were closed tightly to shut out the blinding white light. Knives were twisting inside her, all over her, her head hit the wooden floor, and she convulsed.  
  
Frank couldn't distinguish Alice's screams from his own. How long would it take for them to give up? He would surely die. He wanted to die. If only they would kill him right now, the pain would stop. The madness would stop. He didn't even notice when his voice grew hoarse. They were laughing.  
  
Just when the pain had nearly consumed their lives, a voice rang out above all the others, and the room stopped spinning.  
  
Frank opened his eyes, and saw men above him in ropes, and a tall, old wizard gently slapping his face.  
  
Alice got up from where she lay. A little boy opened a door. Alice wiped the tears from her eyes. The boy came forward towards her. Was he lost?  
  
"Frank can you hear me? Frank!" Dumbledore brought out his wand, but Frank answered.  
  
"Why can't I move?"  
  
"Don't worry. Alice is alright. Neville's alright."  
  
"Who are they? The ceiling's so white."  
  
"Frank?" Dumbledore knew he wouldn't joke like this.  
  
Frank sounded familiar. Maybe he'd met him once. He wanted to thank the old man, but suddenly forgot how to speak  
  
After laying for a while, and hearing the old man calling some woman's name, the man felt himself being levitated magically, thinking about how beautiful the name Alice sounded to him.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Dumbledore waited for the whole lot of them to arrive, but then it struck him that everyone was accounted for. Eight people. That was their Order.  
  
"I have celled you all here – Remus, Arabella, Sturgis, Dedalus, Alastor, Rubeus, Elphius, Minerva – to bring everything up to date."  
  
"What happened to Frank and Alice?" Sturgis asked.  
  
"They are currently in St. Mungo's... they wouldn't have been able to recognize any of you anyhow."  
  
"And Voldemort?" That had come from Hagrid.  
  
"I'm afraid... I'm afraid no one can kill him but young Harry, who has family in Surrey that has agreed to take him in."  
  
"Albus," McGonagall said softly. "You mean to tell us... he'll return?"  
  
"If that is what must happen for Harry to do what he must, then yes, Minerva.  
  
"I'm afraid there's no need for us to sit here as an organized force any longer. Despite our lacking numbers, we need no recruits. This Order has fallen. Thank you for your efforts."  
  
"But Dumbledore," Mrs. Figg protested. "Won't we need to help Harry when the time comes? If what you say is true, won't we meet again as the Order of the Phoenix?"  
  
Dumbledore smiled. "Yes. But don't say a word. The world can't know yet. They will accept it in due time, but while we have Harry to think of, let's not inspire panic around him."  
  
Alastor, who sported a bandage over his nose (compliments of Evan Rosier, whom the ministry had executed unmercifully), smiled grimly. "I think it's safe to say, Albus, that you hadn't named this organization merely on a whim."  
  
Dumbledore smiled. "Indeed, I did have the future in mind. It was likely time would require of us a rebirth from our ashes." A whimsical smile once again played upon the old man's face.  
  
"And I must say, Fawkes was very pleased."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sirius found it difficult to count the days in his mind, for his mind was no longer solid ground with such dreadful feelings inspired by the awful creatures that guarded the door to his cell.  
  
At first, he'd been flattered to find he had maximum security. He tried to keep humor in his mind, sarcastic to a degree, lest he find himself just as miserable and empty as the prisoners around him.  
  
The tally he kept on the wall showed that it'd been forty days. Sirius wasn't familiar with any of the stories of the Bible, but he knew enough to know that forty was a recurring number. Maybe if he was a hairy man in the desert, or some bloke in a boat with snakes and gorillas, it'd mean something.  
  
Would he be here all his life with nothing to do but rehash his mistakes and talk to himself for company? Would he go mad? He remembered the stories people had told him about Azkaban long ago. They'd always say something to the extent of losing your mind in a month, but as far as he could tell, he was still perfectly sane. Granted, it was hell, this place – but he was surviving so far.  
  
Just when he was wondering faintly if it was a Thursday, a dementor glided past his cell, dragging behind him a young boy. The boy glanced at Sirius for an instant, and looked away with tears in his eyes. For a moment, Sirius thought it was a woman. But who knows what was wrong with the boy, the lighting was horrible in this place. He was whispering something over and over under his breath, and if Sirius had been closer, he would have heard that he was saying, "Barty".  
  
Another dementor passed, with a man following. The man grinned wickedly.  
  
Two figures followed behind, both chained, and one of them dreadfully familiar.  
  
"Be proud, cousin," Bellatrix called. Sirius gritted his teeth.  
  
If it hadn't entirely been hell before – it was now. Just without the fire and brimstone.  
  
Sirius picked up the rock he'd discarded earlier, and finding an empty space on his wall, he began his story. Everything – he poured out everything. He knew no one else would read it, for this was where he'd reside his whole life. The simple knowledge and confession that he was blameless – maybe not guiltless, but blameless – was what would keep him from losing who he was, if ever there was a day that he forgot he'd been an innocent man once.  
  
~~  
  
Okay, so I lied. 44's the last chapter. 


	41. Time in Passing

Awkward: Quite a story, huh? The only characters a writer can use to lighten the story are either killed or imprisoned. And Remus isn't really the one to joke. So, yes, it's hard. I had to laugh when you said I had great control. My first intentions were only to mention James and Sirius and Peter every once in a while when it seemed necessary. Then it became that thirty or so chapters from their point of view seemed necessary. I really couldn't control myself. Once again, I think I wrote too much. On with the chapter, then.  
  
This Parrot has ceased to Be: I don't recommend it, really. I would before, but it's not very well written. It would explain why I don't kill Jamie (did I spoil that?), and what happens to her, etc, etc, but you don't have to.  
  
Prongs4: Yeah, it's Luna Lovegood. She played a role in Jamie's story, and this is sort of where the mystery is solved. At least for those who read the story.  
  
Nikki: Yeah, Rebecca dies, but not Jamie. The only reason Jamie's in here is because she's the main character in my first story (which I don't recommend reading because it's nearly a year old now and not very well written).  
  
GollumGal: Oh no. Hmmmm... Lupin won't know about Sirius because in book 3 he still isn't sure (until he finds Pettigrew, that is). But I will have a certain someone hint at it at the very very end. Please, oh please oh please don't hate me.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Since losing everyone around him, it'd been increasingly difficult to harness himself.  
  
Remus waited, looked back at his house, decided he was too close, and began to walk further through the trees until he could see nothing but the woods around him. He was lost – and he desperately hoped that's how it would stay.  
  
He fiddled with the edge of the sleeve of his cloak. He knew he would most likely destroy his clothes after transforming. He'd never minded before, but this was one of his last. Sure, the Lupins had been fairly wealthy, but they'd also been dead for four years. And with his condition, Remus found it hard to find any paid work to keep things going.  
  
And with one child, and another on the way, he wouldn't have any room for wasting a thing.  
  
The wind blew like harsh ice, Remus shivered violently, and immediately decided against it. Either he woke in the morning with torn robes, or he woke in the morning near frozen to death.  
  
Hesitantly, he approached a strong-rooted tree, and brought out a long cord of rope. He was shaking now. His hands were too cold to tie the knots.  
  
He brought out his wand, and bound himself to the tree as tightly as possible. His hand limp in it's place on the tree, he dropped his wand to the ground.  
  
His arms were open, as if beckoning the wolf to posses him.  
  
The moon rose, and before he could properly contemplate it's beauty, he lost awareness of the world around him.  
  
The moonlight struck him, subtly at first like a thousand needles moving across his skin, then twisting inside as his bones reconfigured.  
  
The pain wrenched him from his upright position, and the thick ropes cut into his skin. His mind told him to scream, but all that issued from his mouth was an infuriated howl.  
  
His heart abandoned its customary rhythm – bringing forth a faster, wilder beat... the beat of war drums. The heartbeat of a hunter.  
  
Someone had bound him here on purpose... to starve him. He snarled, and turned his head towards the ropes that held him.  
  
The floodgates of rage were opened, and the wolf could still sense the pain of the man. Whatever thoughts Remus had kept inside of him – all the pent up feelings – were here to be spent on this wretched wolf's violent struggle to free himself and tear the world to pieces.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Where's Father, Mum?"  
  
Rebecca smiled. Jamie sounded far too eloquent for a two year old in muggle standards, only proving she had to have some magical ability. The body grew twice as fast, so the child had time enough for their magic to develop as well.  
  
Rebecca stopped smiling, letting the question register in her mind. "He's..." She hesitated, resorting to simple honesty. "He's in the forest, dear."  
  
Jamie giggled. "Why's he in there?"  
  
Rebecca suddenly concluded a bit of story-telling wouldn't hurt. "He's out... saving someone. Someone defenseless."  
  
"Do they live in the woods?"  
  
"They come and go."  
  
"What's he saving them from?"  
  
Torture was too strong a word for her, but it was all that fit. "A monster," she said.  
  
Jamie grew excited. "What kind of monster?"  
  
Rebecca hushed Jamie because Luna was sleeping. But in her mind it was because she didn't have an answer Jamie would understand.  
  
Jamie lowered her voice obediently. "He's fighting it right now?"  
  
Rebecca twisted the wedding band that she bore on her left hand. Her eyes searched the ceiling for nothing in particular.  
  
"Yeah. He's fighting his monster."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Weeks passed and things got no better. Weeks then rolled into months and what was no better grew worse.  
  
Money had become tight – too tight. It seemed the roof over their head and the clothes on their backs was all they had left of the living Remus Lupin's parents had made.  
  
Remus was downtrodden, defeated, desparate – but Rebecca seemed impervious... even cheerful.  
  
She smiled at him. "Things'll get better," she'd say.  
  
If things were getting better, Remus couldn't see it.  
  
Luna was walking after a few months; a sure sign she was a witch. On the other hand, the talking would need some working on. She was still babbling nonsense, but Remus had to admit it was cute.  
  
He had received a letter from Dumbledore basically listing what the Order had recovered from Godric's Hollow – for whoever it may have held value to to come forward and claim what was left. Remus faintly wondered why Dumbledore had waited so long to tell him while his eyes scanned the list.  
  
They were small things – a chair here, a book there. But there was something at the bottom of the list that caught his interest. A mirror. A small, charmed mirror.  
  
~  
  
"McGonagall must've thought I was talking to myself."  
  
"Flitwick was oblivious. I used a muffling charm."  
  
"No wonder I could barely hear you," James had muttered.  
  
Remus recalled raising his head irritably. "What's this noise about?"  
  
"McGonagall thought she could split us up by giving us separate detentions."  
  
Sirius had stood proudly in light of his brilliant plan. "But we thought differently."  
  
"Nobody separates Sirius Black and James Potter."  
  
Remus could remember rolling his eyes. "I should have known."  
  
~  
  
He shook off the memory. That mirror might have held some value to James – or even Sirius for his own twisted reasons – but it certainly did Remus no good.  
  
Where the other mirror was, he didn't know. He assumed it was with Sirius... but Sirius was gone. Maybe it was still with the rest of his things at the flat – assuming he still had the flat.  
  
Perhaps he'd sold it right before in preparation for running. Or maybe he'd planned on killing everyone who could testify of his guilt so there'd be no need to.  
  
What had he been planning? When he came down to the bare basics of this plan of dear Padfoot's, Remus found it wasn't as morbidly brilliant as it had seemed. It was rather rash, as if prepared in a hurry.  
  
Remus laughed dryly. It was exactly the kind of thing Sirius would come up with.  
  
Numbly, he threw the letter in the fire, with no intention of replying.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Lucius sat amidst an air of superiority. The chair he had positioned himself in was high backed, elegant, and somewhat exalting.  
  
He waited patiently until the doors had been closed, and the lights turned off upstairs. Then he smiled.  
  
Everything he could ask for was before him – money, family, and a shameful yet prideful corrupt popularity among those high in office. But one thing was not within his grasp – the satisfaction of completion. Lucius Malfoy was a man that always carried out his plans.  
  
And his plans were murderous. He concluded Jamie didn't matter anymore – it was too late. They'd already impressed upon her their disgusting tolerance of the filth around them. Whether out of vengeance, fear of prosecution, or just sheer annoyance, Lucius planned on ridding his life completely of Rebecca's presence.  
  
And, he thought, what better day than the day of the full moon?  
  
~~~~~~~~~~ 


	42. By the Fate of the Moon

Chapter Forty-Two: By the Fate of the Moon  
  
Apparently it's a big chapter for it to be bearing the story's namesake.  
  
Disclaimer: The whole notion of giving weapons made of a variety of different woods to hormonal British teenagers was not my idea. It's the rich lady with the infamous initials... JKR...  
  
~~  
  
With all the burdens, issues, dilemmas, pressing matters, and worries that continued threatening to drag Remus down into a pit of stress and despair, there was one solitary beacon of light that helped him to stumble on through the obstacles that had settled themselves around him. That prospect was teaching.  
  
With the Order scattered, and his life restored to his own bidding, Remus finally had his chance to teach. With Frank Longbottom... unfortunately indisposed, there was a teaching job open at Hogwarts for Defense Against the Dark Arts. And who else would he find that he could trust to tolerate his condition but the one man who'd gone completely out of his way to make his life easier all through his childhood?  
  
Rebecca watched the day play before her in a haze. Every movement, every turn of her head, every gesture of her hand, seemed to slow down, pronounced dramatically.  
  
But when Remus stepped into the room all buttons hit full play, and her day had begun.  
  
"Where are you going?" she asked distantly, but with a smiling voice all the same. She heard his words echo before he'd spoken them.  
  
"The school. I'm going to see if I can get that teaching job."  
  
Rebecca's mind stalled for a moment. "Alright," came her involuntary answer, as she planted a brief kiss on his lips.  
  
Something was telling her, or rather screaming at her behind thick walls, to get Jamie out. Subconsciously, she acquiesced as if it had been her idea all along. "Do you think you could take Jamie?"  
  
Jamie gazed happily at her mother and leapt in the air triumphantly.  
  
"I think she should be properly introduced to the castle."  
  
Jamie's face acquired a look of awe and incomprehension. "I'm going to school at a castle?"  
  
"Yes, but it will quite a few years before that happens."  
  
The conversation continued with idle chat, promises to say hello to various people and casual goodbyes.  
  
It wasn't until Remus had left with Jamie sitting on his shoulders that the present caught up with her with a striking blow. She doubled over, caught her balance on a small table, and regained her stature in a daze.  
  
Something within her was uneasy, fluttering with panic, and she found she couldn't stand still.  
  
Luckily, Luna's whining distress call broke her from her discomforting reverie.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
It was a little after sunset when Remus had arrived at Hogwarts, but it seemed much earlier. Remus was uncommonly alert, and his blinking eyes hadn't even begun to slow like they did when the light left the sky. Tonight, his vision seemed perfectly accustomed to the dark shadows of the evening and the lack of contrast between the fading colors around him.  
  
Jamie was a bouncing ball of crackling fire next to him. She bubbled with questions, and made excited noises as they turned each corner. Every intake of breath seemed to give Remus the impression she was a bomb just waiting to explode with the enormity and beauty of what her eyes were taking in.  
  
As they approached the tall statue that guarded the way to Dumbledore's office, Remus found his old Headmaster already outside, waiting for them.  
  
Remus raised his eyebrows quizzically.  
  
"I came out to let you in," Dumbledore explained. "Surely you didn't think I'd done away with using passwords anymore?"  
  
Remus shook his head, and gave Jamie a small nudge in the back to go ahead of him. She did so tentatively, and Remus patiently followed.  
  
The room was... indescribable. The only word that came to mind that could wrap together the towering bookshelves, elaborately carved archways of stone, innumerable devices, meticulous devotion to details was simply... awe- inspiring.  
  
Jamie was struck dumb, accepting it as a beauty without words.  
  
It was a vaguely familiar sight – he'd been inside a few times before, perhaps not as often as James or Sirius (Remus shivered) but it still managed to amaze him each time.  
  
"I, er, wanted to – "  
  
"The teaching job, yes," Dumbledore interrupted.  
  
Jamie sat obediently next to Remus, her feet barely emerging over the end of the seat.  
  
"I thought I'd bring her along, I hope it doesn't – "  
  
Dumbledore waved his hand in the air. "No, no, it's fine. I suppose I see enough children in the day they couldn't possibly bother me any other time." He winked at Jamie, who smiled faintly.  
  
"I suppose an interview is in order."  
  
Remus frowned. "You know well enough about my dealings, Professor. You've occupied my house with various Aurors for the past three years."  
  
"A house which I note has been taken off the Floo Network."  
  
"We were only being cautious," Remus explained uneasily at the whimsical grin Dumbledore shot his way.  
  
"Nevertheless, one can't be too cautious. We'll merely acknowledge your academic accomplishments, which I must say definitely qualify you."  
  
"Academic accomplishments?"  
  
"Twelve OWLS, top student in your Defense Against the Dark Arts class, Prefect for three years, and not to mention a mysterious affinity and devotion to your lessons in Care of Magical Creatures."  
  
"Oh," Remus answered, scratching behind his ear in humility.  
  
Dumbledore smiled fondly. "There isn't much more I can say on the matter but that – " Dumbledore stopped, and his face fell as his gaze shifted to Remus's right.  
  
Remus followed the Headmaster's gaze, and found Jamie sitting perfectly still (a rare thing for the girl), her eyes wide and brimming with tears of confusion.  
  
"What is it?" he asked her.  
  
She didn't answer right away. After a few minutes of what seemed painful to her, the word came out. "Mum."  
  
"What about her?" Remus asked, thoroughly puzzled.  
  
But Dumbledore seemed to understand better than Remus did, for he asked a simpler and yet infinitely odd question. "What do you see?"  
  
Her mouth contorted, and her eyes shot back and forth reading an image that seemed to be moving somewhere far off. "Daddy."  
  
"I'm here," Remus breathed.  
  
Jamie shook her head slowly and with a mature gravity uncharacteristic of any child her age. "Father," came the alien word.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The piercing crack of Apparation sounded through her otherwise silent home, but she reacted slowly, if not at all. She'd felt it coming towards her, so she couldn't with all honesty act surprised when she found Lucius Malfoy in her presence once again.  
  
Luna was safe upstairs, and still sleeping. Perhaps if it stayed that way nothing would happen to her.  
  
"Mr. Malfoy," she greeted him cordially.  
  
He seemed taken aback. His wand was out already, and she wasn't screaming or begging or pleading or anything. Just as he'd finished his thought he noticed with satisfaction that her lower lip was quivering.  
  
"Wh – what do you want?"  
  
Lucius rolled his eyes, summoning her own wand and pocketing it. "Can't you recognize an unfriendly visit when you see it?"  
  
"Are you going to kill me?" she asked him, feeling her back meet the wall behind her. She was cornered and unarmed.  
  
"Perhaps. It's what I was planning, but I presume maybe if you try hard enough to convince me, I'll do otherwise and be on my way."  
  
"Remus will be home any minute." She began sliding sideways along the wall, but he followed every step like a predator. "You should have considered the fact that I have a husband to – " She swallowed loudly when Lucius leaned into the wall, his arm near her stiffening shoulder. "– to protect me."  
  
Lucius sighed casually. "I must admit the idea of an unrestrained werewolf frightens me, but the question is... does the werewolf know I'm here?"  
  
"He's no werewolf, he's a... a wizard. And more of a man than you."  
  
"Not according to the sky above, he isn't."  
  
"What?"  
  
He didn't elaborate. "Thought you'd gotten rid of me, did you?"  
  
She clenched her fists, and thought fleetingly of muggle violence.  
  
"You thought that since you hadn't heard from me for months, even years, that I'd forgotten the idiot you'd made out of me?"  
  
"You'd had the characteristic all along, Lucius," she muttered warily. He'd been right. Her mouth was always what got her in trouble. "I merely brought out the best in you."  
  
His wand was upon her in an instant, and he yelled the first spell that came to mind. This one happened to be the worst, in his opinion.  
  
Her mouth opened, and her body began to shake. Finally, her mouth issued screams... genuine cries of pain that Lucius found refreshing.  
  
With whatever sense she had left in her without the Cruciatus Curse dominating the rest of her consciousness, she slammed her full body weight against his, and – caught off guard – he fell to the ground, his wand leaving his hands.  
  
Rebecca pushed herself up, scrambling around for his wand, but was stopped by his fist connecting with the side of her head. Lights exploded in front of her eyes, and she was faintly aware of movement around her.  
  
When the room came back into view, she screamed, for she found a murderous face before her far beyond the cold, sarcastic expression she'd grown accustomed to.  
  
He yelled something about blood – his blood – but the words slipped past her as panic took over.  
  
"I have no use for you anymore."  
  
Then the world shifted, and Rebecca knew without a doubt that her body was lifeless.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What's happening? Is she alright?"  
  
Jamie wouldn't answer. She buried her face into his robes.  
  
Dumbledore spoke unexpectedly. "No. She's..." He lost his insight when Jamie looked away.  
  
"Keep her here," Remus said hastily, and closed his eyes, willing himself to leave. But he didn't. This was Hogwarts, and he couldn't Apparate.  
  
He looked to the fireplace on the other end of the room, but it was no use. His home wasn't connected to the Floo Network. He swore softly, running from the room.  
  
He'd have to run all the way to Hogsmeade, being the closest place beyond the grounds. He felt his feet skipping steps, taking the stairs three at a time.  
  
But just as he'd emerged from the castle, his body stiffened. The sun was gone from the sky, but light remained. The moon was shining down on him – full, as far as he could tell.  
  
His suspicions were confirmed when he felt his skin prickling. He ran as hard as he could to distance himself from the children. His bones were on fire. He tripped a few times, and the last time he found that when he'd gotten back up, his hands were pulling at the earth to keep him going as well as his feet. He was on all fours.  
  
By the time he'd reached his destination, his face was wet with tears of frustration, and he was no longer himself.  
  
Something wasn't right, something wasn't fair, something was bringing his world down, tearing it to pieces. He felt like weeping, and yet another side of him had never wept before – he only knew howling.  
  
He didn't quite understand. He was only an animal. A mistreated animal kept at bay the majority of his life. He was free now, and some instinct was telling him to kill.  
  
The same human instinct that told him to weep was the very animal instinct that told him to kill.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
AN: Two more chapters. I'll put in some happiness, don't worry. And maybe even a Weasley. So don't yell incoherent obscenities at me. 


	43. The Beast

Chapter Forty-Three: The Beast  
  
~~  
  
Sunlight filtered through the trees and onto Remus Lupin's face, turning the darkness of his eyelids to a crimson red. He shifted his body, and after a fresh wave of pain overtook him, he quickly decided not to move again.  
  
He opened his eyes. He must be somewhere behind Hogsmeade. Perhaps on the outskirts of the Forbidden Forest. He felt dry leaves rub against raw, bleeding skin. He lifted his hands and saw without surprise that they were covered with blood.  
  
More scars to add to the rest of them, he thought. Then he remembered why there was blood on his hands.  
  
He turned his head and retched. It wasn't his blood.  
  
He gritted his teeth and steeled himself for sitting upright. It was excruciating, but at least he could see the full damage that had been done.  
  
His lips felt dry and cracking, and he slowly passed his tongue along them. For whatever reason, there was dried blood all along his mouth.  
  
He shuddered. His eyes were wide, his breathing was irregular and panicked, and he was shaking. It hurt, oh it hurt, but involuntarily he shook nonetheless.  
  
There was blood in his mouth. He retched again. He was dizzy, and voices were approaching. Familiar voices. A man's, a woman's. They were pleasant voices that reminded him of full moons during his school days, but he was either too tired or too sick with disgust to clearly identify them.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
The next time he opened his eyes, he felt clean robes on him and a soft bed beneath him. The ceiling was high and familiar, and the room smelled of fresh potions and clean sheets.  
  
"What happened to you, sir?"  
  
Remus turned his head. A boy, no more than thirteen with red hair and a few scattered freckles was gazing at him. Remus faintly wondered if his face was still as bloody as it'd been before, but he decided it wasn't – for the boy was merely curious rather than disgusted.  
  
"You look all torn up. Were you attacked?"  
  
"Who are you?" Remus asked, suddenly noticing with dismay how hoarse his voice sounded.  
  
The boy puffed out his chest. "I'm the new chaser for Gryffindor."  
  
The boy vaguely reminded him of James. "Gryffindor, eh? That's me as well."  
  
The boy raised an eyebrow.  
  
"It was, anyways. So what are you in here for? Besides to ask questions."  
  
The boy grinned. "I could ask the same of you. In fact I have, already. Alright, if you must know – Quidditch injuries. Ravenclaw's got tough beaters."  
  
"I bet," Remus said quietly. The boy waited expectantly for an answer, and Remus sighed. "I was, er, attacked."  
  
"By who?"  
  
"A werewolf."  
  
The boy's mouth dropped. "I heard about that, I did. From Bill's – my brother's Daily Prophet."  
  
Remus caught his breath. "Go on," he said stiffly.  
  
"They said there was an attack on Hogsmeade. Four people dead. Two of 'em were hiking muggles. Can't quite remember their names... but there's a big investigation an' everything."  
  
Madam Pomfrey had arrived just in time to stop the increasingly unpleasant conversation.  
  
"Oh, Mr. Weasley, if you're well enough to interrogate my patients, you're well enough to go to class."  
  
The boy swore softly under his breath, and left the wing feigning a limp.  
  
Madame Pomfrey fussed about him, feeding him some unidentifiable potions that he'd had so many times, the taste had dulled over the years.  
  
"Madame Pomf – "  
  
"Oh heavens, dear. You've been out of school for three years now. My name's Poppy, Mr. Lupin."  
  
"And my name's Remus," he answered dryly. Poppy smiled.  
  
"What is it dear?"  
  
"Was that me who – "  
  
"Hush."  
  
"But was it – "  
  
"We both know you wouldn't do a thing like that on purpose."  
  
"So I did kill all those people."  
  
Poppy sighed. "Remus... Mr. Lupin..." She seemed to be at a loss for words. Finally, she muttered an "I'll get Albus".  
  
Remus found it insulting that she needed Dumbledore in order to assuage this shameful recollection of murder that was beginning to grow within him, but then he realized he'd have trouble saying anything if he were in her position.  
  
Did this make him a criminal? Was he up there with Sirius Black and Voldemort?  
  
"Remus Lupin," came Dumbledore's booming greeting. He was stern and somewhat angry, which, even to a small degree, was frightening.  
  
"What's this talk of murder I hear?"  
  
"I did it, Professor."  
  
"You most certainly did not. This could have happened to anyone. We'll be more cautious next time."  
  
"But, Professor. I took innocent lives! I should be punished, thrown in jail, something!"  
  
"Are you volunteering to join all those you've fought against?"  
  
"Dumbledore, please. Someone has to pay."  
  
"Yes. Someone must pay. But that someone is hidden within you, and will not ever come out fully. I couldn't sacrifice you in order to satisfy justice. That would ruin the whole purpose of avenging innocent lives."  
  
"But I'm not innocent, Dumbledore."  
  
"Ah, but no one is. Be that as it may, you are more spotless than even I am, for I have killed by my own free will."  
  
Remus fell silent. "I could have hurt the children."  
  
"But you didn't. So leave it there. You've done good. Now they're actually encouraged to follow the rules more closely and stay inside after hours."  
  
Remus caught the humor, but didn't find it funny at all. "Where's Jamie?"  
  
"Staying with the Ravenclaws. There was an extra bed in their tower."  
  
"And Luna?"  
  
"I found her unscathed and the Lovegoods have volunteered to take care of her while you recover."  
  
"Unscathed? She wasn't – it's not – she's not..."  
  
"Rebecca is dead."  
  
"It was Lucius," Remus declared without hesitation.  
  
"It was also Lucius who fed the Ministry the information that she was attacked by the same werewolf that attacked Hogsmeade."  
  
Remus choked, and seethed.  
  
"It's all too much," he said quietly. "Everyone I ever loved. I loved James. I loved Lily. I loved Peter. Hell, I even loved Sirius back when I knew him."  
  
Dumbledore peered at him over his glasses.  
  
"The world's become a terrible place, with all its beasts and monsters. And to think... I'm one of them."  
  
"Remus."  
  
"No. Some family is weeping and falling apart because someone near to them's dead. And here I am... ready to cry like a little child." He bit his lip roughly to keep it still.  
  
"Jamie's waiting for you. Don't confuse her."  
  
"Jamie," he breathed. "No, Professor. Do me a favor, will you?"  
  
Albus wasn't sure he was going to like the favor much.  
  
"Give her the... the strongest memory charm you can... you can come up with."  
  
"I will not."  
  
"If you don't, then I will. She's just like her mother. Even if she's too young to remember, she'll see it nonetheless. Her Eye will show her what she wants to know, and she'll be curious about me. Block it."  
  
"You'll be taking care of your children," Dumbledore said quietly and profoundly.  
  
"But I can't. I'll kill them in the end, I know it. Who'll watch them when I transform? What happens when I have to tell them? What kind of a father would that be? One who attacks himself in absence of proper prey..."  
  
For once, Dumbledore looked anxious and worried.  
  
"You know I'm making a whole a lot of sense, don't you? That's why you won't stop me. I'm making too much sense. The truth hurts, doesn't it?" Remus's stopped himself, but too late. "The truth is what I've had to live with," he finished, muttering.  
  
Dumbledore gave him a silencing glare. Remus shut his mouth, suddenly embarrassed.  
  
"I'll agree. But for now only. The Lovegoods will keep Luna and I'll keep Jamie here. But only for you to regain your right mind. This is not the same man this staff has grown to know and tolerate and even love. You're in no state to raise them, but you will be."  
  
Remus muttered something inaudible.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Without any further thought, Remus sold the house. He needed the money, and he needed to leave the town he'd grown up in. He needed more hustle and bustle to occupy his tortured mind.  
  
He returned to London, and with barely enough money to get by, he found he could afford no less than what came free. There was one place left, one place that wouldn't cost him anything, for it belonged to nobody, but it would take mental strength and a strong will to endure the memories.  
  
By the end of September, Remus had settled himself in the small, untidied flat once owned by Sirius Black.  
  
After elaborate plans of hiding his tracks and disguising himself whenever he went out (which was rare if not close to never), Remus Lupin eventually disappeared off the face of the earth, so it seemed to the untrained eye.  
  
He'd settled down quite uncomfortably, finding himself more miserable by the day. But perhaps that's what kept him going. For he knew, without a doubt, he wouldn't have been able to survive in a happy environment, among people who lived their lives as if nothing of huge importance had happened to anyone in the world.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
NO! Come back! One more chapter, I swear. And, alas, there will be happiness to some small degree. 


	44. A Gentle Haunting

Alright, so maybe Remus was a bit too... openly angry. I got carried away last chapter. Well, when I try happy after a death, it turns out sappy... and chances are it is. Dreadfully sorry.  
  
Um... what was I gonna say... oh yes, reviews!  
  
Awkward: Yay for TKAM! Yay for 9th grade English homework! Yay for Scout for being all cute and stuff! Okay, I'm sorry I couldn't make it happy. Charlie was pretty much the highlight, and that was it. I suck at happy endings, this is the best I could do.  
  
Nikki: Unpredictable... hmmm... I suppose that's a good thing. Thanks for sticking with this story, even when it got boring. Don't deny it, you know it was at one point!  
  
Kuutamo: thanks so much! And yes, sometimes one word is more than enough.  
  
Cessate133: Nope. Jamie and Luna are oblivious. Well, except for Jamie... but that's later on, and already written, and oh so very badly written.  
  
This Parrot has ceased to be: I guess the summary did sound a little too ominous. Glad you liked it... to a degree, I'm sure.  
  
GollumGal: For your sake, I mentioned Sirius in this chapter. But only a little.  
  
Miss Piratess: NO! Not the infamous strange furry animal! Well, if I made Remus kill Lucius, it would ruin the story for others, so I'll do it just for you: Remus decided it was about time he set things straight. Lucius eyed him like a hawk, his wand out before him. With little thought, Remus made a strange screeching sound akin to a dying cat, and Lucius stared incredulously. Then he waved his wand, said his incantation, and Lucius fell over dead. Remus jumped in the air triumphantly. "Yay! Go me!"  
  
~~  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
~~  
  
Judging by the fact that the moon had sunk low enough that he couldn't see the shadows of the trees on the walls, Remus could tell it was far past midnight. It seemed as if it had been only a few minutes since the sun had set, and Remus had opened the first bottle.  
  
He held his hand in front of him. His mind was dizzied by the crimson blurred movement. The empty bottles lay in front of him, one shattered, and a vague question entered his mind once again.  
  
Was the pain gone, yet?  
  
Something from the distance was calling him, a drunken, sorrowful man. It was his own weariness... calling him home. Calling him to sleep. The wind was singing softly, and his hand relaxed on the bottle he was holding.  
  
He hadn't slept in days for the fear of what his dreams may reveal. He didn't want to remember what he'd done. But the harder he struggled against it, the heavier his eyes became. The sky was dark, and he was falling...  
  
His vision went black before his eyes had closed.  
  
After an eternity that passed like nothing at all, and amidst the unfathomable opaqueness the air was around him, Remus found himself waking in his own mind... in someone's soft arms.  
  
"Where am I?"  
  
"Hush," she whispered softly.  
  
In an instant, his heart cried painfully. "Rebecca?"  
  
She didn't answer, but ran a hand through his hair.  
  
"Are you – is this real?"  
  
"No, Remus. You're drunk."  
  
But Remus didn't have the strength to laugh. "It's you, though."  
  
"Yeah."  
  
He mouthed wordlessly, grasping at loose ends as his thoughts raced. Something was right once again. And yet, he knew he'd wake to find nothing.  
  
"I – I – why?" was all that escaped his mouth.  
  
"Don't ask me. It wasn't my choice."  
  
"You knew?"  
  
"That all this would happen? Yes."  
  
"And you never told me?"  
  
"And have you live like this? In misery? In fear?"  
  
"It hasn't changed since I was a child."  
  
"But you were happy, once."  
  
"Never again," he sighed.  
  
"I wouldn't be too sure."  
  
"I trusted everyone too much. I can't do that again." He seemed impervious to her smug humor.  
  
"Remus, the problem with you is you love to be liked. You're too pleased to find anyone who would even tolerate your condition to care who they are. People don't hate you."  
  
He laughed bitterly. "Sure seems like it."  
  
"You're a wonderful man, you know."  
  
"And lonely. You were the last."  
  
"But Jamie? Luna?"  
  
Remus hesitated. "It's better I don't hurt them."  
  
She stopped, and stood. Remus stood as well.  
  
"Well, that was your choice." She looked crestfallen, but Remus was unbendable in his decision.  
  
"Why'd you leave me?" he breathed.  
  
"It wasn't my place to stay. I'd done what I had to."  
  
"And what might that be?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
"So... you were meant to die... but I just happened to fall madly in love with you along the way?"  
  
Rebecca smiled. "Does it seem coincidence to you?"  
  
"No."  
  
"Luna's no coincidence. She has a part to play yet."  
  
"Then why am I still here?"  
  
"To teach," was her simple reply.  
  
"I tried... it kept me from you."  
  
"Not now. Just wait. You'll be needed more than you know."  
  
"Will I be getting any straight answers from you?"  
  
She grinned. "Maybe."  
  
He shook his head dejectedly. "A good solid no would do."  
  
She looked so patient, so wise, so young... in deep contrast to the sleep- deprived, unshaven, slurring man before her.  
  
"You look awful," Rebecca said frankly.  
  
"Thank you," came the sarcastic reply.  
  
"If you would only care about things... like you used to. Before you know it, people will be looking up to you. Looking for guidance. What will you say to them, then?"  
  
"I don't know."  
  
Rebecca shook her head. "There are people worse off than you. In lower places, lower spirits. Hated, condemned to a life of torture. How will you be of any comfort to them when you're like this?"  
  
"Who?"  
  
"I shouldn't say."  
  
"Who?"  
  
Rebecca averted her eyes. "There're many it could apply to."  
  
"Name one."  
  
She searched the air around her for an answer. "Harry," she said distantly, though, in her heart she meant Sirius Black.  
  
"That won't be for years."  
  
"But you'll be ready, won't you?"  
  
He sighed.  
  
"You'll be calm, composed, even-tempered, wise..."  
  
"I'm not all of that."  
  
"Sure you are. It's been a while."  
  
"All the same. I won't be happy."  
  
"You will. Forget your pain, there're more important things to worry about now."  
  
"I can't forget."  
  
"You shouldn't forget it all. Just Halloween."  
  
Remus closed his eyes. "I don't want to go back."  
  
"Well you are, so don't fight it."  
  
"I love you," he said solemnly.  
  
"There's no use loving me any more," she said sternly. "It's a waste of time. I'm gone. Just love yourself."  
  
"But..."  
  
"Don't love what's gone. Only remember it." Her voice softened. "James is there. Keep him with you."  
  
The sound of birds was filtering into his mind. Faintly, he could see the sunlight.  
  
"And Remus?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Stop drinking."  
  
He couldn't care less what she said. Her voice eased everything. "Alright."  
  
As soon as he felt the rough, splitting carpet beneath him, he knew she was gone. He woke slowly to the morning light, and for the first time in a long time, the sun felt warm to his skin.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~  
  
A little corny, I know. But hey. I'm only a freshman. Boy, can Remus whine or what?  
  
There. It's done. I'm not happy with it, but I haven't the endurance to rewrite any of it! IT'S OVER! *sigh of relief*. Now, If you want something to laugh at (because it is really old and therefore badly written) you can see what happened to Jamie!! (I apologize if it's Mary-sue-ish in the teensiest way) But it was the beginning to this story, so I couldn't delete it.  
  
Now... anybody wanna read a Tom Riddle fic that I've written pages of notes on but I'm not sure will follow through? It should be posted soon. It will be long, if not longer, but I've got BIG plans for this one. So... if you have way too much time on your hands... it won't be quick updates, but still...  
  
Thanks to all of you! This was fun... and now I'm sad. Oh well. 


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